couldn't break LMR even though acted cool .. what to do next time?

[cordoncordon]

As someone who has gone to Vegas, I don't know, 150 times in my life, half of which with a girl/girlfriend, I can tell you that going there with someone you don't really even like is going to be a nightmare for you. It is hard enough spending that much time there with someone you are really into. Trust me by the 3rd day you are usually ready to go home. You have to spend all day and night with her, you sleep with her, get dressed with her there, sh1t with her there, eat with her, it can get tiring.QUOTE]

This is a main reason I'm so down on the LTR bit. It just seems like you would get sick to death of each other. I lived with a serious LTR when I was 21-22, but we both had a bathroom and I don't remember feeling strangled. But when I think of LTRs now, I picture fighting and smelling sh!t and feeling trapped...I don't know, I may have an unhealthy bias against relationships.

That is, until I read the next "Beta of the Month" over at Roissy and shudder.

Well it can happen no doubt. I think I have been with 3 girls in my life who I truly enjoyed going on vacations with and spending that much time with. My current gf being one of them. I have probably been to Vegas 20 times in the past 2 years, and I have gone all but twice with her, and have enjoyed every second of it. Just us two. We truly are made for each other in that way. We just get along so well, enjoy the same things, and never get sick of each other. Never fight either. Its odd.

But for the OP, who doesn't really even like his girl? I just can't see him having a good time. Imagine waking up to her, showering with her there, pooping/peeing with her there, laying in bed with her there, eating with her, gambling with her, walking around with her, everything with her. Ive done that with a couple girls who i really didnt like that much, and its gets old fast. My advice is to go to Vegas with someone he really likes, and skip this trip.

 

[jophil28]

Ahoy there wise guys !

Here's a new story:
There's this girl that really has been into me since the moment I met her. I think I met her couple of months back in this one coffee shop I hang out very often. She'd call me out to places all the time, be nice to me even though I occasionally didn't respond to her texts or even her calls. All my buddies saw that she was really into me, and they mad fun of me because I have always been reluctant to "close the deal". I was hesitating until last night for two reasons:

1) She is in a committed relationship and she bored me to death with her stories about his boyfriend (or fiancee) whenever she had to chance of getting my attention for more than 5 minutes. So I really didn't feel like it for a long time although I had plenty of chances.

2) She is not HOT enough! A 6 maybe a 6.5 when she dresses up and puts make-up ..

She recently graduated (thank god) and moved to another city and her job starts in a couple of months. She's free until then. She decides to spend some of her free time here in her college town and some other places ..

Anyway, she relentlessly texted and called called yesterday so I finally went out with her. With zero effort on my part, after a long night, she ended up in my place and we started making out. (Well, I wasn't completely sober so I didn't mind going forward) .. Plus, she will completely disappear from my life very soon so why not, right?... The fact that she got a job and will be moving to Austin also encouraged me to escalate with her.

Well, after some heavy make-out she goes:

"You know my situation and I can't sleep with you"..

Ok so I wasn't really desperately horny and nor did I really really want to bang her so I said I am cool with it and I respect her decision. She did resist in the morning as well and then I had to go to work so it didn't go much forward.

Meanwhile, she wants me to take a 4-day break in the last week of January to go to Vegas with her. Just for a short crazy holiday... She proposed to cover the hotel and plane costs and she literally begged me to go with her. It's not that I'd let her cover everything if I were to go, but I didn't say anything at the time and I said I'd think about it ..

Some of you know I am a graduate student so taking 4 or 5 days off work is not a big deal for me, as I am not taking any classes.

But I also would like to defuse her defenses and fully enjoy my time with her in our future encounters

I have really been maintaining a cool, and positive attitude towards her so my question is, how can I "trick" her into sleeping with me without losing my firm ground here ?

Something just ain't right here ^
Either she is toying with the Boiler in some kind of 'get even' for all his standoffishness in the past, or Boiler is not "dailing her up " sufficiently before he went for the zipper .

However it is clear that she now holds the power, she knows it and she intends to exercise it for a some time to come.
She also knows that she has to dangle a BIG carrot to keep him around and because she has taken sex out of the deal(for now at least) she realized that she had to find a substitute benefit of high value to hold his attention.
Hence the offer of a trip to LV -all paid by her.

She is playing that old game of "Make you an offer too good to refuse".

There is a trap being set here- I can feel it .
This is way past a case of simple LMR. She wants and is planning some kind of payoff otherwise she would not be offering to spring for the expenses of taking a guy who is not her b/f to LV.

 

[Jitterbug]

As Admiral Ackbar would say: IT'S A TRAP!

She probably is just working on her next branch swing, unless BM holds some top secret stuff in his head that's worth a lot of money...

I still say go and enjoy it. How often you get random b1tches treat you to nice sh1t (sex aside)?

 

[Boilermaker]

Hmm .. Jophil got me thinking again.

I don't know what really goes in her head .. I still haven't said yes or no ..
Maybe I should be more cautious.

I don't know. I feel there's something fishy about it, too. Why would she do something like this? She barely knows me.

 

[Bluntmaster]

Hmm .. Jophil got me thinking again.

I don't know what really goes in her head .. I still haven't said yes or no ..
Maybe I should be more cautious.

I don't know. I feel there's something fishy about it, too. Why would she do something like this? She barely knows me.

When is the trip and how do you know she is serious? Where is the proof she is going to pay for all those things? She is probably going to see if you accept, and then cancel on you at the last minute.

I would tell her to get lost like you should have done when she was in your bed and wouldn't put out.

 

[Traveller2011]

Bail. She's a six? Why aren't you out looking for a 10 instead of wasting time with her?

 

[jophil28]

Hmm .. Jophil got me thinking again.

I don't know what really goes in her head .. I still haven't said yes or no ..
Maybe I should be more cautious.

I don't know. I feel there's something fishy about it, too. Why would she do something like this? She barely knows me.

The whole situation (free trip to LV) smells of some kind of "plan" by her.
I ma not suggesting that it is necessarily sinister or malevolent , but she is planning "something".

Let's look at the available data for a moment.

1) She has a regular B/f.
2) She is willing to get into a heavy make-out session but stopped short of fukking Boiler because she was in a "situation" . Therefore it is reasonable to assume that having sex is not her prime motivation in spending time with BM.
3) She has eagerly offered to take BM to LV for a 5 day break. All major expenses paid.

One can only speculate why she is willing to spend all that money and also risk having her B/f find out that she spent 4-5 days with another guy in Vegas.

She wants something very badly.

 

[Zunder]

Wow sHarp diagnosis ... I am impressed. Yes I am her teddy bear, whose teddy bear are you these days BTW?

Don't be such a bitter hater, bro. It's okay.

I won't take her offer, if that's burning your ass this bad, please don't get depressed over this sh!t ! :crackup:

Look mate, I am giving you advice because I have been in many similar situations over the years. I did not mean it to sounds sharp, I was just getting straight to the point.

As far as your little quip about my depression...I wouldn't wish it on anyone, and i hope you never go through it.