Boom. Done. Just like that.

[dashiznick]

I appreciate the help from my bros in the community breaking this one down:

Got a number from the barista at my favorite Starbucks (which I can't go back to any more dammit). Hit her up with a call the next evening and set up for date 1 which goes well. Feels like we're connecting and she admits to me how she's been waiting for me to ask her out for weeks etc. etc.

We do random small text exchanges over the next three days and set up another date. Connecting well again, she says she's talked to her parents about me and I'm sure she's very into me. We kiss very passionately before we part ways after date 2. Texts me back immediately afterwards, something along the lines of "...kissing you is hot..." I text back "next time will be better."

The next day we set something up for the following day (a Thurs) and at the last minute she cancels on me saying she's too tired and has to work early. That Friday she shoots me a text, and being a little tipsy I send her back some awkward inconsequential response. No contact on Saturday.

Now it's Sunday, I've asked her if she wanted to grab dinner on her Tues night off, and received no response and now I'm in NC mode.

My question to the audience is: "WTF?"

Lesson learned: I know I broke cardinal rule of frequent contact, but I thought I was riding a huge momentum wave. Momentum means Jacksh!t apparently.

 

[PlayHer Man]

F*ck first.. analyze later.

This rule needs to be carved in STONE somewhere. Until you f*ck a girl.. there is no reason to put much thought into anything she does. You start considering a "relationship" AFTER you f*ck her.

Women can smell FEAR... and based on this post.. you reeked of fear and canned PUA tricks from the start. Trying to manipulate women is a beta move. Understand that either she wants to f*ck your brains out OR she doesn't. Its never more complex than that.

And what's this horse sh!t about you can't go back to your favorite Starbucks now? Are you f*cking serious? F*ck her.. go there every day man!

I had one situation where I picked up this girl at the Subway restaurant near my job. She flaked on the first date with no excuse so I didn't call her again. But I kept going to that Subway.. because I was f*cking hungry. She eventually quit working there. :crackup: :crackup:

Most men are afraid of women. Why? I don't know.. but its gay.

 

[Zarky]

as usual, hitting on the help comes to an unfulfilling end. Though props to you for getting even 2 dates out of her.

 

[floydb25]

Like I always say - too much, too soon. Just because she shows high interest initially, and is head over heels, and eager to see you - does NOT mean everything is in the bag, and you can "ride the momentum" - by setting up all these back to back dates and revealing your interest, etc. This is how I used to mess up, too. Within a matter of weeks, they all lost interest - even though they initiated, approached, contacted, etc. I reciprocated too much of their interest, and they lost theirs. Yes, that's how it works.

No matter where they're at - YOU keep the game where it's supposed to be, and don't become complacent / over-eager / predictable. Just because THEY pursue, text constantly, show high interest, etc - doesn't mean you do the same thing, or otherwise get ahead of yourself.

This applies to relationships, as well. Just because they're pushing for one, acting all lovey dovey, etc - does not mean YOU rush into relationship mode, become too comfortable, and start showing all this interest - or else they'll lose theirs.

 

[dashiznick]

Awesome responses. Definitely needed the third party perspectives.

I thought my equal responses were justified. But now I know that chicks can be friggin sneaky.

I actually wasn't as into her at first, but it just shows that I got outplayed. Definitely a lot left for me to learn.

I'm not too broken up about this one--just disappointed because I thought I had a HB-7 all but bagged.

F--- it, I'm gonna let the dust settle for a couple weeks then get a goddamn trenta iced coffee from my favorite Starbucks! LOL.

 

[jay07]

You go back to that starbucks, when you kno shes working. And when you go up to order, you pretend like nothing ever happend. Shell try to make excuses cause shell feel awkward but you get your crap and you walk out with your pride. And when she texts you hit delete.

 

[like2jam]

That sucks man. It's weird and you never know why exactly. From your first post, it sounds like things were going well. If she said 'kissing you is hot' after date 2, then it makes even less sense, but we cannot rely on sense. Most of the time there is simply no explanation to be had.

I would definitely go back to that Starbucks though.

 

[SgtSplacker]

You can't give up your game just because a pretty girl acts like she digs you!

Their minds change like the wind, leaving a male mind that is not so easily changed wondering what happened.

Girls let themselves give into infatuation, if a guy does that it just looks beta.

Plate theory exists to remedy this.

Either spin plates, or learn how to pace these HOs!

 

[cordoncordon]

F*ck first.. analyze later.

This rule needs to be carved in STONE somewhere. Until you f*ck a girl.. there is no reason to put much thought into anything she does. You start considering a "relationship" AFTER you f*ck her.

Women can smell FEAR... and based on this post.. you reeked of fear and canned PUA tricks from the start. Trying to manipulate women is a beta move. Understand that either she wants to f*ck your brains out OR she doesn't. Its never more complex than that.

And what's this horse sh!t about you can't go back to your favorite Starbucks now? Are you f*cking serious? F*ck her.. go there every day man!

I had one situation where I picked up this girl at the Subway restaurant near my job. She flaked on the first date with no excuse so I didn't call her again. But I kept going to that Subway.. because I was f*cking hungry. She eventually quit working there. :crackup: :crackup:

Most men are afraid of women. Why? I don't know.. but its gay.

Agree with everything^^^^^

 

[dashiznick]

UPDATE: She texts me this morning saying she has a funeral to attend so won't be available for Tues. My next step? I think I will continue NC until she makes the next move.

 

[jay07]

Wait til she contacts you again or shell keep playing these games with you. Shes taken you as weak, prove to her youre not.

 

[PlayHer Man]

What exactly do you want from this girl?

 

[dashiznick]

PlayHer_Man:

The same thing from every girl I've dated; If there's a physical attraction, bang it out. If there's an emotional connection, a steady relationship (which I thought was starting to happen).

 

[GetFit66]

Go back to that Starbucks every damn ****ing day, give her no mind. Pick up other hoes, burn her brains out, but key is to not be too obvious. Go with friends have a nice ****ing time. When she contacts you, act like who are you hoe

Win???

 

[Demonpenz]

Tell her the next funeral she is going to be at is her own.

 

[dashiznick]

Guys, hate to Frankenstein this post, but I'm trying to figure out the next move and need some expert opinions :cheer: if I can get them:

To summarize previous posts, had two AWESOME dates with this girl (who was my barista) to which we parted with a make-out sesh after date 2.

Planned something three days later which she called me to bail on last minute. Asked her out again the next day and she replied saying she had to work early the next morning and "we can reschedule."

Still feeling high interest on the texts, asked her out a couple more times. On the second, she said "she would, but..." had a funeral to attend but didn't propose an alternative.

I said "I understand," and she responded with a "" but I haven't hit her back up for about two days now, which is the longest we've been silent. What's my next move guys? She hasn't initiated many texts in the past but has been ALWAYS quick to respond; even the last few.

Should I hit her up for a third or is she just stringing me along? Did I break this plate or did I just misplace it temporarily? :woo:

 

[Lord Hypnos]

Guys, hate to Frankenstein this post, but I'm trying to figure out the next move and need some expert opinions :cheer: if I can get them:

To summarize previous posts, had two AWESOME dates with this girl (who was my barista) to which we parted with a make-out sesh after date 2.

Planned something three days later which she called me to bail on last minute. Asked her out again the next day and she replied saying she had to work early the next morning and "we can reschedule."

Still feeling high interest on the texts, asked her out a couple more times. On the second, she said "she would, but..." had a funeral to attend but didn't propose an alternative.

I said "I understand," and she responded with a "" but I haven't hit her back up for about two days now, which is the longest we've been silent. What's my next move guys? She hasn't initiated many texts in the past but has been ALWAYS quick to respond; even the last few.

Should I hit her up for a third or is she just stringing me along? Did I break this plate or did I just misplace it temporarily? :woo:

lol ah the old 'i have to go to a funeral' flake.. it never fails.. :crackup: :crackup:

your princess is in another castle. she is dating/banging other dudes, that is the reason she is flaking on you. ignore her until she texts you. if she does then tell her to come over with movies and a 6 pack

 

[dashiznick]

Well, the funeral thing I know is legit because we talked about it before we started dating.

 

[Lord Hypnos]

Well, the funeral thing I know is legit because we talked about it before we started dating.

it's up to you, you can either believe every word she tells you, so you'll keep asking her out, and she'll keep giving you 100 different legit reasons why she can't make it (work early, tired, funerals, weddings, birthdays, etc..), or you could observe her ACTIONS instead of her WORDS, and realize you're NOT her top priority right now :crackup:

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Dude that sounds like 3 times you asked her and and have been shut down! Take the hint and stop asking this chick out! Once you get a woman interested and sounds like you kind of did....but it also sounds like you kind of blew it?
Completely back off, woman get chased at the f-ing time......let her chase YOU now! SMH