Consequences of my Actions - The Search for Resolve

[Diaforetikos]

Bare with me... This is a long story, but I need some assistance. Let's begin.


My coworker recently broke up with her boyfriend... Well he broke up with her. She cheated on him multiple times. I was one of em. I have always wanted to lose my V-card with her. So when she finally came over literally begging for it, I couldn't say no. My goal come to life before my eyes... How could I past that up?!


Throughout the beginning of her break up, she didn't really talk to me. So I talked to her. Since we were already FBs, she could talk to me without me getin put in the friend zone. She started opening up to me more and more...


We had lots of sex. Either I would ask her if I could come over, or she would invite me. Everytime after sex, we would open up to each other. I grew fearful that she started to like me, but I liked talking to her, and sleeping with her.


One day we were at my friends house drinking. Shes an angry drunk but only towards me. So were argue and fight. It's fun. So I decide to take a shower. She gets pissed and asks why I'm doing that. I tell her I feel like taking one. I take my shower and get a text from her saying, "Why are you taking a shower? Can we go home?"

I get out and see her eyes all read. She had been crying. We leave and I ask her why she is crying. She tells menshe went on facebook and saw her ex having a good time and all this other bull. We then get into this deep conversation...


Come to find out that she told one of her friends about me and about how much she hates me. Her friend saw right through her mask of hate and in the end my girl, "L", actually does like me. So that threw me off. She's cool to hang around. We have fun and stuff, but I wasn't expecting that. She goes on this huge rant on why she likes me. But reality sinks in.


We can't be in a relationship. I go to church and believe in God. She's super anti-Christian. Plus her mom said if she dates a black guy, she'll disown her. So all we could do is sleep around.


At this point I realize it's time to spin another plate... I start talking to this new girl, "C". She is great LTR material. I'd feel like a jerk trying to hit it and quit it, so I decide I should try to find out as much as possible about her before I jump into it. While I'm doing this, I'm still sleeping with L.


Things start to get hectic. Spinning plates is a lot harder than I thought...


This Friday rolls around. I need to go fix my phone, so I gotta go outta town 45 minutes away. I decide to take C with me, have some fun and stuff. After I handle my phone business, we decide to go to H&M. While were there, I'm kissing and playing with C. We get upstairs and guess who is there... L!!!


We are in a city 45 minutes away!! At a random store to top it off!! L sees me with her. I play it off as smooth as possible. Now, L is pretty much upset with me. I still want them cheeks!! C has strong morals and convictions. She won't give it up easy. I don't know what to do now?? This is the most AFC I've been in a long time.


I haven't read a problem like this on the site before. I was thinking I cut my losses and work with what I got with C or I can be my normal stubborn self and try to salvage it. I'm for the latter, but reason belongs to the former.

 

[JLW]

We can't be in a relationship. I go to church and believe in God. She's super anti-Christian. Plus her mom said if she dates a black guy, she'll disown her. So all we could do is sleep around.

This.

If you have diametrically opposed views of the world, this relationship will be a disaster. Stop seeing this girl.

It would be one thing if she were just kind of agnostic and didn't really care either way about it (and even that would be iffy depending on how religious you really are, although considering you're having pre-marital sex with girls something tells me you're pretty moderate in terms of religion).

But if she's a really strong atheist then there's no way you guys will ever have anything together. So why bother continuing to bang her? I mean yeah, I guess it makes you d1ck feel good. But who really cares in the grand scheme of things?

Why continue to see this girl? The more time you spend seeing her, the more it's going to hurt both of you when you eventually stop hanging out. And you KNOW you're going to stop hanging out because you said it yourself: she hates Christians, and you are a Christian.


Go with the girl who has strong moral convictions and PRINCIPLES. Not the girl who is a jealous psycho ***** who gets mad when her ex boyfriend has a good time, who she CHEATED ON. Who is more of a quality girl? The answer seems obvious to me.

 

[Diaforetikos]

Thanks JLW. That's exactly what I needed to hear. I stopped spinning plates and decided to go with C.


I've known L for over 2 years, and she's what I wanted for so long. She wouldn't open up to me. I tried so hard for her to just let loose, and she never would. She hated me to the core for a whole year. Then she went to college for a whole year. When she came back, she saw how much I changed and decided she wanted me.

After sex, she opened up to me. Exactly what I wanted from her. But I wasn't gonna get hurt first. She cheated on her boyfriend. I started to spin another plate, but L liked me too much, and in the end I hurt her. She told me today that she cried over after she found out. I felt horrible. I wanna be a DJ, but not like this.

So in the end I decided to stay with C. I got too much going on right now to be spinning plates. I shouldn't have even got in a relationship with C, but I'm selfish and stubborn as hell.


Lets see how long this last... I'm young, dumb, and reckless.... But thats how I live my life. C:

 

[JLW]

Hey Di,

You don't necessarily have to stop spinning plates. Just drop L as a plate.

Find some other plates if you can.

Just make sure that it is clear to C that you are not in an exclusive relationship with each other yet.

 

[joe henny]

Wait till you start spinnig 5 to ten plates, than you'll see how hard it really gets homie