Clingy plate that's HOT!

[latinnova]

So I recently just hooked up with this one plate that threw it on me the first night we went out. She was super aggressive and great in bed, she is super hot to me (not gonna play the HB game, she's just fing hot) but when we got done being all hot and heavy she asked "promise me you won't hurt me." I responded by not promising and simply asked if she enjoyed this moment, she said yes, and I said that is all we need, to enjoy our moments together and let things develop how they will.

But she keeps texting things like "you make my heart melt and it scares me because I get hurt in relationships.."

Anyhow, she is the first clinger plate I have had. How should I proceed? I don't want to get into a LTR at all, and she knows it, but keeps on pressing. If I straight out say "Listen, this will not be a LTR.", I know I will probably not be tapping that again, but also I don't want to be a arsehole and just string her along. She has young kids and that is the main reason I don't want a LTR.

If she wasn't one of the hottest plates I have I would just forget her and move on. But I love that piece of @ss. So what words of wisdom do you Don's have on this?

 

[GS750]

Oh needy clinger for sure. She thinks that by sleeping with you she's gonna rope you into a relationship, which is what clingers do obviously. You're gonna have to eject like Pairs said. No way around it.

 

[El Payaso]

This one is damaged goods. Tread carefully.

 

[Tictac]

V. Adhere to the golden ratio

Give your woman 2/3 of everything she gives you. For every three calls or texts, give her two back. Three declarations of love earn two in return. Three gifts; two nights out. Give her two displays of affection and stop until she has answered with three more. When she speaks, you reply with fewer words. When she emotes, you emote less. The idea behind the golden ratio is twofold — it establishes your greater value by making her chase you, and it demonstrates that you have the self-restraint to avoid getting swept up in her personal dramas. Refraining from reciprocating everything she does for you in equal measure instills in her the proper attitude of belief in your higher status. In her deepest loins it is what she truly wants.

Roissy's Fifth Commandment of Poon

 

[skinnyguy]

BPD who is getting worse. Make sure your penis is in her mouth more than 50% of the time you're with her or else you'll go crazy.

 

[stevo]

This is a similar situation that made me create the "how do you treat your plates" thread so she knows presently she's only a plate, nothing more.

What I've done in my situation is:

Do not do what boyfriends do, try as much as possible not to get involved in her personal life. Let it all be about seks

Do not send just checking in messages. If you initiate convo it should be about next time you're getting down together.

Do not see her more than twice a week, any week, even if her body is sugar and honey. Remember anything more than twice a week is gf status.

Do not stop meeting women

Try not to confess feelings or make her think she's so special to you.

Unless she plainly asks you the what are we qxtn, let your actions show her you're only having fun and that's all you have to offer right now.

Oh and do not take out the excitement from it by telling her "this won't turn to a LTR", let her continue to dream you might one day be a thing, really no one knows and you can't control what she decides to tell her self, what you can do is not validate anything.

 

[pumpkin-head]

Hot isn't worth having a crazy girl who can be a detriment later on.

 

[latinnova]

Thank's fellows. Went over there again last night and scored once again, why are the crazy ones the best ones in bed? She seemed a little more mellow and wasn't talking all that jibber jabber this time. So I will tap it a couple of more times, and if she starts pressuring again I will slowly fade into oblivion...

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

But she keeps texting things like "you make my heart melt and it scares me because I get hurt in relationships.."

Sounds like over-commitment issues on her part; hence she feels hurt by her partners' inability to be everything she wants them to be: i.e. the solitary facet of her existence.

I have had very clingy chicks and there is a common question that needs addressing - what else do they have going on in their life other than you? Hobbies, friends, sports, pass times, a job that fulfils them? Family also comes in to this as well, but only to an extent. It has occurred to me (through experience) that individuals who rely too heavily on family for attention are seeking the same validation as those who are heavily reliant on a partner. There is something deeper and more emotional going on, for sure. It's not natural.

She's probably 'been hurt' (read, feels hurt) because she hasn't had her fairy tale princess expectations and blue-pill dreams realised yet.

As has been said, be wary. Lovingly clingy can turn in to neurotically controlling very quickly if you aren't towing the line to the rule.

 

[Starfvcks 64]

V. Adhere to the golden ratio

Give your woman 2/3 of everything she gives you. For every three calls or texts, give her two back. Three declarations of love earn two in return. Three gifts; two nights out. Give her two displays of affection and stop until she has answered with three more. When she speaks, you reply with fewer words. When she emotes, you emote less. The idea behind the golden ratio is twofold — it establishes your greater value by making her chase you, and it demonstrates that you have the self-restraint to avoid getting swept up in her personal dramas. Refraining from reciprocating everything she does for you in equal measure instills in her the proper attitude of belief in your higher status. In her deepest loins it is what she truly wants.

Roissy's Fifth Commandment of Poon

2/3rds? I thought it was 1/5th...

For texts i'll go 2/3rds, but for $ it's a strict 1/5th policy.

 

[GS750]

But she keeps texting things like "you make my heart melt and it scares me because I get hurt in relationships.."

Sounds like over-commitment issues on her part; hence she feels hurt by her partners' inability to be everything she wants them to be: i.e. the solitary facet of her existence.

I have had very clingy chicks and there is a common question that needs addressing - what else do they have going on in their life other than you? Hobbies, friends, sports, pass times, a job that fulfils them? Family also comes in to this as well, but only to an extent. It has occurred to me (through experience) that individuals who rely too heavily on family for attention are seeking the same validation as those who are heavily reliant on a partner. There is something deeper and more emotional going on, for sure. It's not natural.

She's probably 'been hurt' (read, feels hurt) because she hasn't had her fairy tale princess expectations and blue-pill dreams realised yet.

As has been said, be wary. Lovingly clingy can turn in to neurotically controlling very quickly if you aren't towing the line to the rule.

Yep, the clingers make you the center of their universe and they are painfully insecure. They need to be in a relationship with someone and will do/say whatever they need to get into one. The super clinger that I dated, I got the feeling that she was more into the idea of a realtionship than she was into me. They latch onto someone because they cannot be alone. I'd eject OP. Don't be surprised if she doesn't take the hint too easily though.

 

[_sideways_]

How are all these DJs scared of being hurt?
She cant hurt you if ur emotionally mature...she cant beat u up...she cant do shyt...

She cant make you fall in love...she cant break ur heart.

This should be one of 5 hot azzes you should be having fun with.

Keep her, dont give her money, go workout, go to work, read the bible, hang with friends....what is there to be worried about?

 

[GS750]

I don't know if I'd call it "hurt". More "major pain in the ass that isn't worth the hassle in the long run" is a better way to describe dealing with a major clinger.

 

[latinnova]

Thanks for the insight sideways. I was thinking along the same lines of the advice you gave and get it while it is good and drop it if it gets too be too much to put up with. She is crazy in bed and the greatest lay that I have at the moment (same rhythm, she's a gusher, screamer, blah blah.. everything that's good). I am not scared at all of being hurt, by no means, just having to deal with a clingers sh!t and wanted to see what all the other Don's do when it comes to this situation.

 

[_sideways_]

Gushers are the best....enjoy it...

Clingy aint nothing but a thing...imagine she had an std, thats real worry.

Shes a big girl, she knows if she gets too anniying for you, or too much for ur dislike, that u will drop her like a bad habit.

This is one hb out of the next ones...

You say youre having a blast...enjoy it and dont think negatively and ruin ur good fortune.

In fact, show her ur the man and keep her around for the.next 5 yrs. Only you can break and tame ur beast...fvck what the world says about a "difficult" girl.

 

[El Payaso]

Thanks for the insight sideways. I was thinking along the same lines of the advice you gave and get it while it is good and drop it if it gets too be too much to put up with. She is crazy in bed and the greatest lay that I have at the moment (same rhythm, she's a gusher, screamer, blah blah.. everything that's good). I am not scared at all of being hurt, by no means, just having to deal with a clingers sh!t and wanted to see what all the other Don's do when it comes to this situation.

That's what happens. You get over confident and think you can't get hurt but be careful. They give you the best sex early on to get a grip on you. Before her and early on, you have nothing to lose because you're not really invested yet. One she has fully dug her hooks in you with sex, she will take it away at a whim and you'll start to miss it. You'll start to confuse missing her for having feelings for her. You'll slowly start to bend over to make her happy.

Not saying it will happen to you but be on high alert. BPD women are highly effective at making their target feel comfortable and relaxed. They'll literally worship the ground you work on before turning on you and making you feel like scum and dirt.

Just be careful.

 

[Between_The_Lines]

That's what happens. You get over confident and think you can't get hurt but be careful. They give you the best sex early on to get a grip on you. Before her and early on, you have nothing to lose because you're not really invested yet. One she has fully dug her hooks in you with sex, she will take it away at a whim and you'll start to miss it. You'll start to confuse missing her for having feelings for her. You'll slowly start to bend over to make her happy..

This right here.

I made (forced) a godd@mn relationship out of a plate who gave me the best sex of my life and I wound up systematically destroying any trace of dignity and self respect I once had in order to keep her @ss on tap. From experience, the best way to handle situations like this are to make it abundantly clear that you are not looking for anything serious from the very beginning. Set the casual frame early on and put the onus on them to buy into it or not.

 

[Zarky]

Opie, the ones who tell you about all the hurt they've suffered are usually the ones who will cause you to hurt in the end.