Can't think of **** to say... please help!

[LaDanian Tomlinson]

So the majority of the time I hang out with women, we are drinking. So I have been trying to step up my sober game. However, it is a lot harder than I thought it would be. So the other day I go to the zoo for a field trip with some hot chick from my class. We have talked a number of times before this and it's gone well. So we're there for like two or three hours just me and her walking around the zoo. Part of the time we had good conversation and the other part was just awkward silence. I would try so hard to think of something to talk about and then I just would say something and it would be something dumb. So I had a golden opportunity with a hot chick that has shown interest but I just couldn't think of enough legitimate conversation topics. And then when I realized there was some awkward silence going on, I would just blert out something stupid and she'd have this look like "what are you talking about?".

So can anyone give me any ideas? My buddy mentioned to think of **** to talk about before I go and hang out with a girl, which is a good idea. But what would be good topics to talk about and how would I bring it up? Like I don't want to be like "so what kind of music do you like?" because that's not natural and smooth. Please help a brotha out!

 

[Furyguy]

There are things in life that interest you, right? Find something you are interested in and just start talking about it. As long WoW isn't the only thing you love. Then get some new hobbies.


Personally, though...

I like asking people to name something they don't like about themselves. No game theory behind it, I just find it interesting.

I like What do you want to be when you grow up?

I also like talking about ****ed up psychological disorders. But that is just me. Religion, philosophy, the ol' 'Why the **** are we and what does this all mean' seems to work pretty well too.

I also like What is something you envision happening in the future that will make you extremely happy? Compare the different ways men vs. women answer this, it's interesting.

Talking about dreams is pretty cool, too. Most people can go on for hours about the ****ed up dreams they've had. And then you can make fun of her for having such weird dreams and it gives you a little inside joke thing to share and laugh at that other people won't understand.

You are chilling with a person you don't know very well for 3 hours, you are going to have some silent points. They're really only as awkward as you make them.

 

[GettinLuckyAintLuck]

^^^^ dreams and religion aren't exactly hot topics in regards to attracting women. You shouldn't feel any pressure to talk. Be comfortable not saying anything. Make her be the bumbling idiot looking for topics, that shouldn't be who you are.... unless sadly, it is who you are. Then you've got other issues as far as conversations go.

 

[CarlitosWay]

So the majority of the time I hang out with women, we are drinking. So I have been trying to step up my sober game. However, it is a lot harder than I thought it would be. So the other day I go to the zoo for a field trip with some hot chick from my class. We have talked a number of times before this and it's gone well. So we're there for like two or three hours just me and her walking around the zoo. Part of the time we had good conversation and the other part was just awkward silence. I would try so hard to think of something to talk about and then I just would say something and it would be something dumb. So I had a golden opportunity with a hot chick that has shown interest but I just couldn't think of enough legitimate conversation topics. And then when I realized there was some awkward silence going on, I would just blert out something stupid and she'd have this look like "what are you talking about?".

So can anyone give me any ideas? My buddy mentioned to think of **** to talk about before I go and hang out with a girl, which is a good idea. But what would be good topics to talk about and how would I bring it up? Like I don't want to be like "so what kind of music do you like?" because that's not natural and smooth. Please help a brotha out!

Hmmm......I want you to think clearly, take a deeeeeep breath and forget everything you think or "believe" you should talk about and stop stressing and over analyzing.

Remember when you were a real young kid and summer vacation had just started, no problems, no worries about money/work/school? Only worry was wtf you were going to do with all the free time!!! right? All the adventures and crazy fun **** you would do with your buddies or alone!!

Think about that joy that you had in your heart and how content you were, you didn't have jack ****, but you had the time of your life living adventurously, running around joking about this or that,!!!

I want any time you you're with a chic to also remember she was just like this, a lot of people forget about this sort of "youthful innocent joy", or they lust for it, but most are "boring/mediocre/not daring enough" for them. A man or woman who helps a person re-connect them with this fun loving kind of child hood spirit that resides in most of us, creates MAGIC. Which if used correctly can and could be used to influence romance/attraction or a friendship if that is to be desired.

Have you ever really payed attention to a young kid having fun? It CAN BE freakin' INFECTIOUS!!! They run around play with this or that or say something funny, even if no one laughs or if some one looks at them funny, they could not care less and on they still go smiling ear to ear!!!

To be a mature masculine man not afraid of his sexuality, who is still in touch with this "inner playful child hood spirit" can be one powerful person.

E.g. I like to play this game for ****s n giggles, cause it entertains ME....I'll throw two celebrity names together and ask who they think is hotter or if I'm with a buddy say "my buddy and me are having this huge argument!! Who do you think is hotter Jessica Alba or Jessica Biel?!!" (great opener btw that you can have fun with, as I tested it on 3-4 servers at a @ local grill spot with great success ) You can even throw something ****ed up in there if you want too lol.

OP you come off too much like you're trying to be an "ENTERTAINER", no you should be entertaining yourself first and a chic/group being entertained is the side effect/benefit !!!! You'll burn yourself out too fast worrying about what to say next or wondering if they'll think it's cool or smooth, **** all that ****. I throw something out there that doesn't work whatever I laugh at myself and move on......

 

[Nygard]

Talk about stuff you'd talk to good friends. Assume rapport. You're confident enough to do it anyways, am I right or what?

 

[Jet]

Hmmm......I want you to think clearly, take a deeeeeep breath and forget everything you think or "believe" you should talk about and stop stressing and over analyzing.

Remember when you were a real young kid and summer vacation had just started, no problems, no worries about money/work/school? Only worry was wtf you were going to do with all the free time!!! right? All the adventures and crazy fun **** you would do with your buddies or alone!!

Think about that joy that you had in your heart and how content you were, you didn't have jack ****, but you had the time of your life living adventurously, running around joking about this or that,!!!

I want any time you you're with a chic to also remember she was just like this, a lot of people forget about this sort of "youthful innocent joy", or they lust for it, but most are "boring/mediocre/not daring enough" for them. A man or woman who helps a person re-connect them with this fun loving kind of child hood spirit that resides in most of us, creates MAGIC. Which if used correctly can and could be used to influence romance/attraction or a friendship if that is to be desired.

Have you ever really payed attention to a young kid having fun? It CAN BE freakin' INFECTIOUS!!! They run around play with this or that or say something funny, even if no one laughs or if some one looks at them funny, they could not care less and on they still go smiling ear to ear!!!

To be a mature masculine man not afraid of his sexuality, who is still in touch with this "inner playful child hood spirit" can be one powerful person.

Love this post man. I will strive to make this part of who I want to be.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Think of random things to talk about like:

Do you ever think animals run out of things to say? Or do they have the same conversations over and over again in their language? Like "I'm hungry,I'm tired, my paw hurts, I have fleas, I just ate someones shoe. And do they ever wish the other one would shut up? To go in a funny direction..

Ask them places they've been to or would like to visit or want to move to and why.

Foods they like to eat or have never tried...to set up a possible lunch for the both of you to try..Something you both haven't eaten like say turkish food so you can both be intrigued and confused by the menu.

Movies they've seen, top five, music, actors actresses they like or dislike. Types of drinks they like, brands of clothing, shoes (women love to talk about clothes and shoes...lol)

What they were for Halloween, best birthday gift they ever received, what they did for christmas, new years, etc.

Hardest class in school, how their family is, if they like being older now and wiser or preferred life when they were a kid, hobbies, worst dating experiences (to get tips on what NOT to do with them).

Alot of times by getting them to talk and you listen you can pick up on things to run with from there. Just try to think of them as a friend, buddy, or a disgusting girl you would never dream of dating during conversations and not as a hot girl. That's what's making your's and alot of our brains at times turn off. Good luck.

 

[CarlitosWay]

Love this post man. I will strive to make this part of who I want to be.

****in' glad my advice/words brought forth courtesy of my great insomnia has affected you in a good way hahaahaa....let me know how this works out. As this is something I also forget from time to time but when I remember to apply, I usually get great results.

I honestly practice it with all women young and old, hot and not so hot, and let me tell you I've put some real big grins on 90% of them and have had some even ok me taking out their cute daughters or saying you would be so good for so and so!!!. I can only imagine the things some of them are imagining in their not so innocent dirty little minds of theirs hahahahaa


EDIT: I'm also a big fan of talking about stuff that their passionate about (after you can share yours).....these are great things to chat about!! be it cooking, a sport or something similar...to learn about their passions or what excites them to no end is getting to the essence of who they are and what they're about......

I can't tell you how exhilarating it is to find out about a chic who's into something extreme, a risk taker be it sky diving, rock climbing or going on week hikes alone in a secluded area, as these are things I enjoy too...

 

[todays_news]

just practice!

remember that when you walk up to them, half the time its not what you say, but its how you say it.. I mean body language etc. When you approach, you must look confident and in control, as if you've done it a hundred times before.

I'm in uni, so approaching women is incredibly simple. so the generic thing is, hello, are you at uni? name, course, who are you here with, complain about lack of money, job etc. and by then if things arent developing then talk to one of her friends instead.

confidence and body language is the thing you NEED to be good with though, regardless of looks, women can smell an unconfident man from across the bar.

So, before you go out, make an effort, do not masturbate, maybe get some new clothes, and it will do wonders for confidence.

In terms of body language, stand up tall and dont slouch, one thing i do is imagine im wearing a cape (as weird as that sounds) as it helps me stand straight, dont look at the floor, and be involved in whats happening around you. More than anything, SMILE and look as thought you're having fun, because you should be.