Vulpine
Master Don Juan
I've been on a rampage since reading about some woman's "pay the bill" test. This chick will not see a guy, no matter what, if he doesn't pay the bill on the first date. She used the term "chivalry" in the body of explanation.
The wheels started to turn, and I pondered all that I've ever know about chivalry. My brain recounted the history and evolution of chivalry. My army experience tought me that the salute and handshake evolved from knights passing on roads. They would raise their right hands to show that they had no hostile intentions. Being that the right hand was sword hand, they demonstrated that they weren't reaching for their sword. Chivalry initially started as warrior codes of conduct!
Then, I recalled that "chivalry" morphed into "being a gentleman" and was popularized in an era when woman wore whale-bone corsets, hoop dresses, and travelled in horse drawn carriages. It was actually hard for women to move, and it was considered to be gracious to aid these ladies in difficult movements - otherwise they would pass out from the constriction. Opening doors, stooping, bending, reaching and exertion in general were difficult when strapped into a corset. Chamber pots were emptied from windows into the streets, and men were gentlemen for walking in harms way. Furthermore, there were highwaymen and robbers that women needed protection from. And finally, women didn't have jobs. They had no money to speak of with which to buy their own things. When you consider these things, it's easy too understand and act "chivalrous".
Now, consider all that we see and discuss here. Consider the femanization of our society. My brain, at this point, starts to fry. I have never had a woman stay in the car and wait for me to come around and help her out. I have never had a woman pause and wait at a door for me to open it for her. And, I have never had a woman offer her hand/arm when crossing the street or going up stairs. Where before I bought into the idea that women might have a valid grievance, I finally started to see the hustle. The modern woman must first act like a lady before she can be treated like a lady.
I am hard pressed to recall a date where a woman actually showed up in heels and a dress. When she got out of the car before me and opened the door for me... where exactly was my opportunity to be a gentleman? Indeed, modern women are not ladies.
And, in a conversation I had this weekend with a girl I know, the topic came up. She has always been a pedestal rider, and I never found a good angle to break her down with. But this was a hot topic for her, so I let her rant and rave for quite some time. All the while I was nodding, agreeing with her points, etc. When she finally let out enough rope... it was my turn to respond. I started off by asking her, "Do you think you are a lady?" "Yes." then "Do you honestly feel you knew more about how a gentleman should act than I do?" Needless to say, I tied the noose in her rope and kicked her pedestal out from under her with great ease. As she sat with her mouth open in disbelief, I thought I noticed something in her that I never saw before... an IL?
Gentleman, before you start unleashing the fury of men scorned with this tidbit, do some serious study and observation. Next time you are at a restaurant, note how many women are seated by their dates, how many are assisted with their coats, and how many women would have deserved such treatment. You'll come up with a lot of zeros... unless you should happen to witness an elderly couple - pay close attention! The elderly are miraculous to watch in this regard. They walk down the street arm in arm with the man on the building side. See if you get to watch them get into a vehicle... such grace!
As far as DJ skills go, chivalry is a gem. And, in our push/pull, give/take away, and value determination, knowing lady/gentleman interaction rules is a huge ace in the hole.
I'm interested to hear other perspectives on this traditional behavior and how you guys have worked it into your "routines".
The wheels started to turn, and I pondered all that I've ever know about chivalry. My brain recounted the history and evolution of chivalry. My army experience tought me that the salute and handshake evolved from knights passing on roads. They would raise their right hands to show that they had no hostile intentions. Being that the right hand was sword hand, they demonstrated that they weren't reaching for their sword. Chivalry initially started as warrior codes of conduct!
Then, I recalled that "chivalry" morphed into "being a gentleman" and was popularized in an era when woman wore whale-bone corsets, hoop dresses, and travelled in horse drawn carriages. It was actually hard for women to move, and it was considered to be gracious to aid these ladies in difficult movements - otherwise they would pass out from the constriction. Opening doors, stooping, bending, reaching and exertion in general were difficult when strapped into a corset. Chamber pots were emptied from windows into the streets, and men were gentlemen for walking in harms way. Furthermore, there were highwaymen and robbers that women needed protection from. And finally, women didn't have jobs. They had no money to speak of with which to buy their own things. When you consider these things, it's easy too understand and act "chivalrous".
Now, consider all that we see and discuss here. Consider the femanization of our society. My brain, at this point, starts to fry. I have never had a woman stay in the car and wait for me to come around and help her out. I have never had a woman pause and wait at a door for me to open it for her. And, I have never had a woman offer her hand/arm when crossing the street or going up stairs. Where before I bought into the idea that women might have a valid grievance, I finally started to see the hustle. The modern woman must first act like a lady before she can be treated like a lady.
I am hard pressed to recall a date where a woman actually showed up in heels and a dress. When she got out of the car before me and opened the door for me... where exactly was my opportunity to be a gentleman? Indeed, modern women are not ladies.
And, in a conversation I had this weekend with a girl I know, the topic came up. She has always been a pedestal rider, and I never found a good angle to break her down with. But this was a hot topic for her, so I let her rant and rave for quite some time. All the while I was nodding, agreeing with her points, etc. When she finally let out enough rope... it was my turn to respond. I started off by asking her, "Do you think you are a lady?" "Yes." then "Do you honestly feel you knew more about how a gentleman should act than I do?" Needless to say, I tied the noose in her rope and kicked her pedestal out from under her with great ease. As she sat with her mouth open in disbelief, I thought I noticed something in her that I never saw before... an IL?
Gentleman, before you start unleashing the fury of men scorned with this tidbit, do some serious study and observation. Next time you are at a restaurant, note how many women are seated by their dates, how many are assisted with their coats, and how many women would have deserved such treatment. You'll come up with a lot of zeros... unless you should happen to witness an elderly couple - pay close attention! The elderly are miraculous to watch in this regard. They walk down the street arm in arm with the man on the building side. See if you get to watch them get into a vehicle... such grace!
As far as DJ skills go, chivalry is a gem. And, in our push/pull, give/take away, and value determination, knowing lady/gentleman interaction rules is a huge ace in the hole.
I'm interested to hear other perspectives on this traditional behavior and how you guys have worked it into your "routines".