can you wait too long to reply back to a 'thank you for a great date text'?

[pete101]

i got a 'thank you for a lovely evening text' at 9pm saturday night (we had a 1st date the night before) so i decided to say 'you're welcome. i had a great time too.' the next day at lunchtime.

i was just chilling saturday so i could have replied that night but i didn't want to make it seem like i was in on a saturday night so i waited till sunday to reply.

now i've tried to make our next arrangements for our next date today but she hasn't got back to me.. can you really wait too long to reply back to a thank you text and for her to judge you for it?

 

[Metaphysical]

Obviously. If you wait a week to reply, she will think something is up. I'm not sure why you would resort to playing silly games anyway. She texted you on a saturday night signifying she is thinking about you.

I would have texted her as soon as I got it because I don't have time or the mood to play those little 14 year old girl's games of waiting 3 days after the first date or what ever they are.

If she is up on Saturday night writing to you, why would you embarassed about replying to her? She is doing it too..

 

[pete101]

see this is what i dont get.. she text me the next day signalling high interest. i haven't contacted her since my 'you're welcome text'

and i contact her today to meet up for friday.

she texts me back saying 'hi i'm really sorry but i dont think i'll be able to do it this weekend'

with no counter offer. i can't understand how someone goes from high interest to low interest in the space of 5 days if i haven't even contacted her in anyway.

so when she sent that i called her about 10 mins after (afc move i know ok) and then start to ask how she is blah blah.. she tells me she has assessment exams next week and her college application deadline next week too as is under a lot of pressure to do well. is this a reasonable excuse?

i felt like she was flaking and i didn't want to seem insensitive to her priorities but she told me she goes in after 1pm on thursday's so i couldn't see why we couldn't meet up tonight.. when i muted that she goes 'but i dont feel to go out then..' i didn't actually suggest meeting up tonight i said 'but if you have to go in at 1 on thursdays that means u dont need to get up till 11 so you could go out on wednesday night?'

she just inferred what i meant, maybe i should have pressed her about meeting tonight? she's at school so there's not reason why she'd have a problem.

it ended up me telling her if she wanted to meet up briefly to let me know otherwise we'll meet up end of next week when her exams and applications are over.

did i just get royally flaked and just dont know it yet?

i feel like dejavous is coming and it's over cos i may have 1 demonstrated neediness and clinginess in the phone convo as well as the fact i called 10 mins after she texted.

 

[pete101]

ok i fluffed again.. i couldn't control myself and i thought of a bright idea of calling her after i posted just now letting her know i'm going to be in town relatively close to her area and she should come by and to let me know.

she goes 'ok' but then i press her 'so you coming then?' she goes 'no i'll be staying at home.' i dont know why she's telling me ok like shes interested when she isn't.

i can't understand how she lost so much interest pre-phone call till today. maybe some other guy has come into her life i duno. but i would have thought if she was really interested in me she'd be gasping at any opportunity to see me.. which she isn't.. am i expecting too much?

now cos i've left it with i'm seeing my friends near her area later and for her to let me know. (which she won't) she'll see it as.. 'oh great he's clingy/needy' this is why i hate using the telephone to make arrangements.. i dont have time to think on the spot what i'm doing.. :-s grrr..

now i guess i have to next her and see if she comes back?

cos right now i'm behaving like a needy clingy afc (which i am) so even tho speculatively we arranged to meet end of next week after her exams she'll still think of me that way unless i dont contact her anymore.. then maybe after that weekend she'll wonder why and think i've lost interest and moved on?

it feels like it's out of my hands.

 

[DJsparky]

There should be no time limit to when you want to send a text. When a man acts on his desires he cancels out all of the bull**** insecurities because in her eyes you are a worthy desiring man who gets what he wants.

So text when your gut tells you to text. If that feeling is now. DO IT.

The whole concept of Wait 3 days is designed to give you the mindset that you are the prize. When you get to a point where you become a great seducer then you can break every rule in the book. The only time i would text in a few days is if i know i have been way TOO available and i feel that in my gut.

Your good to go. Act on your desire. You are free now.

 

[sprint]

ok i fluffed again.. i couldn't control myself and i thought of a bright idea of calling her after i posted just now letting her know i'm going to be in town relatively close to her area and she should come by and to let me know.

she goes 'ok' but then i press her 'so you coming then?' she goes 'no i'll be staying at home.' i dont know why she's telling me ok like shes interested when she isn't.

i can't understand how she lost so much interest pre-phone call till today. maybe some other guy has come into her life i duno. but i would have thought if she was really interested in me she'd be gasping at any opportunity to see me.. which she isn't.. am i expecting too much?

now cos i've left it with i'm seeing my friends near her area later and for her to let me know. (which she won't) she'll see it as.. 'oh great he's clingy/needy' this is why i hate using the telephone to make arrangements.. i dont have time to think on the spot what i'm doing.. :-s grrr..

now i guess i have to next her and see if she comes back?

cos right now i'm behaving like a needy clingy afc (which i am) so even tho speculatively we arranged to meet end of next week after her exams she'll still think of me that way unless i dont contact her anymore.. then maybe after that weekend she'll wonder why and think i've lost interest and moved on?

it feels like it's out of my hands.

why do you over analyze everything sooooo much?
1. It doesn't matter when you reply to a text. do what you want.

2. she probably was actually busy this coming weekend (another date, exams, who knows). therefore she couldn't go out. that doesn't mean she lost interest. you take these things too personally.

3. it's now over between you guys. you called twice within 1 hour. It's not even that you called twice. it's that you called twice about the same thing and to try and get her to go out again. Personally I'm surprised she answered the phone. And then you were trying to pressure her into meeting with you. Furthermore, you didn't even do that the right way. You weren't joking or anything. you were acting needy, desperate, and pathetic.

But you seem to know what you did wrong. just stop making the same mistakes. next time think before you do something.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Did you kiss her on that "first date"?

Everything that happened during your first date, probably can give you more of a clue than your text exchange.

 

[brian123]

Usually i dont respond. I wait until I have a convenient time, then I ask her out then. If the girl likes you, she will go out with you/offer another time. Otherwise her interest level is low.

 

[tsmith2334]

Waiting too long is stupid. It kills all momentum.

And the waiting game is old anyway. Women know about it now. All their old flings used to wait to respond to them too. You're not going to impress them by saying "you're welcome" four days after she was considerate enough to thank you for a fun night.

You were on her mind at the time too, why let it slip away?

I usually reply to those messages in 1-2 hours. Trust me, it's fine.

 

[DonJuan11]

i got a 'thank you for a lovely evening text' at 9pm saturday night (we had a 1st date the night before) so i decided to say 'you're welcome. i had a great time too.' the next day at lunchtime.

BEAUTIFUL. You waited until the next morning and did not respond Sat night, and your response was PERFECT.

now i've tried to make our next arrangements for our next date today but she hasn't got back to me.. can you really wait too long to reply back to a thank you text and for her to judge you for it?

You made it by text? Not the best idea. You should have picked up the phone and called her directly. Text is too ambiguous. You can't hear the voice, the tone, the excitement, its tough to get good read on the girl.

 

[DonJuan11]

ok i fluffed again.. i couldn't control myself and i thought of a bright idea of calling her after i posted just now letting her know i'm going to be in town relatively close to her area and she should come by and to let me know.

Whoa dude. What is this? This doesn't flow with your perfect response earlier. First of all, if you call her, or any girl for that matter, have a specific thing to do with her. Don't just call her to say "hi" or what's up, have a definite plan of action. "I'm going to be in town close to you so come by and let me know" = "I give you the pleasure of meeting with me because my time is very valuable." That doesn't make her feel important, she doesn't feel good about herself here, she doesn't feel like you lifted her up. Instead, you could have said " I happen to be in town for the next little while and I'm be delighted to spend some time with you."

she goes 'ok' but then i press her 'so you coming then?' she goes 'no i'll be staying at home.' i dont know why she's telling me ok like shes interested when she isn't.

"So are you coming then?" = "My happiness depends on seeing you. You have control over my emotions"

i can't understand how she lost so much interest pre-phone call till today. maybe some other guy has come into her life i duno. but i would have thought if she was really interested in me she'd be gasping at any opportunity to see me.. which she isn't.. am i expecting too much?

Gasping at any opportunity to see you? Come on dude, you sound like you look like Brad are God's gift to women. You have to get to her feelings, her emotions, make her excited. I've said it before and I'll say it again, girls don't use logic, they use emotions. What she thought of you 10 min ago is different than what she thinks of you now. One or two wrong moves or words and you are out.

Be polite to her but don't keep calling back and trying to get a hold of her. If she likes, she knows where to find you.

 

[HolyG]

you are overanalyzing, like 75% of the people on this site.

 

[handle]

I don't know how old you are, but most people in my age bracket answer tests pretty quickly. That's just how it is. Yeah yeah, you're too busy to care about it... Bullsh*t. It takes you a few seconds to answer. Get with the program, people are more connected these days.