Competition: How do you react?

[Ricky]

OK, I'll admit it, the competition really bothers me at times.

Have you ever gone into a club and seen there were tons of guys there and also plenty of hot chicks? But it still seems to be a sausage fest.

Here are two common reactions that I have and that are clearly counterproductive to DJing. I am looking for advice

1) I compare myself to other guys and feel intimidated by guys I think are better looking then me, or more alpha

2) I get pissed because there are so many dudes there. I admit it. Or I get pissed.

ON THE FLIP SIDE:
1) Interestingly enough, if I arrive at the bar early and it isn't crowded, I feel I claim my territory, plus I have a few drinks to get more relaxed.

2) If the bar isn't that crowded, or I get off to a good start with the ladies I don't care.


Now this doesn't happen all the time but I am wondering what the best strategies are to deal with this. I guess it is flat out jealousy in some cases. How do you deal with this? This can also happen to me in other situations as well. I want to spark my competitive nature in get in a better mood about all of this. Any advice is appreciated.

 

[Slickster]

I did some research for you over at ASF. Credit Tyler Durden for this stuff. If you're unfamiliar with some of the acronyms don't worry they use some different ones over there.

AMOG is Alpha Male Other Guy
PUA is Pick up Artist

This should help if you run into any competition.

AMOG DESTROYERS

The easy way to handle any alpha is to be polite to him, but act disinterested by his rap/accomplishments using tonality/body language (without coming off as patronizing/sarcastic) while simultaneously being charming to others around you. This will drop his perceived value and cause him to qualify himself to try and raise it back up. He can't fight you or do **** like that, and he can't move to insults, because you've been polite and in doing so he would be making himself look VERY BAD. The only tactic vs this is to walk away. If you reward him just enough to encourage further qualifying but not enough to make him feel validated again he will fall into line as beta in relation to you. I blow out rich men in power outfits, top ranking professors in schools, 300lb bouncers, police officers and gangers ALL THE TIME. This **** works - if you do it right they will work VERY HARD to be your friend.


Ultra quick and effective AMOG destroyer

This is just like the JAP Busting stuff, where you say "you're cool", as a way of tricking him to qualify himself to you.

He's stuck, because if he DOES do well, he's qualified himself to you. If he doesn't, he's failed to. The only answer he would have would be to say back to you "hey now, you're cool.. I didn't mean to step on your toes man.. You're a smart guy, keep talking to her and I'll watch and learn man!"..
Of course to that, you could reply, "You just met me and you already say I'm smart and cool? hahah"


More AMOG destroyer

AMOG: How do you guys know eachother?
PUA: Her? I ****ed her.
(Girl will go "aaaaaaaaah... hahahahah, I did NOT!!! But she'll hit you and be giggling and start crawling all over you...).

AMOG: Hey, this is a nice girl.
PUA: Her.. she's a slut..
(Again, girl will start going "nooooo!" while giggling her ass off and crawling on you.. this is very deflating to the guy trying to cut in)

AMOG: Hey girls whats up (or whatever)
PUA: Hey dude dude (putting hands up like you give up).. I will pay you a HUNDRED dollars right now, to take these girls away from me.
(Girls will go "no no no... we love you PUA.. noooooo" and giggle and crawl on you.. Again, immediately deflating to the guy)

AMOG: Hey girls what's up (or whatever)
PUA: Dude, OMG that shirt is AWESOME.. I had one just like it in highschool, it ****ing rocks man.. Having a good time in London man.. It's awesome huh? Dude you're like the coolest guy I met all night.. (patting him on the shoulder)..

AMOG: (showing signs that he wants to fight)
PUA: hahah, dude, are you like trying to pick a fight with me? hahahha.. ok ok hold up hold up.. wait a sec, we'll do even better.. first... we'll have an armwrestling competition.. then second.. we'll do one armed pushups.. and last..... POSE-DOWN!!

(then you start flexing and go "ladies?", and they start saying how you're so strong, and the AMOG looks like a tool.. you're tooling him, by making him seem like he's trying too hard to impress the girls by showing them superiority).

AMOG: Hey man.. keep talking.. no no, let's hear your pitch man.. pick these girls up man, you're doing awesome.
PUA: Hey, you know I've gotta try to impress you COOL (x-city, x-dressed, x-whateverquality) guys.. You guys ****ing ROCK.
(cut him down on whatever limited amount of knowledge you have of him, even if its not relevant whatsoever, he'll feel uncomfortable and his bodylanguage will show it)

AMOG: (starts touching you to show dominance)
PUA: hahhaha, DUUUUDE, I'm not into guys man... dude, there's club-gay-whatever over there man.. hands off the merchandise buddy
(girls laugh at him, then he starts qualifying himself to you that he's not gay)

AMOG: (gets in your face)
PUA: (don't answer.. just SIT there quiet.. the more he says stuff to you, the more he's TRYING.. talking too long without an answer is QUALIFYING yourself.. so if he keeps trying to out-alpha you, and you don't answer, eventually he looks beta because he tried too hard to get your attention.. another trick is to make "let's get out of here" girlcode with your eyes to the girls (mimmick what they do to eachother when you do a bad set), and they'll leave with you)

AMOG: (gets in your face)
PUA: dude, you're an alphamale..
AMOG: what's that..
PUA: you know, like the leader of the pack.. you call the shots.. you can put your hands on guys you don't know, cause you're alpha..
(****s up his whole 'look cool' game, because you've characterized all his manneurisms, so anything he does to look alpha makes him appear to be qualifying himself too you.. if he continues, just say "see... alphamale.. whoa tiger, I can't mess")

PUA: dude, you're like Bart Simpson all grown up.. (for guys who pull the college-guy type out alpha on you)

PUA: dude, you're like the Joan Rivers of the club.. I love all the little comments and ****.. (to imply like he does nothing but sits on the sidelines making comments but doesn't take action, so use this on guys who have that characteristic in the club venue)

PUA: That was really good man, you're like a comedian.

OR, if the dude is out-alpha'ing you, keep going until he's TOO into it, and then let him do a bunch of condescending **** on you in a row. Look at the girls like you're bored or sad, and because he's talking TOO MUCH he's therefore qualifying himself to you and losing. Then say to the girls "he's playing the condescention game.. I already won so I stopped now.. who do you guys think won, me or him?" (key is that you looked SAD so the girls start going "awww, he's so sweet", so they'll say you won because they love you now)
For super aggressive AMOGs who try to pick fights

AMOG: blah blah..
PUA: Dude, are you pissed that you're rolling with all guys?

AMOG: blah blah
PUA: dude, your all guy crew is so slick man.. where are your girls dude, what happened tonight?

AMOG: let's go outside..
PUA: guy man, I'm with chicks right now.. I'M INTO CHICKS.. I can't get into this experimental kinky **** with you right now, I have my hands full.. (misinterpreting that he was trying to sleep with you, not fight you)

AMOG: blah blah..
PUA: dude, that shirt rocks.. Tommy Hilfiger.. awesome.. man, back in highschool I used to have the one with like all these cool stripes on it.. it was awesome..

AMOG: fight blah blah..
PUA: guy man, these chicks just told me that they dig you like so bad.. you don't have to fight to prove yourself to them.. they think you're an alphamale dude.. you don't need to try so HARD man.. just BE REAL..

Once you get the guy to qualify himself to you in any way (like he tries to make friends), rather than being nice, IMMEDIATELY cut him out of the circle. Just cut him out. You'll notice trying to SHUT YOUR GAME DOWN by bombarding you with logical questions. They'll start pummeling you with logical stuff, so that you have to answer him the girls fall out of state. For me I found the solution was just to say "hey man, don't get all scientific on me.. we're here to have fun.." and then immediately start gaming the girls again. btw, if I'm out with any of my GFs at a club, and another guy hits on them, I use the same tactics on AMOGS to stop them.

When you cut him out of the circle, he'll either leave (too deflated), or he'll try to grab your shoulder and say something like "don't turn your back on me". From there, the girls think he's creepy, so you say "hey guys, this dude is creepy.. are you friends with this guy?? did YOU bring this guy here?" The girls will say "no no no, we don't know him", and you say "OK, let's get out of here", and put out your arms for them to grab.

Then walk away with the girls on your arms, and if you want (I do this alot) turn around and have them both kiss you on the cheek and wave the AMOG goodbye.

Also, you can USE the AMOG's WORK for yourself. Like he lines 'em up, you knock 'em down.
This is something I do alot. I let a guy pick a girl up and increase her buying temperature, then I go in and outalpha him, say he's creepy to the girls, and then remove them from him.

The girls are already aroused, so they are still in state based on what the AMOG did. I can do this like maybe on 90% of sets I approach where a natural AMOG has gotten far with a girl. I think a dude I know "Stephane" recently posted about this on Cliff's List regarding a sarge we did.
Basically, I just make the friends of the girl who is getting gamed on by the AMOG like me. Like, they want me, but they know they're not qualified but their friend is.

Then I say "Hey I want to meet your friend so much, but that touchy grabby lean in guy is all over her.. is she just being nice, or does she really like guys who lean in and touch and do all the 'whats your name' fake ungenuine stuff?"
The UGs are invariably like "no no, we hate guys like that.. that's why we love you so much blah blah", and then you get the FRIENDS to literally REMOVE the hottie that you want from the AMOG who is conveniently heating her up for you and saving you the hassle.

Most of the time, the AMOG feels immediately beta after such a line!

Hey AMOG, what's up? Are u ill today? You look sick!

Hey AMOG, you look/talk/act strange, do you take drugs?

Hey AMOG, your clothes are really strange!

Hey AMOG, i talked to some people here...
They don't like you, because you seem strange!

Hey you seem tired!

TD

 

[Miles Davis]

Hahah, that's some good **** there, Slickster. thanks for sharing that with us.

 

[drZaius09]

I can't imagine that anyone who wrote that sh1t could possibly have a JOB or any semblance of a LIFE besides picking up sluts at slut clubs. This article should be titled, "How to qualify yourself without looking like you're qualifying yourself." How truly sad.

When you people GROW UP you're going to look back on your life and lament over wasting so many years trying to impress wh0res into dropping their drawers for you. By then it will be too late, and all you'll have is past conquests to reminisce, without any real substance in your life or future to look forward to.

 

[drixsa]

Originally posted by drZaius09
I can't imagine that anyone who wrote that sh1t could possibly have a JOB or any semblance of a LIFE besides picking up sluts at slut clubs. This article should be titled, "How to qualify yourself without looking like you're qualifying yourself." How truly sad.

When you people GROW UP you're going to look back on your life and lament over wasting so many years trying to impress wh0res into dropping their drawers for you. By then it will be too late, and all you'll have is past conquests to reminisce, without any real substance in your life or future to look forward to.

whatever, at least hes an expert at his hobby

 

[Slickster]

Originally posted by drZaius09
I can't imagine that anyone who wrote that sh1t could possibly have a JOB or any semblance of a LIFE besides picking up sluts at slut clubs. This article should be titled, "How to qualify yourself without looking like you're qualifying yourself." How truly sad.

When you people GROW UP you're going to look back on your life and lament over wasting so many years trying to impress wh0res into dropping their drawers for you. By then it will be too late, and all you'll have is past conquests to reminisce, without any real substance in your life or future to look forward to.

drZauis do you ever have anything positive to say? Don't get me wrong I'm not slamming you or anything. I do sense a sarcastic form of humour in many of your posts but come on man...lighten up a little.

As for the above article. It was something I brought over from ASF. Tyler Durden (who used to hang out here I think) wrote it. If you've ever been to ASF you would know that Tyler Durden is worshipped like a God over there. Kind of like Pook here on sosuave.

Its funny though because I feel the same way as you. Tyler Durden (TD) is obviously a guy with way too much time on his hands. This is the difference between ASF and Sosuave. When Pook speaks about seductionists and their techniques I think in large part he's referring to some of the guys over there. They spend way too much time worrying about how to get women and they leave little time for themselves and their own lives.

As a "reader" though, I must say I'm very appreciative for all their hard work and effort they put into the game of seduction. They obviously spend countless hours working on openers, C+F, routines, and techniques. I'm not obsessed with seduction and its techniques like many ASFers but I can easily find some great tips over there. Its fun reading and many of the tips are quite useful.

Like you said though its kind of a "waste of life" getting so involved in it all. Its kind of what makes sites like Sosuave and ASF useful. Some one else can do the grunt work and post about what works. Then at your leisure you can pick and choose what you'd like to use yourself.

 

[THA REALNESS]

Originally posted by drZaius09
I can't imagine that anyone who wrote that sh1t could possibly have a JOB or any semblance of a LIFE besides picking up sluts at slut clubs. This article should be titled, "How to qualify yourself without looking like you're qualifying yourself." How truly sad.

 

[Ricky]

dr Zaius, I spent the majority of my 20's working on my career, but with women I wasn't so good until the last couple years of that decade.

I now have a masters, a reasonable amount of money saved up have held a few pretty darn good jobs.

But no amount of money or anything can change the feeling that I admit I get when I see guys that are better looking or more alpha than me.

Only by changing the inner game and my mindset can I accomplish this. It is not that I don't feel confident, it is just that I compare myself too much to others. I wanted strategies for this. Some of the guys posted them. This isn't about obsession of any sort.

 

[syemour]

thats ****en money dude....thanks

 

[Lothario]

Ricky,

Nice introspective. But I think you solved your own dilemma: get to the bar early and mark your territory.

But I know where you are coming from. I have had similar streams of thought. For I'm only 5'8" and that has to be the one drawback to my physique that is most troubling. It often leads to feelings of inferiority etc when a 6'2" 210 muscle man stands next to me. I'm very fit and look good, but I'm short.

No worries, I play the hand dealt to me.

Another strategy is to show up with girls in your group. Whether you're interested in any of them or not, it's sort of a homebase and launchpad for confidence in a male dominated environment.

Also, if you know you're going to be in a situation like that, take extra steps to stand out in a different way. This depends on the venue but can be expressed in different ways: dress exceptionally well (which u should be doing anyway), wear those shoes that are at the edge of your personality, valet park your car, get the best seats in the house, drink something not so common, like a Blue Moon Martini (Bombay Saphire lightened up with Blue Caracao). You have to separate yourself, distinguish yourself from the crowd. And from that distinction you will build your confidence and not worry so much about the mass of alphas swarming about.

Best of luck to you.

 

[Kuen1]

I'm just curious about what happens after you've interupted the guy, insulted him and his friends, his clothes, and called him gay and he decides to split your head open. Maybe this kind of thing works. I'm not sure so I won't say that it's bs or not, but it does not seem to be a smart idea to begin insulting a man who has been drinking all in front of the ladies he is with. Oh well...to each their own.

 

[Ricky]

Yeah insulting guys isn't a good route for anybody. Especially nowadays when it could be a psycho killer. Look what happen to that Reds outfielder. We don't know the whole story yet, but it could have been a bar argument.

 

[drixsa]

Originally posted by Slickster
I did some research for you over at ASF. Credit Tyler Durden for this stuff. If you're unfamiliar with some of the acronyms don't worry they use some different ones over there.

AMOG is Alpha Male Other Guy
PUA is Pick up Artist

This should help if you run into any competition.

AMOG DESTROYERS

The easy way to handle any alpha is to be polite to him, but act disinterested by his rap/accomplishments using tonality/body language (without coming off as patronizing/sarcastic) while simultaneously being charming to others around you. This will drop his perceived value and cause him to qualify himself to try and raise it back up. He can't fight you or do **** like that, and he can't move to insults, because you've been polite and in doing so he would be making himself look VERY BAD. The only tactic vs this is to walk away. If you reward him just enough to encourage further qualifying but not enough to make him feel validated again he will fall into line as beta in relation to you. I blow out rich men in power outfits, top ranking professors in schools, 300lb bouncers, police officers and gangers ALL THE TIME. This **** works - if you do it right they will work VERY HARD to be your friend.


Ultra quick and effective AMOG destroyer

This is just like the JAP Busting stuff, where you say "you're cool", as a way of tricking him to qualify himself to you.

He's stuck, because if he DOES do well, he's qualified himself to you. If he doesn't, he's failed to. The only answer he would have would be to say back to you "hey now, you're cool.. I didn't mean to step on your toes man.. You're a smart guy, keep talking to her and I'll watch and learn man!"..
Of course to that, you could reply, "You just met me and you already say I'm smart and cool? hahah"


More AMOG destroyer

AMOG: How do you guys know eachother?
PUA: Her? I ****ed her.
(Girl will go "aaaaaaaaah... hahahahah, I did NOT!!! But she'll hit you and be giggling and start crawling all over you...).

AMOG: Hey, this is a nice girl.
PUA: Her.. she's a slut..
(Again, girl will start going "nooooo!" while giggling her ass off and crawling on you.. this is very deflating to the guy trying to cut in)

AMOG: Hey girls whats up (or whatever)
PUA: Hey dude dude (putting hands up like you give up).. I will pay you a HUNDRED dollars right now, to take these girls away from me.
(Girls will go "no no no... we love you PUA.. noooooo" and giggle and crawl on you.. Again, immediately deflating to the guy)

AMOG: Hey girls what's up (or whatever)
PUA: Dude, OMG that shirt is AWESOME.. I had one just like it in highschool, it ****ing rocks man.. Having a good time in London man.. It's awesome huh? Dude you're like the coolest guy I met all night.. (patting him on the shoulder)..

AMOG: (showing signs that he wants to fight)
PUA: hahah, dude, are you like trying to pick a fight with me? hahahha.. ok ok hold up hold up.. wait a sec, we'll do even better.. first... we'll have an armwrestling competition.. then second.. we'll do one armed pushups.. and last..... POSE-DOWN!!

(then you start flexing and go "ladies?", and they start saying how you're so strong, and the AMOG looks like a tool.. you're tooling him, by making him seem like he's trying too hard to impress the girls by showing them superiority).

AMOG: Hey man.. keep talking.. no no, let's hear your pitch man.. pick these girls up man, you're doing awesome.
PUA: Hey, you know I've gotta try to impress you COOL (x-city, x-dressed, x-whateverquality) guys.. You guys ****ing ROCK.
(cut him down on whatever limited amount of knowledge you have of him, even if its not relevant whatsoever, he'll feel uncomfortable and his bodylanguage will show it)

AMOG: (starts touching you to show dominance)
PUA: hahhaha, DUUUUDE, I'm not into guys man... dude, there's club-gay-whatever over there man.. hands off the merchandise buddy
(girls laugh at him, then he starts qualifying himself to you that he's not gay)

AMOG: (gets in your face)
PUA: (don't answer.. just SIT there quiet.. the more he says stuff to you, the more he's TRYING.. talking too long without an answer is QUALIFYING yourself.. so if he keeps trying to out-alpha you, and you don't answer, eventually he looks beta because he tried too hard to get your attention.. another trick is to make "let's get out of here" girlcode with your eyes to the girls (mimmick what they do to eachother when you do a bad set), and they'll leave with you)

AMOG: (gets in your face)
PUA: dude, you're an alphamale..
AMOG: what's that..
PUA: you know, like the leader of the pack.. you call the shots.. you can put your hands on guys you don't know, cause you're alpha..
(****s up his whole 'look cool' game, because you've characterized all his manneurisms, so anything he does to look alpha makes him appear to be qualifying himself too you.. if he continues, just say "see... alphamale.. whoa tiger, I can't mess")

PUA: dude, you're like Bart Simpson all grown up.. (for guys who pull the college-guy type out alpha on you)

PUA: dude, you're like the Joan Rivers of the club.. I love all the little comments and ****.. (to imply like he does nothing but sits on the sidelines making comments but doesn't take action, so use this on guys who have that characteristic in the club venue)

PUA: That was really good man, you're like a comedian.

OR, if the dude is out-alpha'ing you, keep going until he's TOO into it, and then let him do a bunch of condescending **** on you in a row. Look at the girls like you're bored or sad, and because he's talking TOO MUCH he's therefore qualifying himself to you and losing. Then say to the girls "he's playing the condescention game.. I already won so I stopped now.. who do you guys think won, me or him?" (key is that you looked SAD so the girls start going "awww, he's so sweet", so they'll say you won because they love you now)
For super aggressive AMOGs who try to pick fights

AMOG: blah blah..
PUA: Dude, are you pissed that you're rolling with all guys?

AMOG: blah blah
PUA: dude, your all guy crew is so slick man.. where are your girls dude, what happened tonight?

AMOG: let's go outside..
PUA: guy man, I'm with chicks right now.. I'M INTO CHICKS.. I can't get into this experimental kinky **** with you right now, I have my hands full.. (misinterpreting that he was trying to sleep with you, not fight you)

AMOG: blah blah..
PUA: dude, that shirt rocks.. Tommy Hilfiger.. awesome.. man, back in highschool I used to have the one with like all these cool stripes on it.. it was awesome..

AMOG: fight blah blah..
PUA: guy man, these chicks just told me that they dig you like so bad.. you don't have to fight to prove yourself to them.. they think you're an alphamale dude.. you don't need to try so HARD man.. just BE REAL..

Once you get the guy to qualify himself to you in any way (like he tries to make friends), rather than being nice, IMMEDIATELY cut him out of the circle. Just cut him out. You'll notice trying to SHUT YOUR GAME DOWN by bombarding you with logical questions. They'll start pummeling you with logical stuff, so that you have to answer him the girls fall out of state. For me I found the solution was just to say "hey man, don't get all scientific on me.. we're here to have fun.." and then immediately start gaming the girls again. btw, if I'm out with any of my GFs at a club, and another guy hits on them, I use the same tactics on AMOGS to stop them.

When you cut him out of the circle, he'll either leave (too deflated), or he'll try to grab your shoulder and say something like "don't turn your back on me". From there, the girls think he's creepy, so you say "hey guys, this dude is creepy.. are you friends with this guy?? did YOU bring this guy here?" The girls will say "no no no, we don't know him", and you say "OK, let's get out of here", and put out your arms for them to grab.

Then walk away with the girls on your arms, and if you want (I do this alot) turn around and have them both kiss you on the cheek and wave the AMOG goodbye.

Also, you can USE the AMOG's WORK for yourself. Like he lines 'em up, you knock 'em down.
This is something I do alot. I let a guy pick a girl up and increase her buying temperature, then I go in and outalpha him, say he's creepy to the girls, and then remove them from him.

The girls are already aroused, so they are still in state based on what the AMOG did. I can do this like maybe on 90% of sets I approach where a natural AMOG has gotten far with a girl. I think a dude I know "Stephane" recently posted about this on Cliff's List regarding a sarge we did.
Basically, I just make the friends of the girl who is getting gamed on by the AMOG like me. Like, they want me, but they know they're not qualified but their friend is.

Then I say "Hey I want to meet your friend so much, but that touchy grabby lean in guy is all over her.. is she just being nice, or does she really like guys who lean in and touch and do all the 'whats your name' fake ungenuine stuff?"
The UGs are invariably like "no no, we hate guys like that.. that's why we love you so much blah blah", and then you get the FRIENDS to literally REMOVE the hottie that you want from the AMOG who is conveniently heating her up for you and saving you the hassle.

Most of the time, the AMOG feels immediately beta after such a line!

Hey AMOG, what's up? Are u ill today? You look sick!

Hey AMOG, you look/talk/act strange, do you take drugs?

Hey AMOG, your clothes are really strange!

Hey AMOG, i talked to some people here...
They don't like you, because you seem strange!

Hey you seem tired!

TD

what i am interested in is how do you respond to the questions that were just asked

i guess not answering is the only answer...

 

[DYDevotee]

the trick is not to go somewhere where you have a lot of competition and try to compete, thats a rat-race, get her info and get lost. Then in a few days, call her up, and spend time with just her and you.

 

[Walden]

Mods, MODS!

How do we nominate something for the bible around here ?!?!.