Best Way to Respond to Insults?

[ethnomethodologist]

Originally posted by SamMalone
My friends are the ones doing the insulting. The group of guys I hang around with all insult each other like crazy. I can deal with that, but it got old. Real old. It seems like everyone just insults each other to look better in the eyes of the other guys. I'm really the only one that doesn't answer and insult with an insult, which in turn always starts a huge argument.

blah blah blah, many hands make for light work. They aren't even working are they? Or are they? Your the boring one in the group, did you realize that?

Stop ***** footing around your friends, they only feel sorry for you. Thats why they joke around with the insults, thats what starts the arguments... I think I'm the only one of my friends who gets excited about arguments. I can go for hours, I'm like a ****ing woman when I have something to argue about. I am wrong mopst of the time,than aI catch myself and find something even better that will help me out, and I try to share it before they can cut me off.

You say your the only one who doesn't conform in the group? It bothers you that much doesn't it? You never laugh? I feel bad for you, and I can't help out a loser who won't help himself. I sure can try and talk some sense into you though.

If you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen, Too many cooks spoil the broth, Life is not a series of actions, it is a series of emotions. It is your emotions that lead your thoughts, the core of your brain, the only part that remains awake whilst you sleep. Your brain creates pockets of energy, and your brain farts a lot which creates your dreams. Follow your dreams, they are a gift, I'm sure you listen to other peoples dreams, and half the time they are stupid, but to them when they really think about it, its amost exactly what they were thinking about. My dreams are always run like a movie, have been since I had nightmares when I was a child.

What I tried to say was, if you don't like your friends doing the ****, man up and tell them so. They are not really insulting you, and you know that. You asked this question,there awas a reason for it, it was stupid at first, and now we know you have no good friends. I would have killed for your friends growing up, so I think your just being a spoiled brat. Time for your noogie, dump your friends, make new ones, boring ones who never joke around, or do childish things without ever telling eachother you are wrong. Go find some yes men, than twenty, maybe thirty years down the line, as you begin to have your family, and you all become wise with age, you stop. You stop working so hard, you go back to your friends, and you tell eachother your stories about how you have changed. While your friends are the comedians congratulating eachother and making eachother laugh at their stupid mistakes, you will be the grumpy gus who thinks everything is still wrong and telling people with a straight face that they are stupid. You will be the insulting one, beliving that nothing is right, and that people should listen to your boring rants bout stuff that they don't care about anymore.

 

[Adone]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
sorry man, but you're the one who sounds like a nerd.

Don't worry man, I didn't mean to say you are a nerd. I wasn't saying it doesn't work for you, either. We have to understand that we live in two different nations and what works here might not work in Canada and viceversa. Where I live, if you put up a serious look when you get insulted, people usually think that you've been offended by it; nobody would think you don't care.

Originally posted by ethnomethodologist
Adone, your the only one who had the balls to take an insult for its face value, you said it perfectly in your first response, but you missed out on the fact that it's almost always in a social forum that the insult is placed... If your actually in the process of doing something valuable with your time by making your connection stronger with your friends, you choose what is useful, and discard the useless, make it your own. So an improper insult youdon't even have to worry about... IE what badass canadian said, you played that the same way he did, kudos. If it's juvenile, call them on it, make them look juvenile and get a good laugh out of it, challenge them to a quick pissing match, than tell them it's getting boring to shut them up, fun for both sides. If it is a heavy insult, it usually means something, you take it as you get it, if its a swear, you have a great comeback, but what if there is no swear, or they heavily insult you again until you answer your own question?

Consider that I was just referring to friendly insults, like when you're playing around with your buddies. If I'm walking down the street and I overhear somebody I dont know who's making fun of me, my reaction would be completely different. When I used to wear my hair long, I remember overhearing a bunch of guys calling me names. I immediately jumped over a wall they were behind, grabbed one by the neck and said "say it again, bìtch".
But, again, those were people I had never talked to in my whole life, so I didn't allow them to insult me.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Originally posted by Adone
Don't worry man, I didn't mean to say you are a nerd. I wasn't saying it doesn't work for you, either. We have to understand that we live in two different nations and what works here might not work in Canada and viceversa. Where I live, if you put up a serious look when you get insulted, people usually think that you've been offended by it; nobody would think you don't care.




Consider that I was just referring to friendly insults, like when you're playing around with your buddies. If I'm walking down the street and I overhear somebody I dont know who's making fun of me, my reaction would be completely different. When I used to wear my hair long, I remember overhearing a bunch of guys calling me names. I immediately jumped over a wall they were behind, grabbed one by the neck and said "say it again, bìtch".
But, again, those were people I had never talked to in my whole life, so I didn't allow them to insult me.

Yeah i hear what you're saying...

It's not so much a serious look as it is a "I don't give a fvck what you say" kinda thing. I've always been a guy who commands respect from my circle of friends and no one ever insults me because of it. i can take ball busting and just fire them right back with my own stuff but when it comes down to crossing a line and getting downright disrespectful, i'd much rather keep the upperhand by not being fazed by it. I WOULD probably mention something about it to the person, in private, later.

Tell them to cut the B.S. cuz it isn't necessary.

But, that's just how I am. I'm very straight up with people.

 

[Adone]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
Yeah i hear what you're saying...

It's not so much a serious look as it is a "I don't give a fvck what you say" kinda thing. I've always been a guy who commands respect from my circle of friends and no one ever insults me because of it. i can take ball busting and just fire them right back with my own stuff but when it comes down to crossing a line and getting downright disrespectful, i'd much rather keep the upperhand by not being fazed by it. I WOULD probably mention something about it to the person, in private, later.

Tell them to cut the B.S. cuz it isn't necessary.

But, that's just how I am. I'm very straight up with people.

You are right, everyone's different. I'm really loud, extrovert and outgoing, so people would sense I'm just trying too hard, if I suddenly put on a serious look just because they are playing around with me.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Alright you two, Adone and Bad ass, get a ****ing room

Why the **** would somebody insult you in the first place? Think they are possibly joking with their friends? I see now from your guys arguments, that ****ing up on your behalf is the problem right? I'm trying to ask the right question, so I'm working it out as I type, I'm not perfect, I don't try to be, I just don't want to **** up so always bear with me, or stop listening. I'm an angry person, almost the only time I get angry is when somebody keeps things I need away from me. Sometimes they keep it away for the right reason, I see people all the time who are in the dumps, I tease them to find out what they don't have. They get happier, other people see it and don't understand what I'm doing, right until the punchline. I tease them, until they get so angry they don't care about being nice to me anymore, and they insult me, with their problem. I take that problem that they see, and I reverse the words, I put their shoes on, and pretend I'm talking to myself. Which of you two said it? You said at least I tried or something "well.... at least I had the balls to try it."

So guys, look back at yourselves, don't worry, I'm practicing what I preach, I do the field work, I'm not afraid. So you guys stop thinking your so big, there is a difference between a true insult, and an ugly opinion. If somebody thinks they are really insulting you, than it's only around something that you CANNOT control. Like me calling your mom a dead **** cause she died of cancer and your standing over her open casket with your **** in her mouth. Even than, You can still laugh about it. I find it insulting when people take things from me, and block my way. So say your walking down the road, if some random stranger popped out of nowhere and started insulting you what would you do? Jump over a wall and grab his neck tell him to do it again? What if your busy and you've got to run, you've got to be somewhere in two minutes, so you can't stop for anything, your not living with a purpose if you suddenly have to stop and kick their ass. I'm being the mediator, kill me if you don't like what I'm hearing, or ignore me, I need to learn a few lessons in ignoring people and still being nice and having fun. Well, imagine now what it would be like if every moment of every day people insulted eachother, your kind of insults, "your hair is ugly" "you smell like ****" "Your sister is hot" "I bet you **** your dog" "You will never succeed" "you've got pimples pizza face" "what a fat, ugly slob" "diptard, get to work" "stop being such a lazy ass" "I bet your mom, dropped you on your head" "I've been insulted all my life... You sget insulted enough, you get angry like me, or what seems like angry, This is all pent up stuff, and I'm blowing up the nicest way I can. I can give you some harsh insults, and they mean nothing in the end... 50 years from now, will you still remember me insulting you? Or will you thank me for telling you the truth?

Have you ever heard the saying that only your friends can honestly tell you about yourself? Well these people are being compassionate, whether they know it or not, fine linging, silver linging, theres specks of hope in everybody, that little flame that you have to see. You are a sick mother****er if you don't let other people succeed. Help them out if its somebody else causing them a problem. Stand up for the underdog, why? Because it's damned boring if there's only one side winning, there's no advancement if you own the monopoly, there's no fun if you win the game every time.

I don't even know you guys. Ignore me and I'll be insulted.