The Power of Self-Image
The best attitude to have is the one where you will constantly change yourself and never remain static. This attitude is great if you have many faults.
Skinny?
Great. Change yourself to be a bodybuilder, make it your life's goal. It will give you something to do with yourself here on this earth and it will flip your image on it's head.
Shy?
Great. Change yourself to be a social animal and you will increase the satisfaction of your life tenfold.
Boring?
Perfect. Change yourself to be the most charming, exciting, enthusiastic person you can imagine and laugh and joke with people continuously.
Sad?
Excellent. Change yourself to be overly happy and have fun with your life.
It is strangely easy to become the opposite of what you are, and then after a while of doing the opposite, you can find a steady medium, happy in the knowledge that you are capable of anything.
Break on through to the other side!
You must blast through your own mind telling you what you should do. This is fear and self-doubt, and it is your worst enemy.
No more "that is not me", no more "I am just not like that", no more "I am not good enough." You are not good enough now, but over time you can easily change yourself to be good at anything that you want.
This is the only mindset you need. Don't fall in love with yourself because you will be changed. Don't get down on yourself because you will be a different person tomorrow. You are never perfect, always learning, never static, always changing.
The only thing we have to fear?
Fear is created by YOU trying to escape your own self-image, you are afraid that you will do something stupid. Just change your self-image.
Don’t worry, you will do stupid things, but the sticking point is if you can ignore what you did and forgive yourself for doing stupid things. Just ignore the dumb things that you do, and change yourself into whatever you want to be. Have the confidence to know that you are above your actions, and that shyt happens.
Also know that if you work hard at anything you will eventually be good. For example, you say to yourself "I will become a player," and then get shot down by every girl you meet for the next two weeks. (NOT LIKELY, but it MAY happen
) But this is just a test, if you stay on course (and improve yourself by working out, socializing, improving your life so you have things to talk about, etc.) you will achieve your goal. The mind is the impetus to change, but to truly be successful you must change your outside world with your attitude.
As long as you define yourself, nothing can change you from your course.
A Little Anecdote
I have always defined myself as a very smart person. Back when I was a child, I happened to have high scores on standardized tests and such. So I carried that self-definition as a part of me. When I slacked off in high school and got bad grades, that did not bother me because the self-definition of me as a smart person was so deep. When I had to take the college tests (SAT), the first time that I took it, I got an average score.
This did not meld with my self-image at all.
So what did I do? I obviously did not have the skills to get a good grade on the test. Shear willpower would NOT do either. So I worked hard and studied and ended up getting a perfect score. I blew away everyone including the valedictorian.
Everybody was like, "wow, you are so smart." I tried to tell them it is just hard work, but nobody listens. They just said that I got a good score because I was smart. All my effort and determination was utterly ignored. It is like the world is made not to encourage people, but just the opposite, to try to tell them that destiny is all. That fate and God control everything. And that all you should do is rely on your "gifts" and "talents" to get by and to love everyone and be walked on for the whole of your life.
What really happened?
What really happened was that I refused to submit to the fact that I was not smart since my self-image of being smart was so deeply ingrained in my psyche. Even the failure of the first test did not stop me. It would have stopped someone else who had the attitude that they are just average, and then, the average score would NOT have contradicted that attitude. A person with a lesser self-definition would have submitted and then gotten the average score.
You are your only enemy. You are your only friend. The world reflects what is in your mind because your mind is the amalgamation of all your perceptions and experiences.
Keep in mind that the changes will not come overnight. You are removing yourself from your comfort zone and will have many hardships when you first start, but when it is all said and done, you will be a different person.
Ignore anything anyone says to you, to an extent. Take it with a grain of salt; do not take it personally. For example, if you feel great, but your family says that you are in a bad mood, who do you think is right? You are, but there is a reason your family says that you are in a bad mood. Just because they don’t like the way you act around them doesn't mean that you have to change, just know what they think and keep that in mind. Don't change your attitude based on others opinions, but, if you want to, you can change how you act.
Why do I think this way?
I have always been kind of a jerk. Not really nasty, but I was always kind of crazy and insulting to everyone. My wit enabled me to keep a fairly high social status. Flaying another male verbally really gets the women off! I would rip on someone, and the women would say, "icepick, you are so mean!" and then they would flip their hair and give me 'eyes'. Ha ha. Even though I was a skinny kid, I still would be able to control and dominate most people I came into contact with.
However, my insecurities (I thought of myself as "ugly") kept me from scoring with any other chicks then the ones that "threw themselves at me". But that is besides the point.
But when I tried to apply lofty 'morals', I became unhappy and started to repel people. When I started to become nice and accommodating, it seemed like people were beginning to control me.
I lost my sense of self.
I began to put out a façade of 'niceness' (and we all know that repels) and wondered why I was getting so depressed with my life.
I tried to change myself to fit in with the concept of 'morality' and 'love everyone' bull****. The typical "do unto others…" crap.
It clashed with my natural tendencies.
I was NOT happy.
Then I found this site. Of course, I changed my self-image to a ladies man right away. Also, I dumped my "nice guy" self image also.
Confidence, happiness, and success ensued.
With this success, I became comfortable. I once again tried to apply lofty morals. I attempted to dump my entire self-image.
When I had no self-image, I lost all ability to take control of situations. Since I had no self, I was completely transparent, and as such, I became REACTIVE.
Instead of trying to 'mold' my environment, I 'reacted' to it.
Instead of trying to make others understand my opinions, I tried to understand THEIRS.
Instead of "taking control" in my interactions with a chick, I reacted to what SHE did.
Enter unhappiness.
My point is...
You must develop a strong self-image. However, it must be a GOOD one. You must define your own world.
Do NOT just react to what happens, MAKE things happen.
The best attitude to have is the one where you will constantly change yourself and never remain static. This attitude is great if you have many faults.
Skinny?
Great. Change yourself to be a bodybuilder, make it your life's goal. It will give you something to do with yourself here on this earth and it will flip your image on it's head.
Shy?
Great. Change yourself to be a social animal and you will increase the satisfaction of your life tenfold.
Boring?
Perfect. Change yourself to be the most charming, exciting, enthusiastic person you can imagine and laugh and joke with people continuously.
Sad?
Excellent. Change yourself to be overly happy and have fun with your life.
It is strangely easy to become the opposite of what you are, and then after a while of doing the opposite, you can find a steady medium, happy in the knowledge that you are capable of anything.
Break on through to the other side!
You must blast through your own mind telling you what you should do. This is fear and self-doubt, and it is your worst enemy.
No more "that is not me", no more "I am just not like that", no more "I am not good enough." You are not good enough now, but over time you can easily change yourself to be good at anything that you want.
This is the only mindset you need. Don't fall in love with yourself because you will be changed. Don't get down on yourself because you will be a different person tomorrow. You are never perfect, always learning, never static, always changing.
The only thing we have to fear?
Fear is created by YOU trying to escape your own self-image, you are afraid that you will do something stupid. Just change your self-image.
Don’t worry, you will do stupid things, but the sticking point is if you can ignore what you did and forgive yourself for doing stupid things. Just ignore the dumb things that you do, and change yourself into whatever you want to be. Have the confidence to know that you are above your actions, and that shyt happens.
Also know that if you work hard at anything you will eventually be good. For example, you say to yourself "I will become a player," and then get shot down by every girl you meet for the next two weeks. (NOT LIKELY, but it MAY happen
) But this is just a test, if you stay on course (and improve yourself by working out, socializing, improving your life so you have things to talk about, etc.) you will achieve your goal. The mind is the impetus to change, but to truly be successful you must change your outside world with your attitude.As long as you define yourself, nothing can change you from your course.
A Little Anecdote
I have always defined myself as a very smart person. Back when I was a child, I happened to have high scores on standardized tests and such. So I carried that self-definition as a part of me. When I slacked off in high school and got bad grades, that did not bother me because the self-definition of me as a smart person was so deep. When I had to take the college tests (SAT), the first time that I took it, I got an average score.
This did not meld with my self-image at all.
So what did I do? I obviously did not have the skills to get a good grade on the test. Shear willpower would NOT do either. So I worked hard and studied and ended up getting a perfect score. I blew away everyone including the valedictorian.
Everybody was like, "wow, you are so smart." I tried to tell them it is just hard work, but nobody listens. They just said that I got a good score because I was smart. All my effort and determination was utterly ignored. It is like the world is made not to encourage people, but just the opposite, to try to tell them that destiny is all. That fate and God control everything. And that all you should do is rely on your "gifts" and "talents" to get by and to love everyone and be walked on for the whole of your life.
What really happened?
What really happened was that I refused to submit to the fact that I was not smart since my self-image of being smart was so deeply ingrained in my psyche. Even the failure of the first test did not stop me. It would have stopped someone else who had the attitude that they are just average, and then, the average score would NOT have contradicted that attitude. A person with a lesser self-definition would have submitted and then gotten the average score.
You are your only enemy. You are your only friend. The world reflects what is in your mind because your mind is the amalgamation of all your perceptions and experiences.
Keep in mind that the changes will not come overnight. You are removing yourself from your comfort zone and will have many hardships when you first start, but when it is all said and done, you will be a different person.
Ignore anything anyone says to you, to an extent. Take it with a grain of salt; do not take it personally. For example, if you feel great, but your family says that you are in a bad mood, who do you think is right? You are, but there is a reason your family says that you are in a bad mood. Just because they don’t like the way you act around them doesn't mean that you have to change, just know what they think and keep that in mind. Don't change your attitude based on others opinions, but, if you want to, you can change how you act.
Why do I think this way?
I have always been kind of a jerk. Not really nasty, but I was always kind of crazy and insulting to everyone. My wit enabled me to keep a fairly high social status. Flaying another male verbally really gets the women off! I would rip on someone, and the women would say, "icepick, you are so mean!" and then they would flip their hair and give me 'eyes'. Ha ha. Even though I was a skinny kid, I still would be able to control and dominate most people I came into contact with.
However, my insecurities (I thought of myself as "ugly") kept me from scoring with any other chicks then the ones that "threw themselves at me". But that is besides the point.
But when I tried to apply lofty 'morals', I became unhappy and started to repel people. When I started to become nice and accommodating, it seemed like people were beginning to control me.
I lost my sense of self.
I began to put out a façade of 'niceness' (and we all know that repels) and wondered why I was getting so depressed with my life.
I tried to change myself to fit in with the concept of 'morality' and 'love everyone' bull****. The typical "do unto others…" crap.
It clashed with my natural tendencies.
I was NOT happy.
Then I found this site. Of course, I changed my self-image to a ladies man right away. Also, I dumped my "nice guy" self image also.
Confidence, happiness, and success ensued.
With this success, I became comfortable. I once again tried to apply lofty morals. I attempted to dump my entire self-image.
When I had no self-image, I lost all ability to take control of situations. Since I had no self, I was completely transparent, and as such, I became REACTIVE.
Instead of trying to 'mold' my environment, I 'reacted' to it.
Instead of trying to make others understand my opinions, I tried to understand THEIRS.
Instead of "taking control" in my interactions with a chick, I reacted to what SHE did.
Enter unhappiness.
My point is...
You must develop a strong self-image. However, it must be a GOOD one. You must define your own world.
Do NOT just react to what happens, MAKE things happen.
