make_shark2000
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- May 10, 2015
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Hi all,
Thought i'd just post this for discussion and evaluation purposes.
So this was by all standards a total bomb, largely through inexperience and uncertainty. So i met this girl at a club, and we got close. We started messaging in a friendly way. I asked her out (or to hangout) and she seemed happy to come. Definitely some interest there. Problem was, since we met at a club, i knew little to nothing about her. So throughout there was this uncertainty, at least for me, whether it's a date or just a hang out. But i also know that given the circumstances, i'm kidding myself to say it wasn't a date. We had dinner. Conversation was so so....i'd score a 5/10....nothing bad, nothing great....Next thing, we split the bill, not because i couldn't afford it -- it was relatively cheap -- but again there was just no dating subtext. Went to a bar afterwards and again, conversation was good, but little to no romance. I was too hesitant to make a move though i did give signals -- looking into her eyes, closeness etc. However, later on she made moves of clear rejection, including shunning and talking to other guys in the club, and the night ended on flat but possibly not negative.
So i'm thinking, is it because i made no move, was hesitant to act, didn't even pay for the bill, that caused any interest and attraction to be lost. The interest was most certainly there and possibly high after the first night (she actually contacted me first for the hangout!). Or were the signals all wrong to begin with. Now i know this was a bomb, and i don't plan to save it tbh. But some suggestions and advice would be good.
Thanks,
Thought i'd just post this for discussion and evaluation purposes.
So this was by all standards a total bomb, largely through inexperience and uncertainty. So i met this girl at a club, and we got close. We started messaging in a friendly way. I asked her out (or to hangout) and she seemed happy to come. Definitely some interest there. Problem was, since we met at a club, i knew little to nothing about her. So throughout there was this uncertainty, at least for me, whether it's a date or just a hang out. But i also know that given the circumstances, i'm kidding myself to say it wasn't a date. We had dinner. Conversation was so so....i'd score a 5/10....nothing bad, nothing great....Next thing, we split the bill, not because i couldn't afford it -- it was relatively cheap -- but again there was just no dating subtext. Went to a bar afterwards and again, conversation was good, but little to no romance. I was too hesitant to make a move though i did give signals -- looking into her eyes, closeness etc. However, later on she made moves of clear rejection, including shunning and talking to other guys in the club, and the night ended on flat but possibly not negative.
So i'm thinking, is it because i made no move, was hesitant to act, didn't even pay for the bill, that caused any interest and attraction to be lost. The interest was most certainly there and possibly high after the first night (she actually contacted me first for the hangout!). Or were the signals all wrong to begin with. Now i know this was a bomb, and i don't plan to save it tbh. But some suggestions and advice would be good.
Thanks,