Can you tell if a woman is looking at you as a safe option vs a high value option?

[itouchyou]

I live in NYC. While ago met a woman that lives in my area. Ivy league educated, very high profile career, has the "happy" gene, blonde, "stacy" type. She's in great shape and has plenty of attractive friends - she herself is pretty attractive. Few years younger than myself and I'm in my mid 30s. As far as I could tell she was interested, but I didn't make a move because of her age, and because I suspected she was promiscuous (I was right, although I don't know to what extent).

Women like her are generally looking for top tier men. I couldn't help but wonder how she perceived me. How would I know, or is it not possible to tell?

 

[Stanley]

Dude you disqualified yourself before you even took a shot at her. That is a buffer to rejection.

Instead of finding a way to rationalize yourself out of making a move on her you should have just done it. Who cares what the h*** she 'may' have been looking for, who cares how she perceives you? The only person that actually cares about that perception is you, quit caring.

Go after what you want and don't shy away from potential rejection.

 

[Michael Chief]

I'm no "top tier man" by society's standards. I'm not tall, rich, handsome, or young. However, I know I have a lot to offer to women. I know what turns them on. I know how to rock their worlds in bed. I know how to be fun. I know how to make them feel great in so many ways not just sexually. I can do things that release a ton of dopamine in their brains by utilizing many different kinds of emotional spikes, and I could make them addicted to me like a drug.

I also know that most men, even if they are tall, handsome, rich, and young, don't know how to do what I can do.

It doesn't even matter if she can't perceive all that value I have to offer at first because I also have game, which can eventually let her see all that.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I couldn't help but wonder how she perceived me. How would I know, or is it not possible to tell?

If she wants to be constantly wined and dined, she's looking for the safe/provider option. If she assesses your assets like they are hers, she's looking for the safe/provider type.

If she goes out of her way to do things for you and tries to please you in bed, she sees you as someone she doesn't want to lose.

 

[Michael Chief]

You didn’t make a move because it was your gut telling you not to. Always trust your gut.

Back in my day we called this Approach Anxiety, and what we were supposed to do was to not trust that anxiety, and just approach.

No, it wasn't a gut instinct giving him some warning about her being too this or too that. It was classic approach anxiety and low confidence, followed by his ego backwards rationalizing why he didn't approach someone he initially felt attracted to with a bunch of bullsh!t.

 

[Gamisch]

Way too many what ifs.

No knock on OP but how you expect to know the answer if you never even talked to her "like that"?

Most women want you because of a combination of those factors . They sell us a dream( consistent sex for example) and we return the favor by selling them a dream as well( certain lifestyle ect).

If you are a certain age( 30+) and you want a certain type of woman ( hb7 and up) you MUST assume she wants a combination of looks money status and game.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

You didn’t make a move because it was your gut telling you not to. Always trust your gut.

If your gut warns you of impending danger, yes.
If your gut warns you of not approaching a woman, no. Most likely anxiety driven, no real risks.

 

[Michael Chief]

If your gut warns you of impending danger, yes.
If your gut warns you of not approaching a woman, no. Most likely anxiety driven, no real risks.

 

[itouchyou]

Back in my day we called this Approach Anxiety, and what we were supposed to do was to not trust that anxiety, and just approach.

No, it wasn't a gut instinct giving him some warning about her being too this or too that. It was classic approach anxiety and low confidence, followed by his ego backwards rationalizing why he didn't approach someone he initially felt attracted to with a bunch of bullsh!t.

how about no.

her type is the classic nyc career type thats single into her 30s and hypermasculine feminist. yea she's attractive and friendly, but she admitted she was into hookup culture in a very direct way.

my gut was right.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I live in NYC. While ago met a woman that lives in my area. Ivy league educated, very high profile career, has the "happy" gene, blonde, "stacy" type. She's in great shape and has plenty of attractive friends - she herself is pretty attractive. Few years younger than myself and I'm in my mid 30s. As far as I could tell she was interested, but I didn't make a move because of her age, and because I suspected she was promiscuous (I was right, although I don't know to what extent).

Women like her are generally looking for top tier men. I couldn't help but wonder how she perceived me. How would I know, or is it not possible to tell?

I mean that's a win win...means she is easy to fvck and is only worth a FWB, so you bang her and then keep looking to add better to the pipeline if you want someone with higher quality.

IMO, I don't believe you get higher quality women by sitting on the sidelines for lengthy periods of time, I believe you get them by being in the game and becoming better at it.

Would be like taking time off as a pro athlete and coming back after a year and expecting to be better than you were when you stopped. That just doesn't happen and it doesn't make much sense to me. We have many examples of this via injury, suspensions and other reasons. I cannot think of a single instance where the player came back better than they were when they stopped playing initially.

Very very rare you are going to go from dating nobody for lengthy periods of time to dating an 8.5. Much more likely you go from dating a 6 to a 7 to a 8 to an 8.5.

 

[Tilex]

You live in NYC, where the rate of rent is the highest in North America.
It's higher than Canada, Mexico, and the rest of the United States combined.
You live in one of the EASIEST dating markets in the entire world and you have doubts about a chick because you believe she's promiscuous?

I can't believe what I'm reading........
Try gaming chicks in Miami with that mentality.

I mean you're really disqualifying yourself in a dating market where the women are literally throwing themselves at you. It doesn't get any easier than NYC my friend.