Chick Management

[Sir-M]

Hi. this is probably one of the most childish posts on the mature man's forum.. anyway throughout the years reading posts here and finally deciding to join. i think i have turbocharged my Djness.. im so dj i need a p.a. (that rhymes, try it out). i have been getting an overwhelming number of chicks going for me, i just cant manage. i think So suave should offer chick managment lessons after bootcamp.. please please.. it just gotten to the point where i just give my number to girls. cause they number close ME... besides i really couldnt be bothered to try number close anyone i got so much on my plate already, and i dont wanna pull a LJBF stunt, or say "here take a number and join the queue".... im moderately hot.. and chicks that are after me are like 8s and 8.5s and a few 9s (i really dont like rating chicks as high as 9. so lets say 8.9).. i think of myself as a 7. although most think im an 8 or more.. ( i would never put myself as high as 9 too)... okay okay, lets not move too far away from the subject... chick management lessons please.. i turn down enough chicks.. but that looks like its not enough as i thought.. help

 

[Phyzzle]

Don't give your number, take hers.

Yeah I know that's what we say to guys who are trying to get more girls, but really, it goes double for guys in your situation. The last thing you need is some highly motivated 6 or 7 calling you twice a day leaving nasty messages because you're out with 8's and 9's, and you don't feel like answering. Get a business card with email only, if you want to give something out. And try not to let all these girls know where you live until you're pretty sure you like them.

 

[MacAvoy]

Before we can adequately help you we need to know details about your situation. How are the current plates becoming plates? Is it through your network or through cold approaches? What type of activities are you doing with them? Do you take them to parties where there are more plates or do you go on individual dates?

Why do you feel like you can't adequately manage them?

 

[L B]

You need to determine how much on your plate is enough for you. Pritorize who is more important (use the hb rating if that is what you are looking for). I used to rate them based on my overall enjoyment with them.

Prior to my current relationship, I was dating a maximum of 3 girls at a time. More than that, other areas of my life suffers. Last thing you want to do is burn out on dating and having that affect your enjoyment of life.

 

[RedPill]

Get CRM software. Prioritize your relationships and the time/energy you're willing to allocate to them based on your personal value system.

This isn't childish at all. Most guys don't seriously value their time, and therefore can't leverage it to effectively shape their reality.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Get CRM software. Prioritize your relationships and the time/energy you're willing to allocate to them based on your personal value system...

I've been saying this for a long time. I use ACT! but I've told guys to use EssentialPIM because it has freeware version is is a good entry level program.

http://www.essentialpim.com/?r=products&pr=essentialpim

 

[MikeEdward1973]

I've always made the analogy, Match.com = salesforce.com

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I've always made the analogy, Match.com = salesforce.com

You know what would make it even more interesting? If Match added the business focused, social networking aspect of LinkedIn. Imagine bringing up a profile which included information like this:

ReboundGirl_OICU812
Hoboken NJ
Online now!

Member for 35 days

Match-link status

4 contacts made by her as the initiator
87 members contacting her as the recipient
7 active commucations
52 total meetings to date

• 41 members would go out with ReboundGirl_OICU812 again
• 2 members have bedded ReboundGirl_OICU812 to date
• 0 members would bed ReboundGirl_OICU812 again
  

It would then list all of the guys (and girls) she has had contact with and you can play your own 'Six Degrees' like games. You can have conversations with your buds who are on the site, "Dude! I didn't know you were the other guy who got with ReboundGirl! Did you like when she did that thing with her tongue! Ewwwwwwww!!!!"

It could change the concept of online dating for many men. Realistically it would scare even more guys away. Oh well, just a thought, I'm off to the patent office. :yawn:

 

[STR8UP]

This is the downside to "spinning plates".

I don't have the time, energy, or desire to have to put that much effort into keeping track of women.

If I were to actively try to pick up women (not that I don't "pick up women", but I don't go out of my way to do so), I'm sure I could always keep several plates in rotation, but man, keeping up with one or two women is more work than I really care to take on.

 

[RedPill]

This is the downside to "spinning plates".

I don't have the time, energy, or desire to have to put that much effort into keeping track of women.

Like Francisco, I'm also an ACT! user. It's so freaking easy after you learn the basics, and the concept translation from using it for business relationships to using it for women relationships is comparatively simple.

The busier I get with life, the more I realize how inefficient it is to try to remember all the little details about people that are important to them. Add alcohol, noise pollution, and all the other elements of socializing to the mix and it just becomes that much more difficult.

Enter the CRM.

You don't have to be a computer geek or a hospitality professional to jot down things like a chick's favorite drinks, where she's from, her dumb generic stories that are important to her, etc. A lot of the effort of spinning plates is reduced when you don't have to continually see or talk to her to keep the rapport going. In fact, I'd venture as far as to say that the essence of successful plate spinning revolves around maintaining a prolonged, sustained, seemingly effortless rapport.

Then, when you call her every now and then or go out with her, all you have to do is take a quick glance at your notes and commit to short-term memory the details of her. You don't have to expend all this extra time & energy continually getting to know her. You can pick up right where you left off the last time the two of you were together.

On the other side of the coin from maintaining rapport, it gives you the ability to objectively evaluate your plates, well after the chemical rush has been metabolized. Which ones are worth continuing to spin? Which ones are hot and good for social proof but annoy the piss out of you? What features do you really enjoy about this one? Is she sexually enjoyable? Whatever things are important to you about women become the details you track.

Does this objectify women as to their relationship potential? Absolutely. Does it dehumanize the process? Hardly. If anything, utilizing existing technology to more efficiently manage the sex & women part of your life gives one leverage over both their competition and Father Time.

I might even make the argument here that most guys find 'the game' of finding suitable LTR candidates infinitely frustrating because their whole method of seeking out new women relies on a series of chance encounters, temporary feelings, and using serial monogamy as the methodology for contrasting their options.

 

[STR8UP]

See, that might work for an extroverted person, but for someone who does not derive positive energy from constantly being around and in contact with people, it's a different story.

I have to maintain a certain amount of extroversion in my business and social dealings, but at the end of the day it is a CHORE for me to maintain too many relationships at one time, with or without the help of a computer.

This is something that I don't remember being discussed. Maybe it needs a new thread....

 

[MikeEdward1973]

You know what would make it even more interesting? If Match added the business focused, social networking aspect of LinkedIn. Imagine bringing up a profile which included information like this:

ReboundGirl_OICU812
Hoboken NJ
Online now!

Member for 35 days

Match-link status

4 contacts made by her as the initiator
87 members contacting her as the recipient
7 active commucations
52 total meetings to date

• 41 members would go out with ReboundGirl_OICU812 again
• 2 members have bedded ReboundGirl_OICU812 to date
• 0 members would bed ReboundGirl_OICU812 again
  

It would then list all of the guys (and girls) she has had contact with and you can play your own 'Six Degrees' like games. You can have conversations with your buds who are on the site, "Dude! I didn't know you were the other guy who got with ReboundGirl! Did you like when she did that thing with her tongue! Ewwwwwwww!!!!"

It could change the concept of online dating for many men. Realistically it would scare even more guys away. Oh well, just a thought, I'm off to the patent office. :yawn:

Interesting. This got me thinking.

I think that instead CRM software (Customer Relationship Management), we need DRM (Dating Relationship Management software). It would be like ACT or something along those line, but would contain fields that would of course be geared towards dating. Like substitute fields like 'demo' 'trial' and 'contract negotiation' with 'first date' 'dinner' 'activity date,' etc.

And of course, special fields for those leads that close immediately.

 

[RedPill]

I think that instead CRM software (Customer Relationship Management), we need RMM (Relationship Management Software). It would be like ACT or something along those line, but would contain fields that would of course be geared towards dating. Like substitute fields like 'demo' 'trial' and 'contract negotiation' with 'first date' 'dinner' 'activity date,' etc.

ACT can be completely customized, which is why I like it. You can take whatever your relationship management process is and make the software reflect it.

 

[Sir-M]

Phyzzle - "don't give her your number, take hers" - well last month two girls asked me what they gave me their numbers. i was blunt to the one cause i said to her " evidently i haven't had the chance to call you, i only got your number like 2 weeks ago, so back up and i'll call you when im less busy"...

MacAvoy - Well i do Educational consultancy and careers guidance, blah blah, im 25, the current age range of people that come see me is like from 18 -28, give a few years above the 28 occasionaly, but im taking numbers of like 50 or more people a day, and believe me some of them come to ask silly questions.. luckily they dont have to pay, im placed by the government, s meaning one can come everyday to ask me the meaning of education if they wanted to, so they make up questions so they can speak to me.... sigh.. one the other day came for strict business, after she was done she said " yeah, i'll call you after work for non-work related stuff, cause i see you are pretty busy rite now"...

LB - i hear you.. will take that into consideration, nice.

Redpill, Franciso, MikeEdward - okay seriously now.. i didn't know software like that existed on this planet.. damn. im quite behind... but i like MikeEdwards DRM, i need that...

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

ACT can be completely customized, which is why I like it. You can take whatever your relationship management process is and make the software reflect it.

That's the good and bad thing about it. It's highly customizable if you have a system which already works for you. Unfortunately a lot of guys don't have a system or only know portions of one. They're looking for a program to tell them what to do along the way and whether or not the prospect is qualified or not. Perhaps it would just be easier to keep a spreadsheet of their contacts and information including last contact date along with a synopsis of what they talked about last. It would still be overkill if they aren't meeting a lot of people in the first place.

 

[edger]

it just gotten to the point where i just give my number to girls. cause they number close ME...

And so much for a lot of the jargon around here about how "women don't do that". If a chick really digs you, she will pursue you and number close you. Plain and simple. I always say this. Of course there are exceptions to though.

Sir-M, I've got a question for ya...when you meet these chix, are you cold-approaching them, or are they throwing you vibes? How does the whole thing with you and them get started? I'm just curious.

 

[guru1000]

Hi. this is probably one of the most childish posts on the mature man's forum.. anyway throughout the years reading posts here and finally deciding to join. i think i have turbocharged my Djness.. im so dj i need a p.a. (that rhymes, try it out). i have been getting an overwhelming number of chicks going for me, i just cant manage. i think So suave should offer chick managment lessons after bootcamp.. please please.. it just gotten to the point where i just give my number to girls. cause they number close ME... besides i really couldnt be bothered to try number close anyone i got so much on my plate already, and i dont wanna pull a LJBF stunt, or say "here take a number and join the queue".... im moderately hot.. and chicks that are after me are like 8s and 8.5s and a few 9s (i really dont like rating chicks as high as 9. so lets say 8.9).. i think of myself as a 7. although most think im an 8 or more.. ( i would never put myself as high as 9 too)... okay okay, lets not move too far away from the subject... chick management lessons please.. i turn down enough chicks.. but that looks like its not enough as i thought.. help

This thread sounds like a cry for attention.

Women who initially pursue you will try once or twice before they give up. A woman handles rejection 10 times harder than a guy. After all, this is what their livelihood is, TO ATTRACT.

When a girl calls you that you are not interested in, either do not respond or say " Sorry, I cannot talk now". It is quite easy to covertly blow a girl off.

The goal is to stay abundant. This is not to be confused with entertaining women you are not interested in.

Date as many interested women as you can handle without compromising your time for personal responsibilities. Stay in non exclusive arrangements with full disclosure and have fun. In time, one will show herself to be leagues ahead of the harem and then you will have to make a decision of whether to give her the gift of exclusivity or not.

 

[MikeEdward1973]

That's the good and bad thing about it. It's highly customizable if you have a system which already works for you. Unfortunately a lot of guys don't have a system or only know portions of one. They're looking for a program to tell them what to do along the way and whether or not the prospect is qualified or not. Perhaps it would just be easier to keep a spreadsheet of their contacts and information including last contact date along with a synopsis of what they talked about last. It would still be overkill if they aren't meeting a lot of people in the first place.

Yeah, I can see the use for a hosted app with canned reports & drop down menus for dating. model would have to be paid text links and ads served by Google, etc., since it would have to be free. But that would be a fun project.

 

[Sir-M]

The goal is to stay abundant.

hmmm. elaborate more please

 

[MacAvoy]

but im taking numbers of like 50 or more people a day, and believe me some of them come to ask silly questions ... so they make up questions so they can speak to me.... sigh.. one the other day came for strict business, after she was done she said " yeah, i'll call you after work for non-work related stuff, cause i see you are pretty busy rite now"...

Well I think you could really benefit from the CRM software that everyone talked about. Act looks expensive but would probably pay dividends from a career perspective down the road. On the other hand $1000 is a small price to pay if it means you can get twice as much pvssy by being more effecient.

But I can see your problem. I think what you have to do in this case is a combination of two things. Set your priorities, only follow up with girls that really do something for you, either from a looks perspective or from a personality perspective. Don't waste your time on average good looking girls, focus on the cream of the crop. The other suggestion I would make is to make exceptions for girls with HIGH IL. Like the one that came out and bluntly gave her intentions. This should be an easy lay and then you can judge if she's worthy of more of your time.

I think something to not overlook at is the reasoning behind your success. I think its two fold, your in a position of power/authority, your advicing these young impressional women on their career and more importantly, your coming across in a fun, confident (aka attractive) way.

Keep it up and keep improving yourself.