Big Curveball - HelpNeeded !

[ryanbo29]

To sum up: I met this girl online, we met.. after the first date she was very complementary thru phone text messages she sent me the next day. She also randomly messaged me through the week..

We went out a week later, and one thing led to another. We slept together. After she left, later in the day she text messaged me what a good time she had. After that, the messages ceased for a day or two.. I called her to ask her out. No answer. She msged me the next day saying she was out with a neighbor. I asked her out, we went out last Friday. The whole week she mentioned she was having cramps, all that other girly stuff, but we had a great time. She stayed over, but no intercourse, I'm guessing because of cramps, and she sorta stayed to herself a bit. After she left on Sat morning I haven't heard from her, txt, or otherwise. At midnight on Monday she logged on IM but didn't message me. After 10 mins I messaged her and we had a casual conversation before she turned in for bed.

I dunno.. Part of me thinks I'm overreacting. Personally. I never txt message anyone, but I guess through these 3 weeks I've gotten used to her keeping in touch afterwards. I've noticed it's less and less however. Do you think this is because she's less interested or she just doesn't want to seem too into me or something? We've now gone out once a week for three weeks.

Also, my usual pattern has been calling her Tuesday and asking out for Friday. Given that I talked to her online an hour ago, when do you guys think I should call to ask her out again?


Any opinions?

Darren

P.S. Thank you for your time in reading and responding.

 

[tiburonII]

OK Listen carefully

Dear Darren:

This is excactly whats happening but you dont wnat to see it. Your ego is blocking your vision.

SHE HAS ANOTHER MAN!

ITS THAT SIMPLE.


Dont ask me why is this the case , probably she had him before she met you anyways....but thats the case. Stick long enough and you will see....Don't call her anymnore. Give her no attention show very little respect.

 

[xblitz44x]

I don't really agree that she has someone else. She might, she might not. Either way, who cares at this point?

You're overreacting. She hasn't done anything that would tell you for sure that she's 'losing interest' or whatever. Just relax and do your thing. If you want to ask her out, ask her out again. If you want to call her, call her. If she IS losing interest in you, it doesn't have anything to do with how frequent you're calling her. If anything, your waiting to call will make her retaliate with games of her own.

Don't panic.

 

[ryanbo29]

Thanks for the replies.. The only things that indicate lost interest in my mind are that she text messages much less. Also, yesterday night she jumped online when I was on and didn't message me.. After 10 mins I msged her and we ended up talking for about 20 mins..

Then this morning same thing happened.. she didn't message me, then logged off about 10 minutes later, presumably to go to work...

I usually call or txt her on Tuesdays to ask her out.. Given we saw each other Fri night/Sat morn, and that we chatted briefly late Mon night, when do you think I should ask her out/initiate contact.

Thanks a lot man

Darren

 

[xblitz44x]

Hey Darren,

I understand what you mean about how she might not IM you right away but really, so what? Think about it....if a friend of yours (guy or girl) hung out with you the night before, and you signed online and they didn't IM you right away, would you get all bent out of shape about it? Of course not. You'd just assume he/she is busy doing whatever they do. You wouldn't sit there and think "My god! Maybe they don't want to be friends with me anymore! Maybe they lost interest in our friendship!"

Sit back and have a good time with her. You're doing great so far.

 

[ryanbo29]

Great insight, thanks.

When do you think I should contact her again for a date, given that we chatted briefly at Midnight on Monday? (Past 3 dates I've txted her on Tuesday to go out on Friday)

 

[ryanbo29]

NEED QUICK RESPONSE

Update..

I text messaged her today and said lets go out friday night..

She responded "Maybe. I'm doing dinner with my step mother.. maybe later that night."

Please help, how do I respond.. I feel like Im being strung out.

 

[xblitz44x]

I would probably just say:

"Alright then. Make sure you save me the leftovers. : ) Text me when you know for sure."

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Re: NEED QUICK RESPONSE

Originally posted by ryanbo29
She responded "Maybe. I'm doing dinner with my step mother.. maybe later that night."

Please help, how do I respond.. I feel like Im being strung out.

I dunno, she's either testing your interest or there is someone else. Personally, I wouldn't like this scenario if it was happening to me.

I don't like the fact that she's not going out of her way for you. Maybe you need to back off and test her interest.

 

[NewMan]

Your talking to het to much.

Cut the Txt message sh#t - especially asking her out. If your going to do it, call her up.

I would recomend you NOT call her again until next week.

Leave things as they are. If she's interested she will call on Friday.

Don't go all crazy and constantly talk to her day in day out. That is desperate and needy.

Do your thing this week and next weekend.

Relax, don't think about her or stress on what is happening.

Then next week, call her and ask her out.

By the way, stop acting on a pre decided schedule. Don't always call her the same day to go out on the same night. You want to be creative - you don't want to do the same thing every week - it'll get boring and repetative - and she will see you as such.

Change thing up - ask her out on a different night to do something Saturday say.

You get the picture.

 

[ryanbo29]

Thanks guys.

I didn't respond to the txt..message.

Remember, I haven't been all talky to her.. She last left my place Saturday morning.. The next time I talked to her was Monday midnight (essentially Tues morning) for like 15 mins on Instant messenger.

Since I usually ask her out on Tuesday, I msged her Tues afternoon and asked her out.

After her reply I have not replied..

I've been pretty scarce on the phone calls... so I'll go back into my hole and see what happens

 

[xblitz44x]

Ok man, do what you want. I'm just saying, by playing this challenge distant guy, what are you trying to hide from her? Eventually who you really are is going to come through. You might as well be proud of it and just be who you are. Not saying call her every second either but call when you want; do what you want.

If she rejects you, wouldn't it be better to know that she rejected *you*, rather than fvcking it up by playing some game and never knowing if she really liked you all along?

 

[Lost In Translation]

just my 2 cents

you sound like you want a relationship with her

she is saying she is happy with the current arrangement

BOOTY CALL

she is testing you to see if you will make a good f*** buddy

no strings attached just a good time

you messing up your chances for anything with her and you might scare her away altogether with your needy/always available behavior

my advice get some more hoes and kill oneitis before it kills you

what you chatting about so much ? YOU MUST REMAIN A MYSTERY

you always calling her ? YOU MUST BE A CHALLENGE

p.s in my opinion she is up to something ( probably other guys )


Lost In Translation

**AUSTRALIAN STREET PIMP**

 

[ryanbo29]

Naw. I'm not always calling her. Like I said.. didnt have any contact since Saturday morning until Monday at midnight.. is that always there?

A booty call is fine with me. I don't care about a relationship. I kinda like her, but I know we'll never work out long term.

But what I am trying to decide is how to respond to that msg, or if at all...

Do I ignore it or say something else? Many of you seem to think I shouldn't say anything back.. Let her call me again