But I want a 'nice girl'!!!

[Triple X]

I dont get this. Sure, I've read all the stuff now about how women don't want 'nice guys'.. they are attracted to jerks etc etc... so yeah, I understand that part.

But what I don't understand is WHY?!?!



I'll explain what I mean. See I love very attractive women, as we all do, but what I want above all else is an attractive woman who is 'nice'. You know what I mean??

I mean good-looking women with moderate-very *****y personalities are ten a penny, but the ones with great looks and personas too are very rare thing indeed.

I'm looking for a woman who is a 'nice girl'. By that I mean loving, caring and someone who would actually give a sh*t about my feelings, ie never cheating/lying etc... to me those qualities are very attractive in a woman.

I don't mean weak, insecure etc... but to me some of the traits of a 'nice guy' are certainly attractive in a 'nice girl'. For this I mean for LTRs BTW not one-night stands, obviously.

For example I never used to fancy Pamela Anderson (or I just thought she was a plastic b*tch and I dismissed her as such). But recently I discovered she is actively and passionately campaigning against animal cruelty and she has proved herself to have a real big heart.

Now this may not apply to all you guys on here, but for me her sex appeal rocketed. I now consider her very attractive indeed and would certainly bang the sh*t out of her.

So what I wanna know is... why do women find these 'nice' traits so UNattractive?!? I mean Pam may have a good heart and all but at the end of the day she is still f***ing Tommy Boy, with his woman-beating habits and criminal record. WTF??

Can anyone enlighten me as to why things are different for women? Are men supposed to be the cold, unfeeling and tough ones in the relationship while the women take care of the sensitive stuff? I'd appreciate all replies (and maybe any women on here can help answer this question for me??) Thanx.

 

[FatsTheScrapper]

What Pam wants is not neccessarily Tommy's tattoos and certainly not his criminal record.

What she wants is a Strong man. Strong in his beliefs and strong in his actions.

The 'nice' traits that Nice Guys have are percieved as weak. Putting other people first. Trying to appease people. It's not exciting and not attractive.

You gotta throw a monkey wrench in people's daily existences by being C+F. The trick is not coming off like a total a$$hole.

You just gotta figure a way to open yourself up and take some risks. When you begin to break the boring existence of daily life, then you've got yourself something.

 

[Triple X]

Yeah I understand what ur saying. But I don't mean the fact that women want 'strong men' is wrong... the thing is tho there are plenty of strong men but women are more attracted to the *******S...

I mean the people that treat them like sh*t. The ones that hit them, cheat on them, disrespect them etc... it seems to be these traits more than the 'strong' traits that are appealing to them. As I said there are plenty of strong men but the *******S always get more women.

Going back to Pam... I mean she can have (practically) any man she wants. She could leave Tommy at the drop of a hat and find another equally 'strong' man, without the traits of being a complete thug and a jerk no problem. But she stays with him.

Its the whole 'Bad Boy' thing. I guess they associate being 'bad' with exciting, adventurous etc.. being 'strong' is irrelevant. You can be both a strong and a really 'nice' person, but.. I have no doubt your girl will leave you for a jerk as soon as one comes along.

Just like I find loving and warm traits attractive in a woman, they find the cold and sh*tty traits attractive in men. WHY?!?

 

[FatsTheScrapper]

I think the problem is your perception of these '*******s.'

You say that the guys that cheat, hit, and disrespect their girlfriends are the ones that get all the women. I say that is not true. The only woman that would stay with a guy like that is one that is terribly insecure. She needs Any kind of attention she can get, good or bad. That's certainly not the type of chick I'm looking for (even for a one-nighter).

But I don't think those types of cases are the rule...rather they are the exception.

Sure Pam could have nearly any guy she wants. But what separates the guys she wants from the guys she doesn't want is mostly attitude. Tommy's public image is one of a ****y a@shole, but I would bet dollars to donuts that in private he's got a competely different side to him.

Women don't seek the cold and ****ty traits of men, what the seek are the traits that stir up their existence, to add to it. ****y and funny do that. They add tension and relief to life that makes it more dynamic and exciting.

Once you can figure out how to mind-fvck a chick without even touching her, she's yours.

 

[nonstop]

she wants a guy that would kill another guy to protect her and her children.

or in todays world, atleast stand up for them when the **** hits the fan.

women want to be protected.

a nice guy can't do that.

unless he's rich.

 

[Lifeforce]

Women want different things depending on what traits they have themselves. This is very important to know all you alpha-male-is-everything-guys. They seem to work the same way as we do in some way.

I consider myself a nice guy, I listen to people, care for my friends and help them if it get tough, pretty open with my emotions. I look for a good girl to be in a relationship with. But why do girls want me and not another nice guy? The difference is the perspective of a nice guy and me. I don't give a **** what women think about me, I do stuff for me, I don't walk on eggshells around women. I'm confident in myself and my abilites, and I'm confident in my ability to attract women, I'm in control of life, I'm happy and make my happiness, not vice versa. A nice guy isn't. He is insecure, self absorbed, kicked around by life, etc...

so IMO all this alpha male **** is pretty worthless, nice guys can be very attractive to others as long as you take out the damn weakness from it. Niceness is not masked-insecurity, niceness is not something you do to impress others, it is a part of your personality, and you are nice because you feel like it. If you are nice because you are afraid of conflict, are insecure or to impress then you are a "lame-Guy" and as we all know, lame guys finishes last.

 

[Triple X]

Problem is... most people confuse niceness with weakness..