Chic I met in vacation wants to come to the states to work for 3 months and stay at my place

[Lover_boy]

So in my recent travels I reunited with an old friend from high school. she showed me around her town and introduced me to her sisters. One of them (the youngest one) age 23 is really cute but had a bf at the time. I didnt initiate anything since she was pretty hung up on her bf, but we spent a lot of time together and formed a close friendship. She recently broke up with her bf and she called me to tell me that she wants to come to Miami and work for 3 months and if she could stay at my place. Her parents have given her permission to come and now she’s looking for a plane ticket. I told her she’s more than welcome to come. But not sure if it would be the right idea. If she’s here I’m obviously gonna want to escalate things and in 3 months a lot can happen. However things are still in fiend zone. Thoughts ?

 

[devilkingx2]

Only you know your relationship with her, whether she has you gay-brother zoned or if she intends to pay her rent in sex.

I think you should try to subtly test the waters. Make some kind of joke about sex and gauge her reaction.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Yes! Let her crash at your place! There will be many opportunities to escalate in three months.

 

[Billtx49]

Get the financial aspect settled with her, sign nothing legal, and get your mind right first. You don’t want to be feeding her for three months. After that it’s a plus, take her out with you occasionally, you get instant credit from other women by having a cute one on your arm. A free three month female wingman would be an interesting experiment.…

 

[Lover_boy]

Get the financial aspect settled with her, sign nothing legal, and get your mind right first. You don’t want to be feeding her for three months. After that it’s a plus, take her out with you occasionally, you get instant credit from other women by having a cute one on your arm. A free three month female wingman would be an interesting experiment.…

This is actually really good advice

 

[Lover_boy]

Setting yourself up for a possible dissapointment. Girl you dont really know using you your recources and you hope to smash for 3 months. Sounds like a huge covert contract.

Do this atleast.

She won’t be living for free here that’s for sure, and she will have to cover expenses. It would be interesting to have her around for 3 months though, shell be entering my world and my frame.

 

[Barrister]

This sounds like a terrible idea on multiple levels. I can guarantee you she isn't considering you some romantic option for herself if she is asking to stay with you unless she is batsh1t crazy. It is far more likely that you have been relegated to the friendzone and she considers you "safe" hence why she is asking this. And yes, the other guys nailed this by highlighting the fact that she is doing this because she sees free rent, free utilities, and possibly free meal tickets out of you while she lives with you.

I would do a hard pass unless you get a written agreement from her agreeing to cover certain things while she stays with you. And if you do that, do NOT expect some romantic fling. If it happens great - but it is far more likely that it won't.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Bad idea all around. Do not accept.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

So in my recent travels I reunited with an old friend from high school. she showed me around her town and introduced me to her sisters. One of them (the youngest one) age 23 is really cute but had a bf at the time. I didnt initiate anything since she was pretty hung up on her bf, but we spent a lot of time together and formed a close friendship. She recently broke up with her bf and she called me to tell me that she wants to come to Miami and work for 3 months and if she could stay at my place. Her parents have given her permission to come and now she’s looking for a plane ticket. I told her she’s more than welcome to come. But not sure if it would be the right idea. If she’s here I’m obviously gonna want to escalate things and in 3 months a lot can happen. However things are still in fiend zone. Thoughts ?

Think with your head first and as @Billtx49 mentioned, set the logistics and expectations.

If your agenda is to bang this girl and your approach to this is that it might be easier if she lives with you then you're thinking with your penis. And as we all know, it often leads us astray.

Keep in mind that she will be in Miami regardless so you can still kick it with her and escalate. You don't need her living with you to do that. But if on the other hand you truly want to help her out then as mentioned, set the logistics first then take it from there.

Lastly, 3 months is a long time. Keep that in mind. I've had girls I connected really well with but after spending a weekend together I wanted to run for the hills. Once she is moved in and if things get weird you'll feel inhibited in your own home aka your sanctuary.


Modern Man Advice

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Setting yourself up for a possible dissapointment. Girl you dont really know using you your recources and you hope to smash for 3 months. Sounds like a huge covert contract.

Do this atleast.

Plus, she's a foreigner looking to come to the U.S. These types of women tend to be materialistic/social climbers. You haven't banged her, and the whole time she may be thinking "is he good enough?" while you now have a roommate situation you have to negotiate.

 

[devilkingx2]

She won’t be living for free here that’s for sure, and she will have to cover expenses. It would be interesting to have her around for 3 months though, shell be entering my world and my frame.

Make sure she also knows that and isn't under the impression you're offering 3 months of free room and board.

 

[Lover_boy]

This sounds like a terrible idea on multiple levels. I can guarantee you she isn't considering you some romantic option for herself if she is asking to stay with you unless she is batsh1t crazy. It is far more likely that you have been relegated to the friendzone and she considers you "safe" hence why she is asking this. And yes, the other guys nailed this by highlighting the fact that she is doing this because she sees free rent, free utilities, and possibly free meal tickets out of you while she lives with you.

I would do a hard pass unless you get a written agreement from her agreeing to cover certain things while she stays with you. And if you do that, do NOT expect some romantic fling. If it happens great - but it is far more likely that it won't.

She just messaged me today saying that she wants to come for sure and that she wants to cover the financial aspect of things clearly. Hence, how much she will need to cover for rent, food utilities and she said to discuss it with her dad as well. So at least she has it clear that she won’t be living for free.

However, I’m afraid youre right, she doesn’t see me sexually and she sees me as “safe” and tbh I kinda like having my own space and being on my own. Maybe things could escalate but I think it would be a long haul. And if things get awkward then there goes the friendship too. Ive been entertaining the idea but come to think of it, i don’t know if it’s a good idea

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

So one thing to consider is that you will be pissed as **** if she stays with you and never gives it up. It’ll eat away at you and you’ll become passive aggressive, then you’ll want to tell her to go pound dirt. It’s a bad set up all the way around.

Do not do this, it will **** with your frame. Some plates won’t want to come over, because they’ll assume you’re banging her even if you aren’t.

good luck either way

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She just messaged me today saying that she wants to come for sure and that she wants to cover the financial aspect of things clearly. Hence, how much she will need to cover for rent, food utilities and she said to discuss it with her dad as well. So at least she has it clear that she won’t be living for free.

However, I’m afraid youre right, she doesn’t see me sexually and she sees me as “safe” and tbh I kinda like having my own space and being on my own. Maybe things could escalate but I think it would be a long haul. And if things get awkward then there goes the friendship too. Ive been entertaining the idea but come to think of it, i don’t know if it’s a good idea

Just let her know that if she doesn't see this as being anything more than just friends you don't think it would work out.

 

[devilkingx2]

She just messaged me today saying that she wants to come for sure and that she wants to cover the financial aspect of things clearly. Hence, how much she will need to cover for rent, food utilities and she said to discuss it with her dad as well. So at least she has it clear that she won’t be living for free.

However, I’m afraid youre right, she doesn’t see me sexually and she sees me as “safe” and tbh I kinda like having my own space and being on my own. Maybe things could escalate but I think it would be a long haul. And if things get awkward then there goes the friendship too. Ive been entertaining the idea but come to think of it, i don’t know if it’s a good idea

I would ask her how she feels about paying the rent with sex then add a wink emoji and a laughing emoji

Negative reaction = friendzone and she probably pulls out

Neutral reaction = game on

Positive reaction = victory, time to celebrate.

If she just laughs, say something like "I'll take that as a yes then" with a devil emoji.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I would ask her how she feels about paying the rent with sex then add a wink emoji and a laughing emoji

Negative reaction = friendzone and she probably pulls out

Neutral reaction = game on

Positive reaction = victory, time to celebrate.

If she just laughs, say something like "I'll take that as a yes then" with a devil emoji.

That will cut to the chaste real quick. I like it.

 

[zinc4]

So in my recent travels I reunited with an old friend from high school. she showed me around her town and introduced me to her sisters. One of them (the youngest one) age 23 is really cute but had a bf at the time. I didnt initiate anything since she was pretty hung up on her bf, but we spent a lot of time together and formed a close friendship. She recently broke up with her bf and she called me to tell me that she wants to come to Miami and work for 3 months and if she could stay at my place. Her parents have given her permission to come and now she’s looking for a plane ticket. I told her she’s more than welcome to come. But not sure if it would be the right idea. If she’s here I’m obviously gonna want to escalate things and in 3 months a lot can happen. However things are still in fiend zone. Thoughts ?

Three months. With my current gf even just three days feels like a long time. I would not do it unless she is just like your 10/10 and she has made it apparent that she wants you romantically. Even then.....i think id go crazy.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Another tact you can use is to tell ask how she would feel about you bringing other women home and that you don't want any weird vibes with that and judge her reaction.

It will be pretty apparent if she is interested or not most likely.

 

[bat soup]

So in my recent travels I reunited with an old friend from high school. she showed me around her town and introduced me to her sisters. One of them (the youngest one) age 23 is really cute but had a bf at the time. I didnt initiate anything since she was pretty hung up on her bf, but we spent a lot of time together and formed a close friendship. She recently broke up with her bf and she called me to tell me that she wants to come to Miami and work for 3 months and if she could stay at my place. Her parents have given her permission to come and now she’s looking for a plane ticket. I told her she’s more than welcome to come. But not sure if it would be the right idea. If she’s here I’m obviously gonna want to escalate things and in 3 months a lot can happen. However things are still in fiend zone. Thoughts ?

Tell her that you want to bang and if she blocks you, you just saved yourself 3 months of friendzone hell.

 

[Juanto]

I would not agree to anything of this sort unless there is a sexual element involved, right now there is zero.