Brings kid on first date

[_sideways_]

Ok....here we go ..
Was at the supermarket. Saw a cutie. Got her number.
Texted back and forth for about a week or two...don't remember.
She says she is really busy all the time but is free Friday night. Ok.
Go pick her up at coffee shop near her place ( I found that out later).
I'm thinking no big deal...first date...doesn't want me to know where she lives.
As I'm pulling up....she's there with her like 6 or 7 year old daughter.
This girl is 25. In my head I go... I guess we don't need to have that conversation anymore.
So I took it as that. She just wanted to rip the band aid off real quick. So we went to the mall. Walked around and had like chicken and fries. Nothing much to do.
Second date happens later on and no kid...straight to my place. Sex...no food cuz I just moved in...just beer for her....rum for me. No TV ...no furniture lol
All the entertainment was her cell phone music.
So the kid on first date still puzzles me.

 

[BMX]

She let some loser nut in her and now you are the responsible guy she wants to settle down with to atone for her poor judgement?

 

[RickTheToad]

Ok....here we go ..
Was at the supermarket. Saw a cutie. Got her number.
Texted back and forth for about a week or two...don't remember.
She says she is really busy all the time but is free Friday night. Ok.
Go pick her up at coffee shop near her place ( I found that out later).
I'm thinking no big deal...first date...doesn't want me to know where she lives.
As I'm pulling up....she's there with her like 6 or 7 year old daughter.
This girl is 25. In my head I go... I guess we don't need to have that conversation anymore.
So I took it as that. She just wanted to rip the band aid off real quick. So we went to the mall. Walked around and had like chicken and fries. Nothing much to do.
Second date happens later on and no kid...straight to my place. Sex...no food cuz I just moved in...just beer for her....rum for me. No TV ...no furniture lol
All the entertainment was her cell phone music.
So the kid on first date still puzzles me.

Be careful dude... You shouldn't be dating single moms at your age anyway. Don't waste your youth on single moms.

 

[_sideways_]

I'm 40.

 

[_sideways_]

She let some loser nut in her and now you are the responsible guy she wants to settle down with to atone for her poor judgement?

IDK.
I asked what the deal was. Said she was married. He turned abusive.

 

[RickTheToad]

I'm 40.

Why are you dating single moms?

 

[f283000]

At 40 you should be in your prime (if you have taken care of yourself) if not you should be hitting the gym and improving your physique and date younger. I'm 38 my last 2 girls were 21 and 22 and I dumped both of them once i got tired of them.

Ok....here we go ..
Was at the supermarket. Saw a cutie. Got her number.
Texted back and forth for about a week or two...don't remember.
She says she is really busy all the time but is free Friday night. Ok.
Go pick her up at coffee shop near her place ( I found that out later).
I'm thinking no big deal...first date...doesn't want me to know where she lives.
As I'm pulling up....she's there with her like 6 or 7 year old daughter.
This girl is 25. In my head I go... I guess we don't need to have that conversation anymore.
So I took it as that. She just wanted to rip the band aid off real quick. So we went to the mall. Walked around and had like chicken and fries. Nothing much to do.
Second date happens later on and no kid...straight to my place. Sex...no food cuz I just moved in...just beer for her....rum for me. No TV ...no furniture lol
All the entertainment was her cell phone music.
So the kid on first date still puzzles me.

Me personally if I had seen that I would have given her a call and asked her what's up with she bringing her child to the date. That to me is un-acceptable. I would have just left. I think you got lucky you were able to smash on the second date but I just hope she showing you her kid too early doesn't mean she wants to set you up as the step dad down the line. You need to set some boundaries and let her know you are not taking care of her kid and there's going to be no more "family" dates.

 

[_sideways_]

Why are you dating single moms?

I didn't know she was a mom until I picked her up.

 

[_sideways_]

At 40 you should be in your prime (if you have taken care of yourself) if not you should be hitting the gym and improving your physique and date younger. I'm 38 my last 2 girls were 21 and 22 and I dumped both of them once i got tired of them.

Me personally if I had seen that I would have given her a call and asked her what's up with she bringing her child to the date. That to me is un-acceptable. I would have just left. I think you got lucky you were able to smash on the second date but I just hope she showing you her kid too early doesn't mean she wants to set you up as the step dad down the line. You need to set some boundaries and let her know you are not taking care of her kid and there's going to be no more "family" dates.

Yea... I've kept up my appearance. She thought I was 28.
Second and third date was no family dates.
I was just really wanting to know...what would go through your guys heads or has that ever happened.

 

[Black Widow Void]

I find it interesting that some of the above replies aren't addressing your question, but instead they are using your posting as an attempt to inadvertently make themselves look 'better.' Remember that and consider the sources ....

I've got to hand it to you.
You beat the odds on this one. After bringing her kid a long (and unannounced) on the first date, I would not have bet that this would lead to a 2nd date lay. Congratulations on that.

Although I can't conclude why she brought her kid along on the first date, I'll share my thoughts about something else. Take a look at her motherhood. She had no proof beforehand that there would be a 2nd date with you. Yet, it would seem as if she's willing to subject her young daughter to a man (and let's be honest, probably men) that could appear on one date and never appear again. That's fine for an adult woman, but is this healthy to a child or a good example of her motherhood?

In my experience, I've found that women this careless in their parenting skills aren't worth much investment (if I can't respect them, then they are basically defined as "casual and fun" only). Of course, to each their own.. but you'll typically find that women who are more protective of their children to be of higher caliber.

 

[f283000]

I find it interesting that some of the above replies aren't addressing your question, but instead they are using your posting as an attempt to inadvertently make themselves look 'better.' Remember that and consider the sources ....

What you consider "making themselves look better" others would consider motivating their fellow man to get what he deserves and should be going after because sometimes it takes other men to show you what's possible from what they're getting. Stop judging other men we are trying to help unless you want us to sugarcoat our replies.

I was just really wanting to know...what would go through your guys heads or has that ever happened.

I'd be scared to be honest i would think of it as a huge red flag because any self respecting woman will not go on a first date with her kid to meet a stranger. That screams irresponsible/careless/mental health issues to me to be honest and i'd be sure to wear that condom real well if fkn her.

 

[Black Widow Void]

What you consider "making themselves look better" others would consider motivating their fellow man to get what he deserves and should be going after because sometimes it takes other men to show you what's possible from what they're getting. Stop judging other men we are trying to help unless you want us to sugarcoat our replies.

Because we all know that when someone addresses a concern/question as listed below

So the kid on first date still puzzles me.

That the best answer is going to be from a forum member that appears focused on prancing his image to a bunch of forum members (male internet strangers, of all people) .

I'm 38 my last 2 girls were 21 and 22 and I dumped both of them once i got tired of them.

 

[_sideways_]

I find it interesting that some of the above replies aren't addressing your question, but instead they are using your posting as an attempt to inadvertently make themselves look 'better.' Remember that and consider the sources ....

I've got to hand it to you.
You beat the odds on this one. After bringing her kid a long (and unannounced) on the first date, I would not have bet that this would lead to a 2nd date lay. Congratulations on that.

Although I can't conclude why she brought her kid along on the first date, I'll share my thoughts about something else. Take a look at her motherhood. She had no proof beforehand that there would be a 2nd date with you. Yet, it would seem as if she's willing to subject her young daughter to a man (and let's be honest, probably men) that could appear on one date and never appear again. That's fine for an adult woman, but is this healthy to a child or a good example of her motherhood?

In my experience, I've found that women this careless in their parenting skills aren't worth much investment (if I can't respect them, then they are basically defined as "casual and fun" only). Of course, to each their own.. but you'll typically find that women who are more protective of their children to be of higher caliber.

I really thought her babysitter cancelled and she really wanted to see me.
Big ego. Because it's true....she shouldn't bring her kid because it's an impressionable kid. Last couple of times she came over, she wouldn't kiss me because she said her kid is watching. IDK.
In any event...we had an argument and we both are going silent.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Why are you dating single moms?

I have kids. Im in my mid 40s. If I am dating someone in their mid 30s or older that doesn't have kids I think something is wrong with them. Or worse they want to have kids and I am not that guy.

Nothing is wrong with dating single Mom's, 2 of the best relationships of my life were with single Mom's.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Nothing is wrong with dating single Mom's, 2 of the best relationships of my life were with single Mom's.

For childless men, everything is wrong with dating single moms.

 

[dude99]

Ok....here we go ..
Was at the supermarket. Saw a cutie. Got her number.
Texted back and forth for about a week or two...don't remember.
She says she is really busy all the time but is free Friday night. Ok.
Go pick her up at coffee shop near her place ( I found that out later).
I'm thinking no big deal...first date...doesn't want me to know where she lives.
As I'm pulling up....she's there with her like 6 or 7 year old daughter.
This girl is 25. In my head I go... I guess we don't need to have that conversation anymore.
So I took it as that. She just wanted to rip the band aid off real quick. So we went to the mall. Walked around and had like chicken and fries. Nothing much to do.
Second date happens later on and no kid...straight to my place. Sex...no food cuz I just moved in...just beer for her....rum for me. No TV ...no furniture lol
All the entertainment was her cell phone music.
So the kid on first date still puzzles me.

Unless you told her (and i don't know why you would) to bring the kid, that should be an immediate next.

 

[dude99]

I'm 40.

She is looking to have you take the role of step daddy. Maybe step daddy number 2 maybe 3??

 

[Black Widow Void]

I really thought her babysitter cancelled and she really wanted to see me.
Big ego. Because it's true....she shouldn't bring her kid because it's an impressionable kid. Last couple of times she came over, she wouldn't kiss me because she said her kid is watching. IDK.
In any event...we had an argument and we both are going silent.

Her behavior does seem a bit contradictory If the argument works itself through, then perhaps you can ask her why she brought her child along on the first date.

 

[RickTheToad]

I have kids. Im in my mid 40s. If I am dating someone in their mid 30s or older that doesn't have kids I think something is wrong with them. Or worse they want to have kids and I am not that guy.

Nothing is wrong with dating single Mom's, 2 of the best relationships of my life were with single Mom's.

Yea, there is if you do not have your own kids. Your situation is a bit different than the OP's dude.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yea, there is if you do not have your own kids. Your situation is a bit different than the OP's dude.

I avoid blanket statements... you'll end making a lot of bad decisions in your life that way.