Couples counseling is always a dicey proposition.
Can it work?
Sometimes.
Does it work MOST times?
Probably not.
But a lot of times, the answer to that last question depends on what you consider a "working relationship". In my view, a working relationship is one that RARELY seems like work. A working relationship, again in "my view", should be a relationship where both parties experience more good times, smooth sailing, and mostly "pain-free" compromises.
And this is not to say that relationships don't require sacrifices, adjustments, and a certain amount of selflessness from time to time. It's probably not a popular notion with many men even here in the Mature Man Forum, but the reality is---------------THAT'S part of being an ADULT, really.
But the trade off should always be that the two of you should be happier, more fulfilled, and better off in IMPORTANT ways "together" than you'd be "apart".
Sure, there'll be times where one person has to bite the WHOLE bullet on some things----but those cases should be rare, and it should NEVER always be the SAME person. iF ANYBODY is in a situation like this, then that person is definitely NOT in a relationship that I would think of as a "good" one.
The potential problem that marriage counselors face by the time that they finally enter the picture is that either one person in the relationship doesn't really give a damn ABOUT the relationship anymore---------or, one person in the relationship is on a mission to use the marriage counselor to further their own "one-sided" agenda.
This is what makes couples counseling dicey.
By contrast, when couples are already healthy, they're usually too busy to even consider couples counseling. Instead, when they have trouble working through problems, they tend to use their foundational physical attraction, their compatible core values, and their TRUE commitment as inspiration and motivation to SOLVE the problems THEMSELVES.
You see, folks in strong relationships tend to be ABLE to settle their bullshyt at home and behind closed doors----MOST of the time. That's why you'll sometimes never even know they've even been having any problems. And sometimes, they don't even tell their closest friends about what's been going on until long AFTER that crisis is over.
Why?
Because couples in relationships that are truly committed to each other DO NOT tend to elevate the danger-level of every internal skirmish that they may have with each other to the status of being "A REAL THREAT" to the continuance of their relationship.
PEACE...one day.
V.U.