Cool and indifferent v warm and friendly

[rgeere]

Ok I have to put in my two cents here....

I have actually been both of these guys.

I went long periods of time being the charming guy who complements girls.
I had twelve girls who always wanted to hang around me, tell me I needed a girl-friend, insist I go places with them, and in some cases they ignored their own borefriends, I mean boyfriends, to be with me.

That lasted for about two years of my life when I was really happy about losing 30 pounds and becoming physically fit after a hugh bought of depression.

Sadly, I went through another stage of depression for one year and the girls who foundme interesting before faded away.

I went back to being aloof with this fvck off attitude.

I found this website, and started applying the principles.

Well, I kept the aloof fvck off attitude and began applying ****y/funny, sarcasm, and teasing to my interactions with other people..

The girls who were attracted tome before with my charismatic friendly attitude and always smiling have found themselves becoming pissed off with my attitude...

However,

The younger more feminine catty/manipulative girls,are falling all over this fvck off I do what I want attitude. I have to beat them off with a stick.

So,I gues it depends what you want..

If you want mature girls who enjoy having friendly mature guys around who are charming and charismatic, then act charming and charasmatic.

If you want the younger, slightly more feminine, catty/manipulative girls then act aloof with a fvck off attitude.

 

[AMF]

Wow, I was going to post a thread when I saw this...

Went out saturday night a little bit high (I assure you it doesnt happen often) to this really busy, classy bar laden with the finest women available in this city...

I went with some HB7 im seeing and friends....

Basically due to some sort of drug-induced paralysis I could barely make conversation or even smile (i'm normally pretty outgoing and loud)... seriously (no need to flame me, Im flaming myself here!)

So i sit there just kind of looking around, i suppose "mean & moody", checking out women, while HB7 ocassionally kisses & hugs me (good girl - doesnt even mind me totally incapacitated )

Ok and I have to say that Ive NEVER had so much attentiion... walking through the bar was a total ego trip. NOTHING like when Ive got some personality...

Reckon it couldve been the sexy "drug-pupils" lol

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Matt Rogers
An issue that has always confused me is whether women prefer the cool, indifferent, and unemotional type (e.g James Bond) or the warm, friendly and charming, smiley type. David D always recommends the former category, saying it is best to act as if you are disinterested and not particularly impressed with her. But in my personal experience girls seem to go for the charmers who smile a lot, seem genuinely interested in the girl and often compliment them a lot.

What does everyone think?

Have you ever SEEN a James Bond movie? James Bond is BOTH of the types you just described. Cool, indifferent, unemotional, warm, friendly, and charming all at once.

Stop acting like it's two sides of a black-and-white spectrum. You CAN be one AND the other at the same time. You can be a "nice jerk." You can be friendly and indifferent at the same time. Stop placing two traits at opposite ends of the universe to make excuses for having one but not the other.

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

i have to say your right there, me and caveman aggreed this right from the begining of this post, if you take a look, but it looks like people ignored it

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by check_mate_kid_uk
i have to say your right there, me and caveman aggreed this right from the begining of this post, if you take a look, but it looks like people ignored it

I see that...sometimes people say sh!t that trips me off and I just reply off the cuff instead of reading what other people have to say.

 

[SageOFAllenAge]

How about Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca ..

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Be cool and indifferent, then turn on the charm when the time calls for it. You can only be cold and unapproachable for so long, because inevitably, you're going to have to be a little more engaging otherwise the girl will a) lose interest or b) think you aren't interested in her.

 

[jakethasnake]

Originally posted by Don Juanabbe
Be cool and indifferent, then turn on the charm when the time calls for it. You can only be cold and unapproachable for so long, because inevitably, you're going to have to be a little more engaging otherwise the girl will a) lose interest or b) think you aren't interested in her.

This advice is for the transitioning period from "dating" to "burdgeoning relationship". Be hot/cold during the dating period - and gradually open up more and be more warm/caring than aloof as the new relationship gets rolling.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
This advice is for the transitioning period from "dating" to "burdgeoning relationship". Be hot/cold during the dating period - and gradually open up more and be more warm/caring than aloof as the new relationship gets rolling.

Yes, that's a good elaboration on what I stated - you gotta keep them off balance for awhile at first. This accomplishes two things: Not coming off as desparate, and also keeping that good old challenge thing happening.