Can you help an asian guy out?

[GoodForm]

I'm probably the most americanised asian there is. A bit of background, the 'token asian' of the group, I'm a surfer, have tatts and pretty fit with an acne problem (working on fixing that) Problem is I prefer 'white' chicks. It's just asian girls kinda remind me of my mum and I have had bad dating experiences with asian girls but in the day.

My last relationship (HB 7 from Denmark) lasted a couple months before we became official and in a few weeks it was over because I was your full blown AFC. Then I found this site and things in life helped make me a better man. I started clubbing became much more social and things were going great in terms of my social life and meeting girls etc. But it just didn't feel right and I wasn't happy so I quit the night life (and so went friends whom I went out with). I also switched jobs so the added perks of a job where the manager hired good looking HB's was gone too.

Now I spend my days studying, surfing and working as a surf instructor. Social life is still good in that I already had a lot of friends and continually catch up with them (particularly the girls who are always keen). My plates I use to spin are all gone. I am quite focussed on study and the likes of bettering myself. Pretty happy with it all except my HB problems. The good part is I am past my days of AFC/ oneitis or getting rejected so that stuff doesn't bother me anymore.

It's just when most of your mates are in relationships, you do feel pressured wondering what about yourself. It's even harder because the amount of times I've been rejected is why it doesn't bother me anymore. I feel even stupider because if I was to go after asian chicks, it'd be pretty easy (I know because I tried as an experiment) but I'm just not attracted to them. Give me a 'white' HB6 and I'd choose her over an asian HB9 any day (It's probably more the cultural thing too as I just don't fit in with them anymore).

Is there something wrong with me guys? Any tips on fixing my HB problems? Cheers all for reading through it all.

 

[loveshogun]

I'm an Asian guy. I date only white women. Do you have a specific question?

And no, don't base your own happiness on what other people have. That's a social phenomena that is well documented, and even causes billionaires to feel unhappy - my advice for you is to ignore any and all "grass is greener" feelings you ever get.

Make your choices based on your situation, not based on what you think of others' situations.

***UPDATE***
I don't date only white women - I've dated Asians too, and even a few black girls on one or two dates. Predominantly white women, though. Like, 90 percent.

 

[sighsigh]

I would give my left nut to have the "in" with asian women that you have.

I feel ya'. I mean I don't have trouble getting with Asian girls so it's not a huge deal, but I do feel that Asian guys have a major advantage in gaming Asian girls. Asian girls more than anything will feel instantly comfortable with a guy of the same race as them and will gravitate towards them. It's SO much easier to meet Asians if you're Asian yourself. (I'm mainly talking about Asian girls who are not completely whitewashed... the whitewashed ones tend to mix more). I see plenty of thoroughly ugly, thoroughly AFC Asian guys hanging out with attractive Asian chicks and it's solely because they have the race aspect in common. Solely.

I always found it weird that Asian guys put white girls on a pedestal... while me being a white guy finds white girls unattractive and solely goes for Asian girls. You guys have a gift and you squander it.

 

[Iceberg]

It's just when most of your mates are in relationships, you do feel pressured wondering what about yourself. It's even harder because the amount of times I've been rejected is why it doesn't bother me anymore. I feel even stupider because if I was to go after asian chicks, it'd be pretty easy (I know because I tried as an experiment) but I'm just not attracted to them. Give me a 'white' HB6 and I'd choose her over an asian HB9 any day (It's probably more the cultural thing too as I just don't fit in with them anymore).

Is there something wrong with me guys? Any tips on fixing my HB problems? Cheers all for reading through it all.

I'd say this - Seeing my friends in relationships makes me feel no pressure whatsoever.

Perhaps this is off topic, and perhaps it isn't, but those people in relationships will talk about "love" as if it's some once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. As if it's so hard to come by....so rare. And who did these friends of yours end up settling down with? Some girl they met at the local bar, some girl they knew in high school, some girl from their home town.

It's not lie they scoured the globe on this search for adventure, glory, and love. They put it very little work and settled for whoever was closest and most convenient. The lowest hanging fruit.

By holding out and focusing on your goals and improving yourself, you're the one that THEY should be envious of. Because while these guys are on the verge of marrying some girl who grew up within a 1 mile radius of them, you have the entire world open to you. No ball and chain. Nothing holding you back.

Sorry to go on a rant, but that's my philosophy on "Worrying about friends who are in relationships".

 

[shizz702]

I'd say this - Seeing my friends in relationships makes me feel no pressure whatsoever.

Perhaps this is off topic, and perhaps it isn't, but those people in relationships will talk about "love" as if it's some once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. As if it's so hard to come by....so rare. And who did these friends of yours end up settling down with? Some girl they met at the local bar, some girl they knew in high school, some girl from their home town.

It's not lie they scoured the globe on this search for adventure, glory, and love. They put it very little work and settled for whoever was closest and most convenient. The lowest hanging fruit.

By holding out and focusing on your goals and improving yourself, you're the one that THEY should be envious of. Because while these guys are on the verge of marrying some girl who grew up within a 1 mile radius of them, you have the entire world open to you. No ball and chain. Nothing holding you back.

Sorry to go on a rant, but that's my philosophy on "Worrying about friends who are in relationships".

Very solid post ice.

I particularly like the "lowest hanging fruit" analogy.

I agree here. No need to settle for less. Haste makes waste and why not enjoy life and experience it before taking the plunge?