Best decision i ever made

[tryst type]

I would never sit back and wait for a girl to work up the nerve to call me.

I couldn't imagine how many opportunities that would cost me. I'd rather make the first move, and lead the action. If some shy little honey is too scared to call me, then what happens? I lose an interested prospect because I gave her my number instead of taking hers.

I do agree with this, but right now i'm just at a point where i could honestly care less 95% of the time. So whether she contacts me or not, whatever. If i do happen to find myself particularly interested in a girl to the point where i'd 100% want it to go somewhere, i'll get her number as well.

 

[Kenny Powers]

Like I said earlier I think this method is more effective than one might think at first glance. Unless she is really shy, if she doesn't text you after you give her your number it means you probably wouldn't have been able to get anywhere if you had her #. I get tons of #s and of those who respond to my texts, the vast majority eventually fizzle out after I get tired of initiating the conversation every time or begin to notice consistent low interest in texts. Letting her initiate could save a lot of time and set you apart. It puts her in the mind-set of taking a risk and hoping you respond, automatically increasing your value.

Also, one thing I'm thinking of doing that I would appreciate some feedback on is saying: "I'm too busy to waste my time getting to know someone who doesn't want to get to know me, so only text me if you do." or something to that effect. Essentially showing interest but also indicating semi-HV.

Again don't risk this on high IL girls! Best for ones who u don't get a chance to talk to for very long or who have medium to low IL. We'll see how it goes this weekend

 

[bilboteabaggins]

I would never sit back and wait for a girl to work up the nerve to call me.

I couldn't imagine how many opportunities that would cost me. I'd rather make the first move, and lead the action. If some shy little honey is too scared to call me, then what happens? I lose an interested prospect because I gave her my number instead of taking hers.

the best girls will never call or ask you out, up to the man :rockon:

mostly sluts and trash approach men

 

[dice]

I disagree with the OP. Girls are emotional remember. They do not think logically. Most girls will sit back and wait to see who triggers their emotions the best. They don't sit at home going Oh man i should call that guy

 

[Blues]

Man = Action

Woman = Reaction.

Waiting for a girl you just met to give you a call, you'll probably be waiting for a long long time.

Whats so hard for a guy to just pick up the phone and say "lets hang out blah blah"

This method seems more of indirectly avoiding rejection than gauging her interest level.

 

[d!ckmojo]

Horses for courses~ if this strat works for the OP, props^^

But he must be one killer handsome dude, with bag-loads of charisma and magnetic charm bursting out of his pockets~ more power to him.

For me though, this strat would be a cop out, BECAUSE it's exactly what I would want to do. I'm a passive kind of guy (so was my father), for me its all too easy just to sit back and let the world happen around me. If I can defer the anxiety of putting myself on the line and stumping up for a possible rejection, I normally will.

So for me, the challenge is to be more assertive, to be a leader. I need to develop the skills to be able to lead the interaction from start to finish if I am going to be confident that I can reliably achieve my goal of dating another new HB8+ each week.

But that is just my specific situation and I realise that everyone's circumstances are different at any particular time, so congrats to the OP.

 

[bugsquish]

I don't think this has any advantages over taking the number from her. If you've created so much attraction that she's prepared to call you first, then taking her number would be equally effective. In fact I would say more so, because you don't need the worry if she's the kind of girl who is ballsy enough to make the first move. Don't underestimate the social conditioning that says girls are supposed to be the ones who are courted. Anyway personally, I like to be in control!

 

[squirrels]

Don't "ask" to hang out. "Offer".

In other words, you're giving her the enjoyment of your company and offering her the opportunity to impress you. You're not asking HER for HER time.

Most guys just cannot quite get down the "her loss" mentality...they say when a girl refuses an invitation that it's "her loss", but deep down they're wishing she had said "yes" and wondering how to turn it around.

The "her loss" mentality is where you HONESTLY feel like you'd rather NOT hang out with her...you'd be just as happy doing something with friends or by yourself...but you're willing to do something different for a change by inviting a pretty girl to hang out with you.

You really have to have "nothing to lose". Don't invest your ego and your self-image in whether or not a girl reciprocates your affections and you won't get hurt if she doesn't. Because no matter how "Juan" you are, not every girl is gonna be into you.

Sun Tzu said that the wise general only seeks to engage in combat when the battle is already won...he puts himself in a position where he cannot be conquered.

 

[Solomon]

If this works for you, I totally applaud it. But to me, it seems like you're not leaving with the power. You're giving HER the power.

All that nervousness and insecurity you wrote about....well, girls feel that too. Except they don't always have the guts to plow through it and make the first move. So while you'll get the girls who are 100% interested, you're missing out on the ones who might be too shy/hesitant to make that first call.

If the chick is so interested in you that she's willing to make the first move, then it wouldn't have mattered if you got her number instead and made the first move yourself. She was a definite buyer. But MOST girls aren't definite buyers. And by handing your number to them, and putting the ball in their court, you're missing out on them. It's hard for US to think of the right thing to say in that first call...girls, even if they like you, won't have the courage to work through that.

I totally agree with this, I live in an area were a lot of women consider themselves traditional and women expect a man to lead, to some women this move may make you look timid

I've tried it and honestly it doesn't work for me if it works for you then props

Don't "ask" to hang out. "Offer".

In other words, you're giving her the enjoyment of your company and offering her the opportunity to impress you. You're not asking HER for HER time.

Most guys just cannot quite get down the "her loss" mentality...they say when a girl refuses an invitation that it's "her loss", but deep down they're wishing she had said "yes" and wondering how to turn it around.

The "her loss" mentality is where you HONESTLY feel like you'd rather NOT hang out with her...you'd be just as happy doing something with friends or by yourself...but you're willing to do something different for a change by inviting a pretty girl to hang out with you.

You really have to have "nothing to lose". Don't invest your ego and your self-image in whether or not a girl reciprocates your affections and you won't get hurt if she doesn't. Because no matter how "Juan" you are, not every girl is gonna be into you.

Sun Tzu said that the wise general only seeks to engage in combat when the battle is already won...he puts himself in a position where he cannot be conquered.

This is a great post, but how does one apply this especially a narcissist such as myself who does everything based of his ego?

lol

 

[PDubb75]

I'm somewhat on the fence on what I think about this idea. In one way, it is great if it works, as you will have no doubt in your mind of her IL. But I completely agree with the responses saying that women are more timid, and you are probably missing out on some interested shy women.

What I would be interested to see, is if the OP would try the method of getting her number now. My guess is, ever since offering your number, your confidence has raised. If you use that same confidence and mindset you are using when you offer your number, I would love to compare your results for when you get her number.

There are obviously many variables that could be affecting the results, but it would be interesting to see.

OP, wanna be a lab rat??

 

[Xanthus]

Just throwing in my 2 cents here.

I'd prefer going for the number anyway. Hey, maybe I'll get a fake one that turns out to be a local pizza shop. I like pizza. Mmmmm.

All kidding aside.. giving your number may make it easier on weeding out those with lower IL, but you'll lose out on something that could potentially develop if you don't have her's.

My view is that it's better to still go for the number, BUT not be so eager or have that itch to get in touch with her too fast. It's not easy to release that excitement and interest you have in a girl you just met. Having an active life and/or occupying your mind with other things you enjoy will help from thinking too much in that respect.

A better way is to keep doing what is important to you at the moment. After awhile, if you think she'd enjoy spending some time with you, then go casually ring her up. Hell, even to just grab a cup of coffee and bagel may be a worthwhile offer. If anything, it'll be something different in her eyes.

Manage your life first and then welcome women into it. Don't let them be the main focus. Chasing skirts with no results will no doubt waste your effort, not to mention your money. I'd rather have that moola for pizza. Mmmmm.

Xanthus

 

[JerryFl08]

It's been a lonnnnnnng time since I've been on this forum, but i read this and I have to admit it seems interesting to try. Gonna give it a go, and see how it works out

 

[Cry For Love]

You can keep complainin here like a little prick or go out there annd do something. despite all your bull**** theres still 1:1 ration. 1 girl per 1 guy. Which means that it is IMPOSSIBLE for girls to have more tools(or plates, **** buddies or whatever on average) than guys. Girls on average have 5 tools? No problem, that means guys must also have 5 tools.

Your argument is disgusting sexist bull****, OP, and i hope you get out of your rut and make something of your life

 

[runner83]

If it works for the OP, then all well and good.

But it also means you may be (essentially) throwing away the numbers of girls who may have been into you, if you'd gotten their numbers.

A better way to filter for interest (in my opinion) is to get their number, then suggest to meet up.

If she doesn't (or flakes) twice, then bam, she's gone!