Boring Sex with your GF / How to make it work?

[Mertz09]

@Learning Curve - Please don't take it personally, but I've never had any sort of problem like this. I've had multiple medium and long term relationships so there has been plenty of opportunity for problems like this to creep up, yet its never happened.

So what are you doing or not doing? What part do you play that might be causing this?

I guarantee you here are the reasons I don't have these problems:

-I certainly never ask a woman for what I want in the bedroom, I simply tell her or direct her. Women like men to lead and when you do they submit easier and are happier to do so.
-I set the tone of what type of sex transpires(p0rn star, rough, loving, passionate, etc).
-I have my way with women. I position them how I want, and they love it.
-I push boundaries.
-I do every position in the Kama Sutra.
-Sex toys are fun.
-New locations: parking garages on the top level, hotel room windows, adult video store, in the woods, in public, parking lot.
-I set the expectation.
-I'm very adventurous, pretty much nothing is off limits.
-Her pleasure is as important as mine. I always make sure she is satisfied.
-I always have candles going in the bedroom.
-I let her know how her sexy body turns me on.
-If you think penetration and no ****oral stimulation makes you great, you need to expand your skill set.
-Sex always lasts longer than 30min. I can go 3hrs.
-Sometimes I'll beat that pu$$y up so bad that she'll be sore the next day and loving it.
-I call them my personal wh0re/kum slut whatever when I'm pulling her hair.

I've always looked at sex as I'm the one that runs the show. All I need is a willing participant to follow my lead. If I do a good job it falls into place and we are both very satisfied.

I agree . Do your homework Gentlemen.

 

[Divorced w 3]

We are going to shoot for every hour this Saturday while our eyes are open. I’ll keep you posted.

 

[Mertz09]

My hack for this, especially in the 40-50's range: DATE GYM BUNNIES.

They love their bodies and feel sexy because they're in good shape and understand attraction and the value of physicality. My current thang is Gen X and her body easily trumps that of 95% of 20 somethings and 99% of 30-somethings...and sex with her and those who have come before her is easily the best sex ever. A man also needs to understand the concept of reactive desire and your responsibility in maintaining the sexual vibe.

If you're out and about and your hands aren't on her body and hers on your's you're wrong.

If you want great sex select women with a strong submissive streak as well, you can draw the kumslut out of her if you are skilled.

My current thang is amazing, she texts me nonstop about sex, how shes sore, how such and such was so amazing last time, she goes home after a 4 hour session and texts and tell she shes swollen and horny - that has turned into her coming back in the wee hours many times for another round, it's easy if you have strong chemistry.

I think many people do not actually know what it's like to have that level of attraction for one another.

When you go out have sex in bathrooms, or semi-publically.

If youre at a bar go out to the car and have her blow you and ride you in the back seat.

If you're out for a hike in the wilderness pull her off the trail and bend her over for a quickie.

Have sex on the beach.

Care about her pleasure, ensure her orgasms.

You have to desire her, and if you cannot get it up to do these things you're not attracted enough even in your 50's.

So many of you are conflicted about this and do not understand the Madonna/Wh0re complex. You rip on women for their sexuality and want a girl thats pure as driven snow, but you then complain when shes not sexual enough. If you're skilled and wise you can turn an otherwise sheltered woman into your slut. There are things that can assure you have a good sex life, but there are no real shortcuts, you need to put the work in. Again it's easy if you have burning chemistry.

p.s. read @The Duke 's post its platinum.

I’ll say it again. “Do your Homework Gentlemen”

 

[inquisitor]

Modern women are not easy too put into this type of polarity

And not only must you put her there you must also actively keep her there

It's no shock many men suffer from dead bedroom

If it is not easy to put a woman in such a polarized state, then maybe one is looking at the wrong woman.

There are a lot of women who are desirable, AND are able to submit to you, but only once you are able to assert your identity and your needs every day, will it work long-term.

 

[inquisitor]

reminds me, plenty of guys i've spoken to, they have said that have had some more enjoyable/fun sex, with escorts or sex workers, providers, than they did with their ex-girlfriends/ex-wives.

It is more due to the novelty and associated excitement with the experience, than being "not the girlfriend/wife".

We enjoy new stuff, doesn't matter what the stuff is. It's not more enjoyable, just a breath of fresh air, that is frankly unnecessary when you're able to respect, support, and also dominate your woman anyway.

 

[inquisitor]

How do you turn an "otherwise sheltered woman" into a slut?

My current GF does not have any experience in the bedroom.

Sex is good, but not good enough for my taste. She is sexy as f1uck so I don't have any problems getting hard or enjoying sex most of the time.

I know that spicing things up and changing places, positions, and making it interesting will work.

The challenge is that she finds all this things funny or sarcastic. She does not take good s3x seriously.

I never had this encounter before. It's weird. If I ask for anal, she is a no-go but if we have sex and I finger her ass she does not complain.

I know that one thing and another are different but I never met a woman who I can suggest different sex stuff or weird things and she finds me weird and she laughs and does not take anything seriously. This shows immature behaviour from her side and zero experience.

I'm sure her EX boyfriends were horrible in bed. I can imagine from what she told me.

Following your logic,
1. She does not have experience.
2. You know more about sex than her.
3. The sex is not good enough.

Seems that she's not the issue here. Maybe she's just testing you. So what if these are funny or weird to her? You want better sex for the both of you, so assert that. Stop asking her - she doesn't know a damn thing.

 

[Divorced w 3]

How do you turn an "otherwise sheltered woman" into a slut?

You make her *** so hard that she thinks her back muscles spasmed out. Slowly but surely just keep moving her forward into all the stuff that turns you on and she will go along for the ride. You need to go down on her, you need to work yourself in there slowly, get a sense of the tone of the situation and then you can ramp it up. She needs you to make her feel safe. Don’t worry right now about getting your deepest fantasies off you are laying the foundation for the long game. Do all the stuff that keeps her close to you physically so you can connect her emotional experience to the physical, you need to train her brain to equate you being close to her with you breaking her vag open. The **** is your best friend. Suggested starting points would be on your side spooning, keep her close to you. Or, you could simply Christian Gray her and hit her doggy but you need to not force it in there and then you can start speeding it up. If you’re going to go right for the doggy you better be giving off dominant vibes but she will be eating out of your hand if you do this properly. Have her drop on the floor and blow you after you bust in her doing that.

 

[CornbreadFed]

to each their own, tons of men would disagree and have had awesome experiences.

That tells me a lot about that man and it’s not a good impression either.

 

[Mertz09]

With all other women you're paying with your time and money (indirectly).

All women will claim the same about guys dating/marrying younger women. - He can't handle a real woman/What do they have in common - shout in chorus the 35-45yrs old, past the wall and saddled with baggage women.
In reality, in both situations, they are just bad mouthing their competition.

“With all other women you're paying with your time and money (indirectly).”
i’ve heard this, most of my adult life and must agree.

 

[Murk]

Role playing always works for me. Also tying them up, recording it.

Tbh sex with my ex became a chore when she wanted kids and I didn’t so I cheated on her and ended it.

 

[Learning Curve]

You make her *** so hard that she thinks her back muscles spasmed out. Slowly but surely just keep moving her forward into all the stuff that turns you on and she will go along for the ride. You need to go down on her, you need to work yourself in there slowly, get a sense of the tone of the situation and then you can ramp it up. She needs you to make her feel safe. Don’t worry right now about getting your deepest fantasies off you are laying the foundation for the long game. Do all the stuff that keeps her close to you physically so you can connect her emotional experience to the physical, you need to train her brain to equate you being close to her with you breaking her vag open. The **** is your best friend. Suggested starting points would be on your side spooning, keep her close to you. Or, you could simply Christian Gray her and hit her doggy but you need to not force it in there and then you can start speeding it up. If you’re going to go right for the doggy you better be giving off dominant vibes but she will be eating out of your hand if you do this properly. Have her drop on the floor and blow you after you bust in her doing that.

Good points. Thanks.

Most of the things you mentioned are already in place.