Chick went from hot to cold in a matter of days.

[WillieSacks]

Maybe you guys can help me figure out where I went wrong b/c this has been bugging me for the past 3 days. I'll break it down week by week.

1st Week

Chick comes to my apartment with a friend, we hit it off, cuddle (no kiss) and I get her number. We go out that weekend for Ice cream, we chill at my apt, she has to be home by midnight, so far so good. I convince her to sneak out of her house on Sunday to come to my apt to keep me company, we cuddle, chill for a while and I have to get her home for school b4 her mom gets up and catches her.

2nd Week

We go out for dinner and a movie over the weekend, Good date, were all holding hands during the movie, lots of Kino, Kiss at end of date, I ask her to come to my place but she has to be home by 1.

We talk to each other almost everyday and I missed a couple of bomb opportunities to get laid which I'm kicking myself for now. 4 example, she calls me and tells me to come over to her house at 8 (turns out her mom and sis are out of town and I could have hit it there) Anyway my night was planned to get something to eat adn workout so I go over to her crib where one of her guy friends (nothing going on, trust me) are at and we shoot the breeze outside for a while before I decided to bail. She wanted me to stay but I said I'd call her after I worked out (BIG MISTAKE) b/c I called her at around 12 after my workout and she was asleep. Damn.

She comes over to my place with her g/f whose b/f is my roomate and we chill for a while until her g/f leaves and the b/f falls asleep. We then proceed to make out for about 5 minutes before the anti slut defenses kick ina nd she has to be home by 12.

We don't hang out during the weekend, instead she does her thing and goes clubbing while I chilled for the weekend. She fininshes clubbing at around 4 in the morning and calls my cell, she was really drunk btw. Maybe I was too naive to figure out that it was a booty call and I told her to get some sleep b/c she ws fukked up. Dope.

Week 4

We make plans to go out on the weekend, we go out, eat, she introduced me to her mom, we meet up with a couple of her friends at a party. We all decide to ditch the party and go to her place.


It's around 2 in the morning, her g/f and one of her guy friends are playing around (not fooling around) on the couch, us two are cuddled up watching a movie, I then proceed to move the covers over our faces and start making out with her, she seemed to enjoy it and her sister calls her from upstairs reminding ehr that she had to get up at 7 for a soccer game, so she gets up and goes upstairs for a second. Her 2 friends excuse themselves and they go home, she then comes downstairs and we start making out and but her brother is coming over so I have to go. THis was Friday.

I call her up Saturday & Sunday and just talk to her for a second.

I call her up Monday no answer, Tuesday, no answer, she calls me on Wednesday and I tell her to call me back b/c I was a sleep, no call back, I call her on Thursday, she picks up and gives me a lame excuse, like she's eating and she'll call back, no call back.

Haven't heard from her since.

WTF just happened.

 

[WillieSacks]

I think I've got it figured out. I know where I went wrong.

1.) I called her too much, even though she called me also, I didn't necesarily need to talk to her almost everyday so I'm gonna take some time off. Only call to hook up, no more calls just to talk.

2.) I didn't f**k her asap BUT I tried but $hit just kept happening. For example, her mom is strict and wants her home by 12, one time I was making out with her at 11:45 but she had to go home so we stopped. The other time, we were making out but her older brother was coming home and I had to leave b/c her brother wouldn't have liked that.

3.) No more text messaging.

4.) Let her do her thing and stop checking up on her. I did this a couple of times and I need to stop.

A few more but I already know where I messed up and my head is now clear, I just hope she calls my stupid ass back after all the mistakes I realized I made. Peace.

 

[violator]

I think you know what went wrong but need someone to confirm your suspicions:

1. You did not hit it when you were given the green light. I have been there and done that and have learned my lesson well. When a girl offers you privacy whether it be at her place or yours, or otherwise gives you clear signals, this is womanize for fyck me now or forever hold your peace.

She gave you several opportunities, but you let it pass thereby reducing your sexual value to nil. You essentially immasculated yourself by not fycking her. This is a common AFC mistake. Sometimes we are afraid of our own successes, in this case you had her alone on several occassions but did not consumate the deal.

For future purposes, never believe the crap that you hear from women or self proclaimed relationship experts that you should go slow with women. That could only lead you to losing the girl and further heartache. The sooner you nail her the better.

2. You came on too strong in the end. By calling her 4 days in a row, you showed signs of desparation, thereby becoming less of a challenge to her.

3. You came off as a game player or tease. This is another possibility. For example your description fits a scenario I had with this one HB, but in reverse. We would get together, but she would always act kind of cold and not want to put out. Eventually, I got sick of her c0ckteasing games and nexted her. She came crawling back, calling me successively, but I had already lost interest and found another girl.

This may also apply in your situation. She got sick of your perceived gameplaying and found someone else.

 

[WillieSacks]

I KNOW, I rarely ever come to this site these days and I've been trippin' over the last 3 days but I come here, do a search and find my answers in 5 minutes. I can't believe I fukked this $hit up. I'm just hoping I can get this back on track. Hopefully she calls back and if she brings up what I wanted to talk about. I'll just say. "Oh, I was just wondering if you and your girl were still going to go to the club with me and my boy over the weekend" b/c at first I wanted to talk about the whole "where is this going" shtick but I haven't even had sex with her yet.

If she doesn't call back, It's all good b/c I've learned my lesson.

I called waaayyyy tooo much. But I DID try to f**k her, it just didn't happen, and I wasn't afraid of my successes I just wasn't thinking with my dyck, and I just figured out where I messed up afterwards. I don't think I was playing games as you say though. I just missed a couple of opportunities and ended up acting desperate in the end b/c the last 2 times I was alone with her I tried to escalate it.

DAMN MAN, I'm really upset that I didn't bang her when her mom was gone. Silly me. B/c when I was there, and we were all talking, I even said, "well I'm gonna go get something toeat then workout", she was all like, "your leaving? well, what are you doing afterwards.....well ummmmm, your working out, that's it? Um Ok, call me after you work out.

Me: Are you still gonna be up

Her: yeah.

She ended up falling asleep when I called her around 12 or so.

I should have said, well I'm gonna get something to eat and come right back and hang out wth you. Silly me.

Not to mention that I could have banged her when I convinced her to sneak out of the house on the 3rd nite I met up with her.
MAN I HOPE SHE CALLS BACK SO I CAN REVERSE THIS


I already know what my response will be. I'm gonna say.

"Wassup girl, sorry I was bothering you during the week but I just really needed to know what was up with Saturday b/c my homeboy really wanted to meet up with your home girl so we could all go clubbing together (we all talked about this last week so It could work) and he was telling me to figure out what was up with you all. We ended up going clubbing afterwards but me and my homeboy wanted to see what was up with ya'll"

THIS WILL WORK, but she just needs to call back. Even though I was actually calling to figure out why she was acting all cold towards me, I already know why and I'm not going to bring that up b/c it reeks of desperation. I'll keep you posted on if she calls back

otherwise

I missed out on a good piece of ass.

 

[becker]

I hope you don't plan on using "homeboy" and "homegirl". Two thumbs down on that part...

Did you ever consider that maybe on those weekends where she went clubbing alone with her friends that she might have met someone else? To me, weekends are the time when you guys should be together if any time. Forget weekdays, too much going on and you always have to worry about the next day.

 

[WillieSacks]

True, true, true. I just hope I get to talk to her by Wednesday b/c if I do, I know I can reverse this.

 

[Clint Eastwood]

Willie, Relax man. You've already lost this girl. Don't bother with her anymore, because you're not going to get her back. Don't be so hard on yourself either.

The best thing you can take away from this is that you know what you did wrong. You're better now because of it. You gained some valuable knowledge and experience. With that, comes more confidence with women. And, we all know what confidence does for your success with women.

Your best move would be to use the fact that this chick dumped for motivation. It's not her fault she's too dumb to recognize what a great guy you are. Get psyched and go out and get some phone numbers. Of course, you'll get some more rejections, but you'll have a lot of success, too.

Maybe, when this girl sees how many other women are chasing you, she'll come crawling back. But, don't count on it. Even if she does, do you really think you'll still want her when you have so many other girls to chose from?

 

[WillieSacks]

This is so fukking funny.

I got some news from an 'inside source'. She started acting all flakey b/c she got back with her ex bf.

I had no control over that, but she's trying to run game on me though.

I talked to her today and she said that were still cool and she still wanted to kick it but hasn't been able to talk to me b/c of soccer (she plays soccer in school) or whatever so I said I was gonna go over to her house and see her and she told me to call, I called and she didn't pick up.


I guess it turns out that, and this is what I guessed at first, after the day that I saw her, she went out and saw her ex bf on the street even though they didn't say anything to each other, I figured that he called her ass up and they went out and are still together. But she's not telling me that, if I ask her, she says something like "hell no, he's my ex for a reason, bla,bla,bla"

Whatever biitch.

I sent her a text after I couldnt get a hold of her saying

"damn, I got dissed again....well have fun with your ex"

 

[jakethasnake]

You did good. If you're hurt in some way, it's not healthy to just completely ignore your emotions like some DJs tell you to. To hurt is to be human, you've gotta let it sink it. Whoever tells you to immediate 'NEXT!' and go hunting the very next day either have no experience themselves or are full of shyt. Take your time, but be very careful to not fall in the trap of DWELLING. That is unhealthy.


Then you take a deep breath and move on. Good luck man.

 

[Kodiac]

Sounds like a situation i have been through, i reacted the same way and the biatch called me Melodramatic and all these long arsed names i had to look up lol
I also had 2 chances to score with this chick and i fuked them up... NEVER AGAIN! If there's a chance to score, take it, don't take thing's slow -if there an opening, go in

2 relationships after that one and i finally found the bible.
She sounds like another attention wh*re to me - like most of them. She got back with her EX ?? She's made her choice.

Don't waist anymore time on this one. I wouldn't bother replying to any of her text's nor answer any phone calls. If i ran into her i'd act polite / friendly - but keep it brief as ur busy.

Take it as a lesson learnt, NEXT, and find someone better!
Biatches.

 

[WillieSacks]

Thanks for the heads up fellas.

Another reason why it's so funny though is b/c around the second week while I was talking to her, she was acting flakey for a couple of days and my roomate told me that it's b/c she's probably messing with her ex bf. My roomates brothers g/f is good friends with her and told him. So I asked her if she was messin' with her ex and she assured me that she wasn't and proceeded to get pissed off at her for saying that. She also told me that the girl was just trying to be a player.


Apparently her ex-bf just calls her for booty calls b/c he has a g/f and she's been trying to break it off but I guess she still has feelings for him and when she saw him over the weekend, those feelings came back.

I heard you say that I shouldn't pick up if she calls. I think I may have a little fun and pick up and see if I can turn this into a booty call if she calls.

I'll say something like, 'so do you want to mess around' and see what she says.

 

[WillieSacks]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
. Whoever tells you to immediate 'NEXT!' and go hunting the very next day either have no experience themselves or are full of shyt.

Thank you Jake, I know people say that NEXT b/s but it wasn't that easy b/c it was eating at me at how she could just turn on me like that. I got 2 numbers over the weekend but this was still on my mind. Now that I know what happened, I feel A LOT better, thanks.

 

[Kodiac]

I'll say something like, 'so do you want to mess around' and see what she says.

Do what you must, experience is the best way too learn.

The only reason i was saying not to pick up if she calls / next her is that u were giving me the impression that you were developing a case of oneitis over this girl. NEXTing her and finding someone worthy sounded like the best option.

And the best way to get over oneitis ? Get out, date more chicks!then u'll find urself saying "wtf was i thinking".

Make sure there's other potentials on ur list cause sure as sh*t this one's a whole lot of trouble.

Make sure you don't find urself getting emotionally involved with someone like her.

No expectation's, No dissapointments.

Good luck

 

[violator]

Now you know why she went back to her ex. The guy is probably a loser but was nailing her like a jack hammer. No matter how ugly or poor a guy is if he gives a girl good sex, she will come back for more.

The best way to "keep" a girl is to give her good sex plain and simple.

Don't sweat it. At least you learned from your mistakes.

I agree with Kodiak. If she starts calling you, don't compleltely avoid her and just act polite. But, make her aware that you are over her and dating/interested in other girls.

 

[thissucks003]

Treat her the way she wants or expects to be treated. Now that you know what works on her(ie: her boyfriend treats her as a booty call), you now have your game plan.

Have fun!

TS

 

[Jake Steed]

Yes, I agree, you should have fvcked her ASAP. That was definately a big mistake.

However, I think you are overanalyzing the whole "challenge" thing. Fact is, if a girl IS REALLY INTERESTED, she will give you a lot of leeway in terms of "fvcking up". For example, a girl who's really interested isn't going to magically lose interest just because you called her 3 times instead of 1. On the other hand, if you keep coming back after she dissed you, you WILL turn her off for good.

Take a look at how you're acting right now. You are STILL acting like a biitch. You are constantly thinking about her and how you can salvage SOMETHING from this. You are formulating plans on what you're going to say to her next when you call her. Trust me, dude, when you call her again, you're going to get no answer. She is NOT interested.

What happened in this case is she had mild interest in you, and was using you as a stand in to help her get over her ex. Your girl still parties and goes to clubs (and meets guys there). Believe me, when a girl meets a guy she really likes, the club scene magically becomes the dirtiest place in the world. A girl in love usually gives up the club scene.

So you want to make her your booty call? Here's the thing about booty calls, she has to be REALLY attracted to you. You have to REALLY turn her on. Think of it like this: She has to have 200 SEXUAL IL in you for her to agree to booty call terms. When a girl has casual sex, she faces EXTREME social ridicule. People will call her a slut. This is every girl's worst nightmare. In order for a girl to agree to booty call,

1. She has to be turned on so much she forgets about what society will think. AND she has to feel safe. She has to feel like there is NO chance for anybody to know about it.

2. Or she has to have fvcked you before. Once you've fvcked a girl, the doors are wide open. If you are good, she feels comfortable with you and knows she can come back for more and she'll get treated right (she'll get off good. nobody will find out).

There are a lot of other complications surrounding booty calls, but I will not get into them here right now.

The bottom line is it's over with this girl. There is nothing you can do at this point. Calling her in two weeks is going to be like trying to re-light a dead fire that's soaking wet. Having her agree to booty call terms is LESS likely than getting her to agree to be your actual girlfriend. I would suggest forgetting her.

Jake

 

[WillieSacks]

I guess that's that. THanks for the quick reply Jake.

 

[WillieSacks]

Looks like it was just a rumor. She didn't go back to her ex and we're talking again. Funny how things work out. At least now I have a better grasp of the game with her.

Jake, I think all this would have been true if she DID get back with her ex but it was just a rumor and she seemed upset when I asked her about it. I guess I overreacted b/c I thought she went back to her ex but that ain't the case.

 

[R6rcr]

How do you know it was a rumor?? I would still be suspect of her earlier actions. I would still also be looking for other chicks, b/c next week it will probably be something else.

 

[WillieSacks]

Well I got a couple of numbers but I just didn't feel like spending money on other chicks b/c it looks like I've been getting burned lately so I took my homeboys advice of just calling the girls on Fri/Sat night to see if they're at parties or clubs and hook up there but regarding this girl, her friends said she's not with her ex and one of her friends is at my apt almost everyday b/c her bf lives here and she said that she hasn't heard or seen her with her ex and this girl already told me what she did that week. I may have just overreacted b/c she didn't call me for 3 DAYS ( I did overreact btw) b/c I came so close to getting some ass and that took over instead of me thinking logically. We're hanging out Thursday afternoon so we'll see what's up. Even though one of my other roomates told me not to trust her though.