i have a major conflict at work and need your advice! i have been dating a coworker for two years now (up to now it has not been a problem in the office.) Anyways, a new girl was hired and she has been flirting non-stop with him right in my face!(yes she knows we are dating) i politely confronted her on this after several months of this, naturally she denied it) (my boyfriend doesn't really respond to it but i feel he could be a little more distant w her) anyways, i dont want to start any problems but i am beginning to really dislike working with her. i know ishould take the high road and be pleasant but thedisrespect towards me is making it more difficult to do so, any suggestions how to handle it?
big problem at work!
- Thread starter terry223
- Start date
jlujan
Don Juan
This is the reason why work relationships are a no-no.
-Zero_h0uR-
Senior Don Juan
If she isn't stopping, then he's showing her interest. Don't fool yourself.
If he showed her no interest, she would stop, and move on to someone who WOULD show her interest.
Work relationships are bad.
BTW... It's not her you should be worried about... It's him.
-- Zero
If he showed her no interest, she would stop, and move on to someone who WOULD show her interest.
Work relationships are bad.
BTW... It's not her you should be worried about... It's him.
-- Zero
Don Rageta
Don Juan
sounds like its time for a good ol' fashioned CATFIGHT
Peace and Quiet
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
Sir Jeffrey
Don Juan
What the hell do you know you piece of !@#$. There's nothing that cannot be done.Originally posted by jlujan
This is the reason why work relationships are a no-no.
jlujan
Don Juan
I used to manage a restaurant with over 120 employees, i did this for 4 yrs, so i have seen and dealt with my fair share of work relationships that went to hell and affected the professional life of those involved.Originally posted by Sir Jeffrey
What the hell do you know you piece of !@#$. There's nothing that cannot be done.
I know far more than you will ever do, to begin with, never open your mouth if you don't have the complete facts.
Don't be an asshat.Originally posted by Sir Jeffrey
What the hell do you know you piece of !@#$. There's nothing that cannot be done.
TesuqueRed
Master Don Juan
Like, no shyt.Originally posted by Sir Jeffrey
What the hell do you know you piece of !@#$. There's nothing that cannot be done.
You can do anything you want.
Anything.
Cross the street whenever you want. PROVE you got the right of way and then---crippled---you can bytch about how you were right.
You're crippled.
But WTF, you were right!
These people exist---usually they're very angry, blame the world for why they're failures and can prove they were right. And they were right. But so what?
I'd rather deal with reality. Liljuan is right, it's better ON AVERAGE and for a number of good reasons not to engage in relationships at work.
Sometimes they work. And you have a right to pursue these if you want. It's just not a good idea.
So what's your issue with Liljuan??? Some flame war being carried on from a prior thread? You a troll?
My 2 cents: "you can do anything you want" is useful as advice for someone who is failing to recognize they have an expanded range of options than what they're allowing themselves (that's not the issue here...) Otherwise this type of advice states the dumb-@ss obvious and is useless and off-point. It usually shows the person saying it has unresolved issues from high-school---authority issues for the immature still trying to define themselves or something...
So what is this post really? A carry-over flame, a troll, or something else? Maybe it's a joke and I'm missing it....???
Shiftkey
Master Don Juan
As long as it's just light flirting, you shouldn't be too bothered. But you are, so talk to your BF about it. Communication is key in these situations. Explain to your BF that you don't like it when she flirts with him and that you'd appriciate him to make an effort to make her stop. Ask him how he would like it if some guy constantly flirted with you. Make sure that you make it clear to your BF that you trust him, but you can't help that it bothers you when she flirts with him.
There's not much else you can do short of dumping him. If you show too much insecurity you'll risk pushing him away.
There's not much else you can do short of dumping him. If you show too much insecurity you'll risk pushing him away.
Peace and Quiet
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
TesuqueRed
Master Don Juan
Oooo, forgot to address Terry's issue.
Wondering if this is what is happening, Terry...
Years ago I dated someone at work (before I knew better and before it got ugly...) and twice while we were openly dating a girl came up and started openly hitting on me in front of the GF. By hitting on me I refer to stroking the arm (sexual kino), suggestive comments, requests for me to stop by her house and visit, etc etc.
Simply blatant shyt.
You know how we use "social proof" to get another woman's interest because if one woman finds a guy acceptable, other womens' opinion about the guy goes up?
Sometimes this gets jacked up into a pathological condition where a woman is ONLY interested in guys who are attached and make blatant plays for such guys in front of others. It is a proof of their desirability that can only be satisfied by taking someone who is already taken since getting an unattached guy proves nothing.
The key is that this is (speaking as an admittedly non-professional) that this is a compulsion or pathological thing they do.
Why else would someone do this with you standing 2 feet away? Who knows why she picked him and not the 5 other married guys in the office? Maybe your presense has something to do with it.
Not much you can do about it. You feel your guy could do more, but speaking from experience, he's being put in a very uncomfortable position. He doesnt' invite this attention--he normally would enjoy it, of course, but she's doing it so publicly and putting him in such a position that it isn't enjoyable.
Wondering if this is what is happening, Terry...
Years ago I dated someone at work (before I knew better and before it got ugly...) and twice while we were openly dating a girl came up and started openly hitting on me in front of the GF. By hitting on me I refer to stroking the arm (sexual kino), suggestive comments, requests for me to stop by her house and visit, etc etc.
Simply blatant shyt.
You know how we use "social proof" to get another woman's interest because if one woman finds a guy acceptable, other womens' opinion about the guy goes up?
Sometimes this gets jacked up into a pathological condition where a woman is ONLY interested in guys who are attached and make blatant plays for such guys in front of others. It is a proof of their desirability that can only be satisfied by taking someone who is already taken since getting an unattached guy proves nothing.
The key is that this is (speaking as an admittedly non-professional) that this is a compulsion or pathological thing they do.
Why else would someone do this with you standing 2 feet away? Who knows why she picked him and not the 5 other married guys in the office? Maybe your presense has something to do with it.
Not much you can do about it. You feel your guy could do more, but speaking from experience, he's being put in a very uncomfortable position. He doesnt' invite this attention--he normally would enjoy it, of course, but she's doing it so publicly and putting him in such a position that it isn't enjoyable.