Best sex injury...

[Vis a Vis]

I haven't had too many of these but my friend just had a classic encounter. Apparently he was doing doing his gf from behind and was near the edge of the bed when he slipped off and hurt his knee. At the time he didn't think much of it and they laughed it off and finished up (probably 3 min. later! - sorry Randy LOL). The next day he woke up and his knee was swollen big time. Turns out he tore his PCL and ACL!!! It sucks for him but I gotta admit it's way funny.

Anyone else know a great sex injury story?

 

[lordson]

nothing that great

my gf was riding me, and we were on the floor

and the day after i had a few bruises from where she was bumping in to me

definately need a bed to absorb the shocks

and that story is exxagerated, you can't tear the ACL as well as the PCL from falling off the bed, ACL only, and maybe the ML's

 

[KontrollerX]

LMFAO the torn ACL injury usually only happens to pro wrestlers or football players.

 

[LostAndConfused]

or girls, haha.

 

[AFC Savior]

lets watch the Randy Moss trial, I bet there was a funny sex injury there lol

 

[joekerr31]

one time when i was young i was doing a prank call and called a doctors office and told them i had a carrot lodged in my *ss and that it was lodged up there sideways so it wouldn't come out.

the nurse said 'you need to go to the emergency room, they can take it out no problem.'

i said 'im too embarassed. they will ask me how a carrot got lodged in my butt sideways.'

she laughed and said 'no they won't. trust me, i've been a nurse for a long time and these kinds of things are more common than you'd think.'

so while i dont have any actual stories, im pretty sure there are LOTS of extremely wierd and crazy sex injuries going on out there on a regular basis.

 

[KontrollerX]

LMFAO @ joekerr!!! :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

 

[Levex]

I knew this one guy, he got a hernia from fvcking a fat chick...no joke, had to get the surgery and everything.

I didnt ask for details on exactly how it happened, the mental image i already have is bad enough.

 

[azanon]

Ever had a chick "come down on it" wrong when she was woman on top? (meaning, getting so much "air" that she actually made it come out then slammed her 120-140lbs down on it slightly "off-center") Man, I had one almost break mine doing that.

You can actually "break" it, and it is usually a very serious injury that often warrants a trip to the ER and probably surgery.

 

[comic_relief]

Ever had a chick "come down on it" wrong when she was woman on top? (meaning, getting so much "air" that she actually made it come out then slammed her 120-140lbs down on it slightly "off-center") Man, I had one almost break mine doing that.

You can actually "break" it, and it is usually a very serious injury that often warrants a trip to the ER and probably surgery.

I have had it happen, but it only hurt for a bit and no it wasn't "broke." I just didn't finish that night.

Anyways, my personal story was because my ex-girlfriend was psychotic. She decided to give me a BJ. So she is giving me one and she BITES down on me. I let out a yelp, she looks up, and I throw her off of me to the ground. I am holding my **** and screaming "MEDIC!!!" I am bleeding at this point in the story and have to put a band-aid on my ****. Holy sh!t did it hurt. I was crying.

My ex-girlfriend and myself dated another four months and then we broke up. We rarely talk anymore.

comic_relief

 

[Desdinova]

Mine isn't an injury per se. It's actually a discovery that I cannot use spermicide.

We had the spermicidal foam stuff, so she put it inside of her. I don't know if you guys have ever used this stuff, but it's kinda neat. Comes in an aerasol can, you spray it into a big syringe, and then it's injected into her box.

Anyway, I'm pumpin' away, and my damn d1ck starts to burn. I mean REALLY fvcking burn. I had to stop, and eventually ended up on the floor rolling in agony because that spermicide 5hit had likely got inside my d1ck. Some of you know what it's like pissing razorblades - well make it constant and that's pretty much what it feels like.

It was even worse when I tried to take a piss. I swear to god, I was in tears.

I get the same problem when I use rubbers with spermicide, although not as intense as that one time.

 

[WesCottII]

Not really an injury.

I was doing a girl, she was riding me, all was fun. After, she got up and turned on the lights, and there was blood everywhere, her, my cawk, the sheets, and I am nonplussed. Scared and nonplussed.

Turned out she'd "come on" to her period, and bled everywhere.

 

[Desdinova]

there was blood everywhere, her, my cawk, the sheets, and I am nonplussed. Scared and nonplussed.

I had that happen too. The first time I tore a woman while banging her, there was blood all over the goddam place. We were both kinda freaked out. But after you learn what happened and it happens with another woman, it's kinda funny. "Hey, blood! Haven't had sex in a while, huh? )

 

[comic_relief]

actually this is a very sad story and I still want to kick the sh!t out of the guy that raped my friend, but...

My friend was date raped and she pressed charges.

She got date raped the night before and she had intense pains the next day. She went to the hospitol to get it taken care of and have a rape kit done. While the guy was humping, he poked through her vaginal wall and went into her colon. She had to go through surgery to get sewed back up. She could barely walk for over a week and is now doing alright, but she is mentally fvcked up. Luckily she has a lot of good and supportive friends.

comic_relief

 

[Obsidian]

i heard that if your d1ck gets broken, it will heal on its own -- altho it may be abnormally-shaped afterward

 

[navyseal2101]

the thought of breaking it makes me cringe

 

[WesCottII]

I had that happen too. The first time I tore a woman while banging her, there was blood all over the goddam place. We were both kinda freaked out. But after you learn what happened and it happens with another woman, it's kinda funny. "Hey, blood! Haven't had sex in a while, huh? )

That, and I once banged a kickboxer (woman... ), that whilst flexible, and sexy as hell, liked to hit/bite/scratch, and I had to erm, "terminate my physicallity" with her, because she became like that woman from Goldeneye I believe it is.

 

[Sir Juanalot]

Snapped banjo string, blood everywhere, thought it was her period, but she was adamant that it wasnt that, then i noticed the pain

 

[steve38]

Nothing too serious. Once while rolling around in bed, we rolled off and I landed on her ankle and sprained it pretty good. Pulled ab muscles (me) from putting a little too much effort into it. And of course the standard rug burns on my knees from doing it on the carpet. Oh yeah, once a hooker in Chihuahua rode me so hard, my pubic bone was sore for a week. She was a sweetie!

 

[thehexman]

A friend of mine did his gf in such a f+cked up position that he got a back
spasm. As he was so hurt that he couldn't move anymore, his gf called emergency and they lifted him off the floor naked and with a hard-on (wonder how he kept that up?) and got him to a chiro.
This btw was not covered by insurance.