Cheated on the girlfriend at the beginning of the relationship

SpazzAttackk

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****, I wonder how many topics you guys get like this? Anywho, I like to consider myself an "Alpha" but like most I have a bit of a beta side in me. Ive been with my girlfriend Long Term for 8 months now, I was the one who took her virginity and I was her first real serious relationship but I have this little creature haunting me when Im not with her, it haunts me mainly because to both of us, we have the perfect relationship. We give each other no grief, no real arguements, she cooks for me, we give each other an ideal amount of space and the trust between us is strong at this point. Anywho, during our first 2 months I headed off to Europe for 2 weeks, obviously this is before I took her virginity, before the "I love yous" and before meeting the potential future in laws. It was a time where no one really knew where this relationship was going, and for all I knew she was gonna leave me by the time I got back to North America. But back on topic.

I went to Europe, had a few drinks in me and I met this 30 something year old married woman with kids (Im still a youngin, 21 years old). I noticed she was giving me a lot of green lights, so as someone whos used to not being in a serious relationship I drove through those green lights and we slept with each other. At the time I did feel guilty but I figured hey, in a few months time Ill forget about this and Ill move on. Nope. I see myself with my current Long Term for a long, long time if you know what Im getting at, and because we both think our relationship is perfect I feel as though I need to tell her what happened that night and explain that we were still getting to know each other so I didnt know what to expect.

What say you? Should I tell her? She comes from a very religious family and if her parents know, obviously it'll be extremely terrible for the relationship and I have a very strong bond with her parents, from what I know they love me.

I know you're thinking "Oh, but if you dont say anything no one will find out" Yeah, but 2 of my buddies know and one of them can be extremely malicious and he holds grudges like a female does, I can see him being a rat and telling her VIA Good ol' facebook messenger. So I'm weighing the Pros and Cons. Maybe she'll never find out, or maybe somewhere down the road she will and maybe she'll find out when she has an engagement ring on her finger.

I dont know what to do, and I need advice. I can see her forgiving me but I can also see this damaging the relationship even if she does forgive. Theres also the big possibility of losing everything we have.
 

denverfan110

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No.

If you weren't exclusive don't. You shouldn't even have any guilt. Even if you were exclusive it wasn't serious. You can fool around until anyone says I love you and you guys hadn't even slammed yet.

No worries dude. No shame in keeping it a secret.
 

SpazzAttackk

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denverfan110 said:
No.

If you weren't exclusive don't. You shouldn't even have any guilt. Even if you were exclusive it wasn't serious. You can fool around until anyone says I love you and you guys hadn't even slammed yet.

No worries dude. No shame in keeping it a secret.
Thats where I screwed up, I asked for it to be official 1 week prior to going. Still, we hadnt done anything serious other than that. Maybe one day she'll find out and Ill have to explain myself, but for now Im just gonna enjoy the time I can with her. I wont tell her
 

denverfan110

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Yeah no need to throw yourself under the bus man. You were in Europe, **** happens.
 

Tiguere

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Dont be a silly nancy.. Women are capable of that and more... Take that secret to the grave and become a man
 

Checkmate12

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First off, you shouldn't be bros with a guy who would even consider revealing that type of information to your girl, regardless of the condition of your friendship. Secondly, if you are then you sure as heck shouldn't confide in such a person. But I'm sure you know that now. Man, that's a secret you take to the grave, because if you do tell, your relationship will NEVER be the same, whether she decides to forgive you or not.
 

ZurichBateman

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Exactly as some previous users said. No good will ever come out of her finding this out. EVER.

You ****ed some euro chick, good for you man. At your/our age it's healthy to sample a diverse set of girls. Just keep it under control so it doesn't hurt her.

If your relationship with that girl is strong, you shouldn't have to even worry about any guy saying **** about what you may or may not have done across the Atlantic.

But you need to be good in the BS department, deny the whole thing if he ever outs you, throw in some half-truths like for example something like sure there was a girl you saw in a bar in Europe that you had a short convo with and she was clearly attracted to you, but you didn't go any further with that and...BOOM you're clear.
 
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