Warning LONG POST without a TL/DR
Espi,
I don't necessarily disagree with a lot of what you said and I recognize the different philosophies and approaches. But, I do disagree with your view that sex on the first date is out of the realm of possibility for most men. I have slept with over 100 women met online on first dates over the years..throw in the second date and I would say I sleep with, conservatively, 75% of the women who were ever going to sleep with me by then.
My situation is also not atypical. Many of my friends have similar experiences, though they go out less than I do.
Like you said, if it was so atypical, I would be making millions from my method, but I don't even cover my website hosting/other costs from the few sales of my e-book.
What probably most readers want to know though is how I do it, if indeed they believe that sex on a first date with an online date is uncommon.
So here it is:
(1) A big part of my success has to do with living in NYC. Not going to lie, location matters, and in NYC, sex is easier to get than anywhere I have lived. But this is not the only factor by a long shot. (I lived in Boca Raton for 1.5 years and I still slept with 15-20 from the internet on the first date)
(2) While I am relatively average looking, short and bald, I am in great shape, so that most definitely helps..so there is no doubt that looks/physical attractiveness do matter when it comes to first night lays, however, I will note that online, women already know what you look like, so unless your pictures are very misleading (I do not recommend pictures that are "too good" btw), there's a decent chance you have enough attractiveness already to get the 1st night lay.
(3) I go for sex on the first date -- A lot of men don't get sex on the first date because they don't go for it. There is almost no downside in trying to get sex on the first date as long as you aren't creepy about it. There is plenty of upside, assuming you like sex of course
What do I mean by go for it?
I mean escalating aggressively with eye contact and kino escalation. Not creepy, but I err on the side of too much kino versus too little. I've been called out a few times, but it's rarely mattered if she liked me, and if she didn't like me, it wouldn't matter anyways.
(For example, I f-closed a girl from tinder on a 2nd date while in miami for a conference (first date was an hour meet and greet in between some meetings I had) and she blatantly called me out for being so touchy. I told her I was always like this and then made fun of her about it (I would go touch her and then pull back and say something like: "OH WAIT I FORGOT, SORRY, I FORGOT I CAN'T TOUCH YOU UH OH!!"..anyway, back to the main topic)
Secondly, I am not afraid to invite her over. I play instruments, so my main go to is want to come up and hear some piano/guitar/whatever. I say it casually and if I sense any hesitation (or sometimes preemptively) I qualify with a false time constraint. For example: "Well, I'm going to pass out in a little bit, but want to come hear some piano for a bit before you head home?"
Many men are afraid that they will ruin it with a girl for being too forward:
This almost never happens If she likes you but isn't ready yet, she'll just say she has to head home and you say ok cool, some other time. You will almost never scare someone off by inviting them over.
(4) Logistics
This is one of the most important steps. I set up logistics to make it as easy as possible to f-close on the first date. This is where being in NYC is a huge advantage (easy to arrange a date literally a 10 second walk from your place) but a city isn't the only spot.
Some critical logistical points:
(1) Arrange dates at good times. I find the ideal date time is 8pm. This is too late a time for her to arrange anything after your date, but not too late that she will be too tired after an hour and a half to two hours.
(2) Make it as easy as possible to get back to a sex location -- whether it is your place or her place, make it EASY. If you can, always arrange a date walking distance from a sex location. This is not always feasible depending where you live, and that does make things much harder if you live in the suburbs but there are still techniques that can help.
For example, try to control the driving if you can. She may be hesitant to have you pick her up (though you'd be surprised how many girls are ok with this) but a good idea that works well is to have her park at your place and then you guys go to the venue together. You can make this happen by cleverly arranging your location to be such that your house is on the way from her house to the place. It doesn't always work, but you should try to make this happen to increase your odds of a first date lay.
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(5) Attract, Attract, Attract
In my opinion, by far the most important part of seduction is the attraction phase. Don't settle for "just enough attraction", keep attracting her and attracting her even once you think she already likes you. For her to sleep with you on a first date she doesn't just have to like you, she has to REALLY like you, and really like you in a sexual way.
A lot of guys COULD get there on a first date, but instead they choose to rest on their laurels and they stop DHV'ing, start getting too comfortable, ease up on the kino escalation (when they should be ramping it up) and the likes.
Whole books can be written (and have been) about how to turn women on and attract them so that's just too much for an already long post, but the key point here is "don't stop attracting". There is never "like you enough" or "think you are of enough value" if you want to get quick, early lays. More is better. I wrote about this technique which I call "Value Overloading" on my site in more detail.
A Note on How to get her to your place
This is really a common sticking point. I wrote an article about it on my site (search: tricks your place) but here's one I like, I call it planting seeds:
For me, the seed is music, I bring up the instruments I play to have that in their mind and then circle back to that at the end of the date. For you it can be something as simple as a cool youtube video "that you just can't capture on a 4.7" iphone6 screen" to some paintings in your house. This is an easy way to segue into getting her over if you aren't comfortable just asking her to come over at the end of the date.
A note on making her comfortable so early in the process
One very powerful technique I like to use to make her comfortable enough to sleep with me so early on is what I call "assuming continuity" I wrote about it on my site (search for "continuity").
The basic concept is to inject statements that suggest that you already see you guys hanging out a bunch in the future. An example would be:
You: "I went to this great sushi restaurant the other day."
Her: "Awesome, I love sushi, where is it?"
You: "It's XYZ...I'm a huge sushi lover as well, we'll go there sometime."
That's a sneaky little trick which is surprisingly powerful at making her comfortable you aren't going to just hit it and quit it, which is one of the big reasons girls do not sleep with a guy they like on the first date.
Hope this helps
EDIT: Oh, and one more tip ... you would be surprised how many women will agree to come to your place for THE FIRST DATE. You have to usually plant a seed to get there (my seed for that is board games), and it isn't a method you can count on, but I have had at least a dozen first dates at [EDIT: my or her] place... all but one ended in an f-close and that was because I was not attracted to the girl. Granted, most women who agree to this are already thinking that if you live up to what they expect they will sleep with you, but hey, you'd be surprised at how many of those women there are!
