Let me ask you guys. If you were about to get onto a high-performance motorcycle, what would you prefer?
Confidence or Competence?
Hopefully, you chose the later.
I hear this all the time, "if only I had more confidence..." and whatever it is. For the most part, it's approaching. You think to yourself, the only way I can get over my fear of approaching is if I just approach all the time. Now don't get me wrong, my first ever approach I was much more scared than say my 100th. There is a correlation between competence increasing and confidence increasing.
Even the BEST PUA's get approach anxiety (or FMR - First Minute Resistance). It's biologically hardwired into us to get that fear. It's a natural occurence. Think back 40,000 years ago (when people lived in a tribe - so basically a 50 person society). If you approached a women who was taken by the tribal leader or one of his group members, they would kill you. Even if the women isn't taken, she will go to her friends and say you can't court a women.
Therefore, your genes have just been unapologetically weeded out of existence by nature.
There are 2 factors in Humanity. Survival & Replication. Both your survival and replication are at risk when approaching a women. Now you might ask, but this is now, that stuff doesn't happen (for the most part, occasionally the unfortunate DJ will get his skull bashed in because the girls boyfriend responded to his instincts). Good point, and a good way to overcome your fear, however it is still hardwired into our brains. We are fascinating and complex machines. Yet we are outdated machines, by about 40,000 years.
Like I mentioned earlier, even the best PUA's - even after thousands of approaches - get approach anxiety.
Now, There are 2 ways to cope with this anxiety.
- Building competence (which is learning The Game - so read up and implement as much as you can).
- Building a familiarity with your social environment. For example, remember your first day of school at a new school. You probably felt nervous, but after a while you got used to your surroundings and that nervousness went away. The more you put yourself in an area, the more you familiarize yourself with it, the more you OWN it (this is a good frame of mind to have while sarging). How much more comfortable do you feel within your home, than someone else's? You feel MUCH more different, and much more in control.
Familiarize yourself with new environments as often as possible. You don't like clubs? Well go to them anyways, so when you are in that environment you will have a better frame.
Don't worry about your confidence. You'll gain it along with competence when you sarge. Don't let confidence hold you back from approaching.
Regards,
- Zod
Confidence or Competence?
Hopefully, you chose the later.
I hear this all the time, "if only I had more confidence..." and whatever it is. For the most part, it's approaching. You think to yourself, the only way I can get over my fear of approaching is if I just approach all the time. Now don't get me wrong, my first ever approach I was much more scared than say my 100th. There is a correlation between competence increasing and confidence increasing.
Even the BEST PUA's get approach anxiety (or FMR - First Minute Resistance). It's biologically hardwired into us to get that fear. It's a natural occurence. Think back 40,000 years ago (when people lived in a tribe - so basically a 50 person society). If you approached a women who was taken by the tribal leader or one of his group members, they would kill you. Even if the women isn't taken, she will go to her friends and say you can't court a women.
Therefore, your genes have just been unapologetically weeded out of existence by nature.
There are 2 factors in Humanity. Survival & Replication. Both your survival and replication are at risk when approaching a women. Now you might ask, but this is now, that stuff doesn't happen (for the most part, occasionally the unfortunate DJ will get his skull bashed in because the girls boyfriend responded to his instincts). Good point, and a good way to overcome your fear, however it is still hardwired into our brains. We are fascinating and complex machines. Yet we are outdated machines, by about 40,000 years.
Like I mentioned earlier, even the best PUA's - even after thousands of approaches - get approach anxiety.
Now, There are 2 ways to cope with this anxiety.
- Building competence (which is learning The Game - so read up and implement as much as you can).
- Building a familiarity with your social environment. For example, remember your first day of school at a new school. You probably felt nervous, but after a while you got used to your surroundings and that nervousness went away. The more you put yourself in an area, the more you familiarize yourself with it, the more you OWN it (this is a good frame of mind to have while sarging). How much more comfortable do you feel within your home, than someone else's? You feel MUCH more different, and much more in control.
Familiarize yourself with new environments as often as possible. You don't like clubs? Well go to them anyways, so when you are in that environment you will have a better frame.
Don't worry about your confidence. You'll gain it along with competence when you sarge. Don't let confidence hold you back from approaching.
Regards,
- Zod