Being Romantic

[The Duke]

Ok ok so I've had a few women in my past tell me I'm not very romantic. And I'm guessing they are probably right. DAmn those biatches.

It makes me feel like a lesser man to be romantic. It doesn't really align with my personality either. I relate to the Clint Eastwood/John Wayne types.

So can you guys provide some examples of things you do that girls find romantic?

One example a girl told me that an ex did was he bought her concert tickets. When she came home she walked thru the door and followed a trail of flower petals that led to the bedroom with candles lit amongst the concert tickets.

That seems so cheesy to me.......is it?

When they tell me I'm not romantic, I always ask them what makes them think they are so romantic! lol I truly don't find many women romantic at all. Its more like a word they all like to throw around.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

Ok ok so I've had a few women in my past tell me I'm not very romantic. And I'm guessing they are probably right. DAmn those biatches.

It makes me feel like a lesser man to be romantic. It doesn't really align with my personality either. I relate to the Clint Eastwood/John Wayne types.

So can you guys provide some examples of things you do that girls find romantic?

One example a girl told me that an ex did was he bought her concert tickets. When she came home she walked thru the door and followed a trail of flower petals that led to the bedroom with candles lit amongst the concert tickets.

That seems so cheesy to me.......is it?

When they tell me I'm not romantic, I always ask them what makes them think they are so romantic! lol I truly don't find many women romantic at all. Its more like a word they all like to throw around.

Things I’ve done that women found romantic:

When I plan an evening out, but dont tell her where we are eating or going afterward. I just tell her when I’ll pick her up and what to wear.

Cooking dinner for both of us at my place. Wine, flowers on the table, candlelight. Some Diana Krall or Johnny Hartman music in the background.

Dinner at a restaurant that has a singer/musician. Dancing afterward.

Always open car doors and pull out her chair at a restaurant. Always position yourself on the road side when walking with her . And when someone strange looking approaches, put yourself in between her and them.

-Augustus-

 

[Billtx49]

Was with her looking at some magnetic jewelry at a fair. While getting the pitch, I pointed to my Q pendant necklace and told the saleswoman it helped me find the love of my life. It was all an interaction with the saleswoman and me, but heard by her. The later events that evening were Hot…
It’s the surprisingly small, but meaningful comments that can get the job done for you.
Situational mental dexterity with the right amount of flair that’s verbalized is all that’s needed.
Above all else, she wants to know what you’re thinking and/or feeling.…

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Tell them to make you romantic or to give ideas. If you’re more like a tough SOB type of guy, then occasionally just bringing her a random rose one day for absolutely no reason at all will have a much greater effect on her than some cheesy wishy-washy simp bringing her a whole bouquet after giving her on Valentine’s Day. It means more because it’s more out of character, meaning she interprets it as you going out of your way more than the other dude. That’s why a lot of times chicks say that they ‘see the goodness’ inside a dude who is normally an ass. It’s not that they see anything at all, but he just did something that is completely over the top for him. And then he acts as if nothing ever happened and still remains his hard self again. But she got to see what she thinks is the ‘sweet side’ of him.

 

[Murk]

Struggle with romance due to not believe the ***** is worth it. They all end up hating me but I won’t bend the knee to commonfolk.

 

[lizardking82]

A random act of even what we call "blue pill" behaviour around here hurts you NOT if you know what you're doing.

Personally, caressing them and making them feel childish and little is something very simple to me and that a lot of them consider romantic and sweet.

 

[Magotrox]

A little unexpected gift is a nice one. Low investment, good result.

I just remind you that this kind of things should be done do a girl that deserves it. She MUST be making you VERY HAPPY. It is a REWARD for her NICE BEHAVIOR. Never give it by trying to make her like you.

 

[bigneil]

When they tell me I'm not romantic, I always ask them what makes them think they are so romantic! lol

That's like saying they have no balls.

Romance is an emergent property that occurs when you don't mess up over a sustained period. You need to stop doing whatever you are doing to spoil the moment. It's 99% not physical or she wouldn't tell you it's correctable.

Your best bet to start being more romantic is to slightly do it in jest. Say it like you might be joking. "Darling, how could I ever forget you?" They should reply "Sure!" but secretly think "Is he serious?"

One huge key is the words you use. Consider what my last girl wrote to me to break a long silence: "I loved those pictures and I love the movie we watched and I still love that recipe. How are you?" Notice her choice of words? Notice the words "I still love..." and "you" in that order? Look closely at the words you use. Don't say "I never said I wouldn't". Say "I would".

Romance is about making every last detail positive, your clothing, the food, the lighting, your words and actions.

You're probably saying unromantic things in a joking way when you need to say romantic things in a joking way.

The next thing to do is be honest and passionate. "You look so incredible in this moment I want to sculpt a statue of you to capture your beauty forever". You're probably being stoic during those moments when you should be vulnerable.

It's sort of like when you originally ask her out, you are taking a chance at rejection by revealing your interest.

 

[sazc]

Go outside, gather up some pretty weeds. Put them in an empty water bottle. Draw a really paleo portrait of yourself with a couple clouds. Maybe with her.
Walk up and give them to her with a big ass grin on your face like you really mean it.

Worked for me like a charm.

And then turn all her shirts inside out in the closet. Empty her makeup bag and fill it with crayons. Crayola ones lol.
And time it for in the morning when she is getting ready for work. Hahahaha

You had me at Crayola......

 

[bigneil]

If romantic language doesn't feel right, you might plan a romantic event like cooking her dinner and setting the table with a candle. Or a hike where you hid a bottle of wine and two glasses some place, or plan a soundtrack and ride, or watch a certain movie. It's like baking a pie. You start with a bunch of ingredients and put them all together at the right temperature for the right time and something special emerges.

A romantic event should lead to an opportunity for sex to happen.

One reason my photography goes so well is I plan extremely romantic events, outfits, hair styles, etc. Control every last detail.

Don't forget: sex first, romance after. Romance is how she rationalizes Oxytocin.

Life is about those special moments here and there. If you create enough of those moments for her, you will be the guy she can't forget.

 

[The Duke]

They tell me I'm very sweet quite often. Its not that I don't use romantic words at times. I'm pretty good at that. Its mainly that I don't plan romantic activities/events. To me its all "fluff" and I'm not a "fluff" kind of guy, I've got too much going on in my life for stuff that isn't necessary. But I'll work on it. Thanks for the ideas.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Two things have stuck in my mind. If it's intimate and or exciting they may view it as romantic. Depends on the broad I guess. Since I'm a "hockeyfreak" I don't mind taking a girl ice skating, sometimes that involves actually having to teach them if they don't know how to. Holding them up or holding their hands typically induces some tingles and definitely a big smile, blushing etc. The only downside is if they have never skated in their life, then there's a risk of falling and hurting themselves. Those dates aren't fun so I typically avoid them.

Apparently motorcycle rides can be viewed as romantic by woman as well? My ex wife always said that and I've heard it from a few others, either that or it's the vibrations/thrill that gets them excited?

Oh that and dancing, not necessarily a "club", could be honky tonk or bar with a band. Fun woman love to dance an shake their ass, if they don't I'd probably find them boring.

I agree tho looking back anytime I've forced romantic behavior, at the same time it felt cringe worthy to me inside. No one really likes an a**kissing brown nose.

As far as woman being romantic.....All they have to do is buy some lingerie and maybe some eucalyptus oil for massages. Not complaining about that tho, deep tissue back rubs are pretty fantastic.

 

[bigneil]

The key element of romance is attention to detail. Look at the old movies. Look at the sets, the outfits, the hair. Every last detail was covered. Women want to be part of such a scene, one where they can lose themselves for a moment. You might pull it off by looking great but chances are you need to take her someplace also.

Start by dressing perfect on a date. Then by taking her out for an appetizer and glass of wine at a high end restaurant, but seated at the bar (way cheaper and less pretentious, but with the same atmosphere). Then by setting a perfect table and cooking a perfect meal at your house. Then by taking her away for one night.

A simple romantic date is bowling.

 

[Bob S]

This is quite an interesting topic. The reason being that it can be interpreted that an alpha characteristic is not to be romantic as in beta nice guy mentality and we all know how women are attracted to alphas and not "nice guys". That said, this is most likely only true for the first few months of a relationship when she wants to bang you senseless as everything is fresh and exciting.Without knowing specific details, I cannot vouch for certainty but I think the woman that said this only mentioned this after things became routine with you both. I think she was looking for you to be spontaneous and keep things exciting for her. Once settled in the relationship, I actually think doing something romantic is actually something very alpha you can do and it shows you are not mundane beta boring. The catch is that you need to do this BEFORE she says you are not romantic. Once she says this, she is already informing you she is not interested in you as much anymore because you are not exciting (convert message from her).

I think in future, you need to not be the nice guy to begin with (to get her interest that you are independent and a great catch) but after things just start to become routine catch her off guard with something romantic. It doesn't have to be all petals, roses etc. Maybe when she comes and is expecting a take away you have actually cooked her a great meal - shows you dedicate your time to her. This will renew the spark she felt for you when you first met. Hope this helps. I appreciate input and feedback on my input from others to help myself better understand situations for my own interest and well being as well as my ability to help others in future. Regards, Bob.