Confused about picking up on IL in shopping stores

[supertrooper]

I'm a bit confused on picking up on IL from girls in clothing shopping stores. A typical situation: I'm walking to the cash register and i see a HB. I make eye contact and sorta give a sly grin. She immediately looks away and walks somewhere else, so I assume that she doesn't have IL in me. Then few seconds later i happen to turn around and she directly behind me. It appears shes just looking at clothes, but it also seem like shes purposely staying in close proximity. I'm probably just over analyzing things, but this happens quite often to me and i just wanted to hear you guys prespective on it.

Oh yeah if anyone could give me some openers to start a convo in this setting would be great. Thanks.

 

[Survivor]

First off, mad props for making the effort to talk to girls.

In general, shopping stores are a tough place for a beginner to hone his skills because he's often unsure whether or not the cute sales girl is being nice because she's interested in him or just trying to sell him something.

Supertrooper, the best thing to do with every girl is look your best, make casual small talk and close by at least asking for the home phone number. Don't concern yourself too much with IL. Yet at the same time, don't pester a girl who is obviously not interested in you either. Anything other than a yes is a no.

Run a search on "opening lines" so you'll get a few ideas. In fact here's one:

A few months ago I was in a long check-out line at a local Wal-Mart. By the time I reached the counter, the cute sales girl was noticably tired. Seizing the oppurtunity to hone my skills, I smiled and asked, "Where would you rather be right now?"

Her reaction was priceless! "Are you kidding? I'd be out getting my hair and nails done, I'd be at the park with my kids, then I'd go home and blah, blah, blah...What would YOU be doing?" She enjoyed the convo so such that she held up the line 5 mintues just to talk to me. I didn't number close ,though (I'm engaged.)

Point is, my opening line of "Where would you rather be right now?" let her know immediately that I empathized with what she was experiencing at that time. It set me apart from the other customers. Again run a search to find other ideas.

Malls and shopping stores are good for beginners to practice eye contact and saying "hi" but a little bit on the difficult side for number closing. If it seems like you're not getting any success at all, try environments with a lower level of difficulty like classrooms or house parties.

Again don't overanalyze things. Just maintain a clean and neat appearance and put your best foot forward. Use common sense, stick to the basics and you'll develop just fine.

 

[FlyGuy]

Focus on the conversation first. See a cute girl at a store? Get eye contact? Go in for the conversation. Heck, go in for the convo even if you don't get eye contact (eye contact is just a better way to start things off).

Next, break the ice. You can just say "hi" or you can open with a question like "Do you know what time it is?" (of course, don't use this if you have a watch on ) It doesn't matter much what you use for the opening line, you just want to start the conversation. Your body language and appearance will be much more important than your opening line.

Then just get a basic conversation going from there. Use humor if you can, but don't force it. Keep it light, don't come on too strong, think about it as if you were just chatting up a stranger while killing some time if it helps. Practice getting this far first, this is half the battle.

Now if she's being friendly with you and seems to enjoy the conversation, go for the number. If she seems stand-offish or like she is trying to ignore you then just be polite and break off the conversation - unless you have absolutely no fear of rejection in which case you can ask for the number regardless.

Just keep it simple, don't try to see how dialated her eyes are or crap like that. If she's being friendly and seems to enjoy your company you can take that as a good sign. Also if she asks you questions in return, that's a good sign.

 

[supertrooper]

Thanks for the replies fellas, but i have one question for flyguy, can I really number close without making a girl laugh? Isn't that a bad thing?

 

[FlyGuy]

Why would she laugh, and why would it be a bad thing to go for the number? If you don't ask for the number, what's the point in approaching girls aside from working on your conversation skills? Believe it or not most girls know when you are picking up on them and they will act according to how they feel about it. If they like you (or the attention at least) they'll be friendly, ask questions about YOU, and/or flirt. If they aren't interested they'll act rude, stand-offish, or just be polite but not overly friendly.

You have to leave your ego at home though, because you WILL get shot down and some girls WILL be b!tches. That's just the name of the game. But you have to realize that it IS a game and that there are many reasons why a girl may not want to give you her number. Maybe she's got a boyfriend already, maybe she's a lesbian, maybe you remind her of an ex that she hates, maybe she had a really bad day and wants to take it out on you, who knows. I also guarantee that you will eventually get some numbers though, so DON'T let it affect you personally when you do get shot down. You might have to go through ten rejections before you get a number. So what? You approach 50 women that you like and come away with 5 numbers. Not a bad start.

 

[midwest_kc]

I'm partially color blind, and this is the one time that it works in my favor. since I can see most colors, it's shades that I can't see, I find a horrible color combination and just go up to them and be like"Im sorry, but I'm colorblind, could you tell me, does this match?" Some girls will give you a polite "no" and then you can ask if they would mind helping you pick out an outfit for something important. Depending on the type of outfit, you can use anything from a dinner with the boss and his wife to a first date that you want to impress (this also lets them know that you are desirable).

One time a girl just grabbed my arm, and said "Oh my god I've got to help you" and it was that easy. It's a little difficult, but I'm no master DJ either. I just originally did it out of need, and if you have to talk to someone about wheter or not clothes match, it might as well be a hottie, right?

 

[supertrooper]

Originally posted by midwest_kc
I'm partially color blind, and this is the one time that it works in my favor. since I can see most colors, it's shades that I can't see, I find a horrible color combination and just go up to them and be like"Im sorry, but I'm colorblind, could you tell me, does this match?" Some girls will give you a polite "no" and then you can ask if they would mind helping you pick out an outfit for something important. Depending on the type of outfit, you can use anything from a dinner with the boss and his wife to a first date that you want to impress (this also lets them know that you are desirable).

One time a girl just grabbed my arm, and said "Oh my god I've got to help you" and it was that easy. It's a little difficult, but I'm no master DJ either. I just originally did it out of need, and if you have to talk to someone about wheter or not clothes match, it might as well be a hottie, right?

well thats definitely innovative. You should post that in the tip section. As for flyguy , i was asking if you have to be humerous on the intial approach.

 

[LaidbackCharmer]

Originally posted by supertrooper
I'm a bit confused on picking up on IL from girls in clothing shopping stores. A typical situation: I'm walking to the cash register and i see a HB. I make eye contact and sorta give a sly grin. She immediately looks away and walks somewhere else, so I assume that she doesn't have IL in me. Then few seconds later i happen to turn around and she directly behind me. It appears shes just looking at clothes, but it also seem like shes purposely staying in close proximity. I'm probably just over analyzing things, but this happens quite often to me and i just wanted to hear you guys prespective on it.

Oh yeah if anyone could give me some openers to start a convo in this setting would be great. Thanks.

In this case, I would assume interest and approach...

LBC

 

[-HPNOTQ-]

startrooper.

cold PU's at a shopping mall and testing store employee's IL is a tough task even for an experience DJ. I used to work at a very nice urban clothing store in the mall. I saw how my very hot female co-workers were using KINO, C/F lines and other DJism type things to make their sales. in the end, they would just laugh at the fellas they flirted with to make a sale.

i'd rather hone in my IL spotting skills at a more neutral location..school or your place of work would be better territory.

-HQ

 

[supertrooper]

Originally posted by -HPNOTQ-
startrooper.

cold PU's at a shopping mall and testing store employee's IL is a tough task even for an experience DJ. I used to work at a very nice urban clothing store in the mall. I saw how my very hot female co-workers were using KINO, C/F lines and other DJism type things to make their sales. in the end, they would just laugh at the fellas they flirted with to make a sale.

i'd rather hone in my IL spotting skills at a more neutral location..school or your place of work would be better territory.

-HQ

I wont be able to attend school until the fall, but i was mainly talking about other female shoppers in the store. Also, can you suggest some other places to hone my skills? Cuz most of my coworkers aren't young, its mostly older ppl . Since i sorta deal with floor sales, i could possibly try PUs then, but i'm afraid i could get fired if i do it at the wrong time.