Catching feelings w/ a F buddy

[btownbuck2012]

Well maybe she is, maybe she is not. The point is I shouldnt be this worked up. Sure I could spin other plates, then when one person comes along she becomes idealized in my head and I would be on square one... The cycle repeats itself. WTF.

I appreciate everyone's response ITT btw, I am not antagonizing anyone. I am just trying to discuss.

That's why this spinning plates crap that is regurgitated on this forum daily is useless for men whom don't have a strong inner game (i.e. self confidence AND a strong sense of self worth/identity). THAT is the real issue here. You're letting this woman unravel you. You've got to figure out why that is happening. It could be a long process, too - one a-lot of people don't partake in because it takes too long and it can be very difficult. If you can do that THEN start spinning plates. Until then, nothing will matter. Even the PUA Mystery gets suicidal when women he falls for leave him. This guy has slept with hundreds if not thousands of women but he's still basically a chump. Google it.

 

[CMNILS87]

That's why this spinning plates crap that is regurgitated on this forum daily is useless for men whom don't have a strong inner game (i.e. self confidence AND a strong sense of self worth/identity). THAT is the real issue here. You're letting this woman unravel you. You've got to figure out why that is happening. It could be a long process, too - one a-lot of people don't partake in because it takes too long and it can be very difficult. If you can do that THEN start spinning plates. Until then, nothing will matter. Even the PUA Mystery gets suicidal when women he falls for leave him. This guy has slept with hundreds if not thousands of women but he's still basically a chump. Google it.

The problem I found with spinning plates 24/7 I thst it takes a lot of your time. Setting a date with her, banging another this day. I commend guys thst can keep up with the rat race, but I have a ton of other stuff going on that doesn’t allow for banging multiple women. I honestly would rather sleep than have a chick over at 2am.

 

[btownbuck2012]

The problem I found with spinning plates 24/7 I thst it takes a lot of your time. Setting a date with her, banging another this day. I commend guys thst can keep up with the rat race, but I have a ton of other stuff going on that doesn’t allow for banging multiple women. I honestly would rather sleep than have a chick over at 2am.

Same. Completely agree. If the ROI was higher with modern women it'd be a different story. But it is what it is.

 

[dudewut]

UPDATE

So basically this powder keg of emotions blew tf up and I decided to confront her albeit, lightly/jokingly. Now she is assuring me that I am the only one she is sleeping with (rolls eyes) and will go to great lengths to prove it. E.g. She started snapping me while she is at work just to prove it to me.

Early this morning she told me she is turning on her Snapchat location so I can see that is indeed at home (its her day off).... Now here is what my neurotic mind is telling me: "Why, after all this time, did she decide to do this? Is it so another d*ck appointment can properly locate her via snapchat?"

Having trust issues suck... I am exasperating myself thinking about all this **** and bottling up all this sh*t to keep appearances.

 

[CMNILS87]

UPDATE

So basically this powder keg of emotions blew tf up and I decided to confront her albeit, lightly/jokingly. Now she is assuring me that I am the only one she is sleeping with (rolls eyes) and will go to great lengths to prove it. E.g. She started snapping me while she is at work just to prove it to me.

Early this morning she told me she is turning on her Snapchat location so I can see that is indeed at home (its her day off).... Now here is what my neurotic mind is telling me: "Why, after all this time, did she decide to do this? Is it so another d*ck appointment can properly locate her via snapchat?"

Having trust issues suck... I am exasperating myself thinking about all this **** and bottling up all this sh*t to keep appearances.

Oh boy. She’s invested in you man. If she’s doing all that stuff to convince you. You **** the bed on this one, the only reason she didn’t walk away is she thinks you’re higher value or she more insecure than you. Just keep casually dating her and lay off the complaining

 

[btownbuck2012]

UPDATE

So basically this powder keg of emotions blew tf up and I decided to confront her albeit, lightly/jokingly. Now she is assuring me that I am the only one she is sleeping with (rolls eyes) and will go to great lengths to prove it. E.g. She started snapping me while she is at work just to prove it to me.

Early this morning she told me she is turning on her Snapchat location so I can see that is indeed at home (its her day off).... Now here is what my neurotic mind is telling me: "Why, after all this time, did she decide to do this? Is it so another d*ck appointment can properly locate her via snapchat?"

Having trust issues suck... I am exasperating myself thinking about all this **** and bottling up all this sh*t to keep appearances.

No matter how good things are right now, your spill over of emotions has definitely put into motion the beginning of the end. You have shown her, if but nothing else a subconscious level at this point that you are not man enough to handle her. Keep in mind that this is a hoe who is not even worth all this.

Expect major push/pull, attitude changes, flaking and outright disrespect from her in the NEAR future.

 

[Macaframalama]

UPDATE

So basically this powder keg of emotions blew tf up and I decided to confront her albeit, lightly/jokingly. Now she is assuring me that I am the only one she is sleeping with (rolls eyes) and will go to great lengths to prove it. E.g. She started snapping me while she is at work just to prove it to me.

Early this morning she told me she is turning on her Snapchat location so I can see that is indeed at home (its her day off).... Now here is what my neurotic mind is telling me: "Why, after all this time, did she decide to do this? Is it so another d*ck appointment can properly locate her via snapchat?"

Having trust issues suck... I am exasperating myself thinking about all this **** and bottling up all this sh*t to keep appearances.

You're getting boxed into a relationship bruh. CTFU!

 

[dudewut]

Ah ****.

So now what? Now my instincts are telling me to just ghost her, and never think of this whole shenanigans again.

 

[marmel75]

Long story short, I am talking to a girl who is not a good idea besides being a FWB or F*ckbuddy or someone you can get nudes from or hit up when you are bored.

Problem is I am starting to give a f*ck about her, where my brain is starting to tell me that she is probably cheating on me or lying to me (mind you, we are not in a relationship... this is the beta coming out) my brain is constantly nitpicking little details and inconsistencies.This is not a good mindset and all its doing is cramping my game and preventing me from having fun and sex.

Now I dont know if its insecurity or if I will attract what I fear etc. OR maybe its my instincts telling me something is wrong (I dont like being lied to) however, I want these feelings of attachment, jealousy, etc. to stop. It makes no sense, she is not my girlfriend yet my sub-conscious makes it seem like she is.

How do I make it stop? How do I get better at compartmentalizing?

Talk to more women, go on more dates and have more sex with other girls.

 

[dudewut]

I am going to BUMP my thread with a question for more experienced players:

In a FWB/'F*ck buddy arrangement, are both parties overt about sleeping with other people? Or is that implied?

Its tough for me because I usually just have fun with a girl and I let her talk relationship stuff. And my last FWB sort of just dropped a gem "I have to go, I am meeting my boyfriend and his coworkers later" so I knew it was just a physical relationship. I never really had this discussion with the girl in my OP, and its really awkward. Should I even bring it up?

"Hey are you seeing anyone else?"
"You know its cool if you are seeing someone else, I'd rather know"

 

[dudewut]

BUMP my old thread.

How do you deal with jealousy in this situation? Not hers, mine.