Could calling her out raise attraction?

[tomato]

LTR 3 years ended 8 weeks ago initiated by her, probably situational.

So met up twice kept everything totally cool and the dates were really good, F-close on second date 2 weeks ago.

Been in regular contact since - maybe too much - although usually let her initiate contact... when she comes over soon..... (btw what film is good?)

PROBLEM

She never admitted the things she did wrong at the end. YES I acted like a total moron AFC that was the cause BUT what she did was NOT cool.

Flirting with some looser guy, sending him pictures while we were still official and having sex with him pretty soon after (cant be sure how soon - finished with him now), now I can't be sure but seems like she's now acting like some kind of PUA spinning loads of guys as plates as options (although I doubt she's closing any) - She never admitted any of this and I dont know if she knows that I know - NOW tries to make it seem like shes some kind of angel not doing anything like it and even said she wants no sex before marriage! (almost had to lol)

Should I just act like I dont even know or care? Doesn't that make me seem like a walkover? Wouldn't calling her out and telling her that wasn't cool and her spinning plates while seeing me is not cool - and then effectively dump her till she comes to me with a proper apology and saying she wants to change etc?

What will raise attraction most?

 

[Htienvu]

LTR of 3 years, you guys broke up and she fked someone right after. Why would you still want a wh0re like that to be your gf? let her be your fk buddy at best, don't call her out on anything.

 

[betheman]

what will raise attraction most??? are you serious?

you walking off into the sunset with another hot woman is the very best that will work, other than that, use this woman for se x and nothing else, also, wrpa it up, if she is banging loads of other guys, who knows what she may be carrying, but really, you need to let this one go

 

[Zerro]

Walk away, don't say another word to her, just stop giving a damn about her entirely.

Will that drive her crazy? Perhaps, but you shouldn't have any intention of taking her back anyway.

 

[Juan Don]

LTR of 3 years, you guys broke up and she fked someone right after. Why would you still want a wh0re like that to be your gf? let her be your fk buddy at best, don't call her out on anything.

yup. and act like what happened in the past never affected you as well as the breakup

 

[Gangster Of Love]

LTR 3 years ended 8 weeks ago initiated by her, probably situational.

So met up twice kept everything totally cool and the dates were really good, F-close on second date 2 weeks ago.

second date, what, who, where, huh? What are you now courting this broad? Am I missing something here? You are going backwards. You don't "date" and F-close an ex you F'ed for 3 years. And it took you until the second date to F her? What da fak is wrong with you?

Saying she doesn't want to have sex anymore until marriage = "I have no desire to have sex with you anymore, but I would really like us to be friends."

Welcome to the real world. Women, due to the fact they get inundated with attention, are natural plate spinners. To think she would be your little virgin nun while you two were apart is totally naive.

You shouldn't even try to win her over, much less "call her out", because that would just confirm to her the AFC little bitsh that you were when you were trying to hold onto her.

Remember, she broke up with you because she wanted to upgrade, at least in her own mind, therefore already had somebody lined up. Somebody she was really into, who she was able to get naked with soon after, if not while, you two were done.

If you must, and only if she comes begging like a dog, you could put her on the waiting list to be a F-buddy, and only on your terms. Under no circumstance should you ask for a relationship or have a heart to heart. She needs to be on probation. Better yet, move on!

You win some, you learn some!

 

[Jariel]

About 4 years ago I ended up having an argument with my best friend's girlfriend. She had spoken to me very disrespectfully so I called her out. She had a tantrum and walked off. My best friend could see I was totally in the right and initially he took my side.

Over the coming days she laid a guilt trip on him, saying he should back her up if he loved her. He later confessed to me that he'd caved in and agreed with her that she was in the right, at least to her face, even though he knew it wasn't true. I wasn't particularly angry at him, but I lost all my respect for him for being such a doormat. His philosophy was to just agree with her and don't cause any waves.

Meanwhile, my best friend, girlfriend and many of our mutual friends started pushing me out of their circle as though I was the bad guy, when all I did was stand up for myself and call her out.

Fast forward to last year, my former best friend and his girlfriend are happily married. And I actually regret calling her out on her behaviour that night. Sure, I stood up for myself and retained my dignity, but I was the one who lost out in the long run.

Everything you read on this forum and in PUA material will urge you to stand up for yourself, call women out and reap the rewards, but in real life, sometimes it's best to bite your tongue and let it go.


That said, this is not really applicable to the OP as I really think you need to ditch her and move on.

 

[Jariel]

Saying she doesn't want to have sex anymore until marriage = "I have no desire to have sex with you anymore, but I would really like us to be friends."

Welcome to the real world. Women, due to the fact they get inundated with attention, are natural plate spinners. To think she would be your little virgin nun while you two were apart is totally naive.

You shouldn't even try to win her over, much less "call her out", because that would just confirm to her the AFC little bitsh that you were when you were trying to hold onto her.

Remember, she broke up with you because she wanted to upgrade, at least in her own mind, therefore already had somebody lined up. Somebody she was really into, who she was able to get naked with soon after, if not while, you two were done.

I definitely recommend listening to this advice. You're clinging, you're trying to win her over when she rejected you. If she's not chasing you and not begging for you back, then it really is a lost cause. The more you try, the further it will drive her.

The only feasible way of regaining her interest is to literally move on and meet someone else.

 

[cola]

Why you want her? Go find someone who looks better and move on

 

[Htienvu]

About 4 years ago I ended up having an argument with my best friend's girlfriend. She had spoken to me very disrespectfully so I called her out. She had a tantrum and walked off. My best friend could see I was totally in the right and initially he took my side.

Over the coming days she laid a guilt trip on him, saying he should back her up if he loved her. He later confessed to me that he'd caved in and agreed with her that she was in the right, at least to her face, even though he knew it wasn't true. I wasn't particularly angry at him, but I lost all my respect for him for being such a doormat. His philosophy was to just agree with her and don't cause any waves.

Meanwhile, my best friend, girlfriend and many of our mutual friends started pushing me out of their circle as though I was the bad guy, when all I did was stand up for myself and call her out.

Fast forward to last year, my former best friend and his girlfriend are happily married. And I actually regret calling her out on her behaviour that night. Sure, I stood up for myself and retained my dignity, but I was the one who lost out in the long run.

Everything you read on this forum and in PUA material will urge you to stand up for yourself, call women out and reap the rewards, but in real life, sometimes it's best to bite your tongue and let it go.


That said, this is not really applicable to the OP as I really think you need to ditch her and move on.

You think you've lost out! However, I think you've gained something even more valuable. You gained SELF RESPECT!!!

 

[Alex DeLarge]

Dude...

DUMP THAT B1TCH!

What are you stupid?! You're crazy to even give yourself ONE SECOND TO CONSIDER letting this wh0re back into your LIFE.. LET ALONE.. TAKE HER BACK AS YOUR GIRLFRIEND.

Move on dude, it must be hard coming out of an LTR.. But pain is weakness leaving the body. Go mack it to other chicks!

 

[nismo-4]

Could calling her out raise her attraction?

F**k no!!!

Your princess is in another castle. Go look for someone better and move on! Stop dwelling over this girl, it sounds like oneitis.

Don't you realize that women always spin plates and have absolutely no problem dumping you? When you sense things going south, keep your distance and spin more plates (you should be anyway).

Moving on and forgetting this b**ch entirely is the best option right now that is for you. That's my ruling.

Case closed.

 

[IamJosan]

I feel bad for your friend.

About 4 years ago I ended up having an argument with my best friend's girlfriend. She had spoken to me very disrespectfully so I called her out. She had a tantrum and walked off. My best friend could see I was totally in the right and initially he took my side.

Over the coming days she laid a guilt trip on him, saying he should back her up if he loved her. He later confessed to me that he'd caved in and agreed with her that she was in the right, at least to her face, even though he knew it wasn't true. I wasn't particularly angry at him, but I lost all my respect for him for being such a doormat. His philosophy was to just agree with her and don't cause any waves.

Meanwhile, my best friend, girlfriend and many of our mutual friends started pushing me out of their circle as though I was the bad guy, when all I did was stand up for myself and call her out.

Fast forward to last year, my former best friend and his girlfriend are happily married. And I actually regret calling her out on her behaviour that night. Sure, I stood up for myself and retained my dignity, but I was the one who lost out in the long run.

Everything you read on this forum and in PUA material will urge you to stand up for yourself, call women out and reap the rewards, but in real life, sometimes it's best to bite your tongue and let it go.


That said, this is not really applicable to the OP as I really think you need to ditch her and move on.

 

[runner83]

Could calling her out raise her attraction?

F**k no!!!

Your princess is in another castle. Go look for someone better and move on! Stop dwelling over this girl, it sounds like oneitis.

Don't you realize that women always spin plates and have absolutely no problem dumping you? When you sense things going south, keep your distance and spin more plates (you should be anyway).

Moving on and forgetting this b**ch entirely is the best option right now that is for you. That's my ruling.

Case closed.

Judge Nismo has ruled correctly as usual.

As head of the jury, I hereby sentence you to 3 months in the Rosie Palm Penitentiary, Dry Streak County, Arizona.

As part of your rehabilitation, you will be required to read this post, learn from it and move on:

"Calling her out" = EPIC FAIL

Date of release is to be determined at a future date, depedent on your rehabilitation progress.

May the Gods of Getting Laid have mercy on your soul.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Girls cant be pua. Those are called hoes.

 

[tomato]

second date, what, who, where, huh? What are you now courting this broad? Am I missing something here? You are going backwards. You don't "date" and F-close an ex you F'ed for 3 years. And it took you until the second date to F her? What da fak is wrong with you?

Saying she doesn't want to have sex anymore until marriage = "I have no desire to have sex with you anymore, but I would really like us to be friends."

Welcome to the real world. Women, due to the fact they get inundated with attention, are natural plate spinners. To think she would be your little virgin nun while you two were apart is totally naive.

You shouldn't even try to win her over, much less "call her out", because that would just confirm to her the AFC little bitsh that you were when you were trying to hold onto her.

Remember, she broke up with you because she wanted to upgrade, at least in her own mind, therefore already had somebody lined up. Somebody she was really into, who she was able to get naked with soon after, if not while, you two were done.

If you must, and only if she comes begging like a dog, you could put her on the waiting list to be a F-buddy, and only on your terms. Under no circumstance should you ask for a relationship or have a heart to heart. She needs to be on probation. Better yet, move on!

You win some, you learn some!

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR INPUT

Sadly I think your mostly right here - she wasnt like this before but she's chaged to it now I think...

 

[tomato]

Judge Nismo has ruled correctly as usual.

As head of the jury, I hereby sentence you to 3 months in the Rosie Palm Penitentiary, Dry Streak County, Arizona.

As part of your rehabilitation, you will be required to read this post, learn from it and move on:

"Calling her out" = EPIC FAIL

Date of release is to be determined at a future date, depedent on your rehabilitation progress.

May the Gods of Getting Laid have mercy on your soul.

Awesome thread thank you! I tried 6 weeks of NC till she broke it telling me she missed me - I now realise I should have made her work for it - instead I acted like nothing happend and started gaming her like other girls..... was too nice too easy

 

[tomato]

yup. and act like what happened in the past never affected you as well as the breakup

I think this is the single best line of advice.

agreed?

 

[bigneil]

Short answer: no. Advice: nc. Get another girl. It's over. She's a 70's muscle car with frame rot.

Louis and Copeland cover this conflict of interest well.

1) Always call her on her bad behavior.
2) Never reward her for her bad behavior (which yelling at them can do sometimes).
3) If you want to tell her off then by all means do, but don't think it will lead to sex.

That said, I have in the past told women off and turned them on at the same time, but only in the early dating phase, when I became the dominant man in her life. I've also had relationships end forever that way.