Being in shape and game with women...

[FM 3321]

So I just got home alone and what I noticed tonight down on 6th street Austin is that the girls seem to respond to guys who have the good looks and are in shape. Keep in mind I'm not talking about guys who are only muscled up and stuff but guy who seem to have no gut or in the slim category.

Now I don't think I'm ugly but I'm pretty out of shape with a gut and a big ass to vouch for. Something keeps telling me I should improve game with girls but something deep down inside me tells me to get my ass in shape and then I'd be more successful with women.

This type of thread has probably been posted and regurgitated millions of times but maybe I need someone to tell me that I need to get in shape to attract women better. When used to workout I knew I was doing it to become more sexually attractive and did get more attention but had no idea what to do. Later I started feeling guilty for working out so I could get the ladies. Well maybe that's not so bad. What do you guys think? I'm not a fat slob but if I could get rid of my gut and my bug bubbly ass maybe I could get more females interested in me. I'm a big fan of looks matter but sometimes I feel bad for thinking that.

So could me being out of shape be a problem in me dealing with women? I seriously think so. I'm 5'11'; at 260 lbs and I know in my mind that if I got that down considerably I'd do much better with this new attitude I'm cultivating. Let me know if I'm correct with my thinking.

 

[Lifeforce]

Changing your body will help with women big time, I promise you this. What does it matter if you do it for women, as long as you do it. You'll feel awesome when you get in shape and liking what you see in the mirror.

I've gained some muscle from being a skinny twig and women would show interest left and right. My success rate went through the roof. If I were you I'd jump over to DIESELs cutting guide and start changing your life.

 

[FM 3321]

Originally posted by Lifeforce
Changing your body will help with women big time, I promise you this. What does it matter if you do it for women, as long as you do it. You'll feel awesome when you get in shape and liking what you see in the mirror.

I've gained some muscle from being a skinny twig and women would show interest left and right. My success rate went through the roof. If I were you I'd jump over to DIESELs cutting guide and start changing your life.

You know what, that's something that I needed to hear (read). I have a feeling deep down that getting your body in top shape and learning what is taught in the seduction community will do wonders for dealing with women.

 

[TheRelic]

Agreed... don't listen to anyone that gives you a spiel about how you shouldn't do it for women.

As a self proclaimed male attention wh0re, I can honestly say it's great having women appreciate your newfound body! Every other guy will agree deep down .

And yeah, as LF said, the side effects are a much greater sense of general well being.

It's fantastic doing something like lifting where you can really see the results as they happen.

Get into it!

 

[Double]

i agree with you boyzinthehood............just do it!!!!!

 

[ApocalypseCow2]

Do it. All aspects of your life will improve. You'll look better AND act more confident....a double threat. Also, you'll find that you have more energy for common activities (work, school, etc...)

 

[Jariel]

What these guys are telling you is the result of their experience, and from my experience I will tell you exactly the same thing!

Getting in shape will improve your attitude and your life completely. And all the women who want to touch, stroke and molest you isn't a bad bonus either.

 

[diablo]

Originally posted by Mr. Fingers
2. THOU SHALL BECOME WORTHY.
You can’t pretend to be the prize, you gotta be able to look in the mirror and honestly say “I LOVE this guy!”. However, this does not mean you should have a large ego. In fact your ego is one of your biggest obstacles and you would do well to rid yourself of false pride. What I am saying is..why pretend to be a great person when you can actually BE one? Work hard to excel in all areas of life. (health, wealth, relationships) Make your dreams happen and most importantly, realize that happiness is a choice!

By the same token, don’t let self-improvement be an excuse not to handle your biz. It can be very easy to make excuses like “Let me get a good car first” or “let me lose/gain 10 pounds, THEN I will try this!” Don’t fall into this trap, cuz you will just keep procrastinating, looking for reasons not to get your game on.

As you read this post, scores of beautiful women are banging ugly losers who have no future. Why? Simply because these fellas didnt let their shortness/fatness/brokeness/etc keep them from going after what they wanted!

Improve on what you can (health, fitness, style) and embrace the things you cannot change (height, race, etc) Insecurity is an ugly thing, so confront the roots of your warped self image and banish this negativity from your mind. No excuses, dude! Only you can make yourself worthy of the best things in life!

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=56631

 

[Jariel]

Thanks Diablo for bringing those great words to my attention. Gonna use part of it for my signature.

 

[coolguy676767]

Work out for whatever you goal is. Ther is no wrong motivation. Whether you work out because you want to be stronger than the guy down the street who you hate, you want to lose 10 pounds to get in better shape for the ladies, you want people to talk about how big/strong you look when you win a powerlifting contest, you want a 6-pack that people will be jealous of, you want to gain self-confidence in your body, or you just want women to look and feel you, or you simply dont want to be that fat guy everyone makes fun of.

ALL OF THESE ARE GOOD MOTIVATIONS, as long as you stick with it, and work as hard as you can, and don't give up, becuase of one set-back. Keep working at it.

Of course the best motivation, is just for simple self-improvement you feel for accomplishing a goal in your training, no matter how simple it is. But those come later, use whatever motivation you can to get in the weight room, and if you work hard and diet correctly you will become addicted to the positive results you will get whether is weighing less, lower bodyfat %, stronger than you were before, or the beautiful women who want to be with you. Most people dont get in the gym becuase they want to improve there heart, its because they want to look better to the people around them to get more attention. There is nothing wrong with this, as long as you don't stop when you acheive this goal, thats how the weight comes back, instead develop new goals or motivations, for the sake of maintaining, and improving your life-span.

So go and start working/training harder right now, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish over time with willpower, determination and consistency. So go and seize what you want.

 

[PoloBlue]

women dont like guys with a big fat belly, definitely lose the spare tire, you dont have to look like a body builder, just in good physical condition, fat makes a person look like a lazy slob.

 

[FM 3321]

This is good, great replys and thanks diablo for the words of wisdom from the bible.


I guess you have to love what you see in the mirror and honestly I don't like what I see when it comes to my body fat. I think getting rid of it will really help in all aspects of life. I should seriously just do it.

 

[MindOverMatter]

My post in another thread:

Originally posted by MindOverMatter

I'll just give you a bit of my background. 5 years ago I was 6'2, 230+ lbs, and had a very high bodyfat 25-30% (if not higher, i didn't measure). I had a decent sized gut that came from many good nights of drinking, buffets, and junk food. Here are some photos:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v632/Mind_Over_Matter/Picture89.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v632/Mind_Over_Matter/Pic1.jpg

I still had girlfriends at the time because I did not care about how I looked, the way I saw it at the time, having a gut and being happy was better then having a 6 pack and having to deprive yourself of things. Little did I know.

Anyway I was getting closer to my university graduation, and after that I planned on pursuing a career in either law enforcement (since I had a degree in psychology with a minor in criminology) or fire fighting. I visited several classes where recruits were training, and saw the shape these guys were in. That was the turning point. I told myself that if I wanted a career I loved, I would have to make changes in my lifestyle, get in shape. etc.

So I graduated, and started working on bettering myself for my career. I started educating myself on fitness, and reading as many things as my mind could absorb.

I bought Arnold's Encyclopedia of Modern Bodybuilding, which inspired me to keep researching. I started reading www.bodybuilding.com exclusively, and started learning about different methods of getting into shape, and listening to lots of opinions.

To save you time, just start reading this http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=316377
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=292244
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=101841

Post questions if you need help, people there will help you out. Also you may want to check out the Don Juan Health & Fitness forum, we help people there all the time.

Anyway back to my life story...

So I educated myself, and with all this new knowledge, I couldn't wait to start working out. At first I realized that I had way too much fat on my body, and before I could think of looking muscular, I had to lose it.

So I started doing lots of cardio and eating clean. I gave up junk food, I gave up booze, and I started taking care of my health. The first month was the hardest. I made a specific goal to live this way for *1 month*, just to prove to myself that I could do it.

Eventually that month passed without me relapsing. After completing 1 successful month of my new lifestyle, I knew that I could keep doing this, so I kept making monthly goals, and achieving them. Eventually, I lost all the fat (around 60 lbs), and was at like 170-175, was very very cut, but was skinny as hell.

Here is a photo of a skinny, 170lbs MindOverMatter:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v632/Mind_Over_Matter/Pic2.jpg

The transformation was huge, but it wasn't over yet. Now I was motivated to start lifting, and keep gaining weight. So I started lifting iron, and trying out different workout routines, seeing what gave me good results, seeing what didn't, changing things around, but ALWAYS being dedicated. I'd look forward to every workout, and I'd never miss one. Consistency was key.

Fast-forward to today (the pic is in the center flexing is at 208 or 210 lbs, I'm currently 214-215):

http://photobucket.com/albums/v632/Mind_Over_Matter/?action=view&current=mindcollage.jpg

How has my lifestyle changed since then?

My personality is the same as it was back then really. My confidence, while it was pretty high even back when I was out of shape became even higher. Once I was in amazing shape, my options increased a lot, and as a result, I became more critical of who I dated, and thus put up with less sh!t.

What has changed? I went from chasing girls / numbers / dealing with flakes to having them chase me, ask me out, and me flaking out on them. I went from getting c0ckblocked by their friends, to having their friends c0ckblock THEM.

I also do personal training, and one of my friends/female clients tells me all these stories of girls I never even met talking about me in the girls gym locker room and saying how they want to see me naked and all this other filthy sh!t.

What I'm trying to tell you here is that IT CAN BE DONE. Stop being lazy, stop wasting time on sh!t that doesn't benefit you. Sure sitting on your ass and playing a game, watching tv, or eating junkfood, or even getting pissed drunk every night can make you happy. But that's short term happyness. In the long term, this is a poisoneous lifestyle man.

Always focus on the longterm. Make goals, be dedicated to them, and achieve them.

If I can do this, so can you.

Best of luck.


p.s. if you need any help, or more detailed advice, PM me.

 

[FM 3321]

^^^

Thanks for that post MindOverMatter.

 

[Kaparski]

Well said Mindovermatter. I completely argee with his statement.

I too was 25%Bodyfat back in November in last year and when I came back from university, my dad told me how fat I had become (booze = bad). I guess that was my motivatior.

I now speak to you 6 months later at 14.5 Bodyfat and the results are astonding. Women talk to me WAYYYYYYYY more often, Is easier to talk to them, and most importantly i feel great and my depression has decreased as a result. Although I still have 5% to go, anyone can become attractive. As my brother has said, "everyone looks the same when your slim".

Regarding your question,
FM 3321

Definetly start. To be honest, fat people just aren't very attractive. Don't ask me why but walk down a street and consider yourself sleeping with one of those hethons, I think you get the picture. It's not hard losing the weight and you'll notice (from the social side) a huge difference with women within 1-2 months depending on how much u weigh you lose, amount of muscule you gain, attitude (comes with loss of weight) etc.....

As for bodybuilding, it ISN'T necessary but I would strongly recommend it. You dont have to be big and cut, but at least aim for being cut. go to www.bodybuilding.com and read some ALLINONE articles. There are a few REALLLLLLLLLLLYYY good ones which come with before and after pics, and other miscellaneous timbits. I highly recommend that than the one posted on here. You just get a bigger picture in that sites database . i still love u diesel.

The hole confidence / charm thing. Thro w the idea out the window (sry DJ's). My opinion, It will come naturally as it did for me when you lose weight. Our body and mind's are more receptive than we observe. Once girls starting asking things about you and writing their number all over your arm, your confidence and charm should flourish. That is to say keep reading these forums however, to get a picture on how to become successful with women (a difference between picking up a women and being successful with one).

Another point, don't try and mask your gut if you havent done the work. Some people like using plastic wrap and such around there body to get a good slim figure for the nite (tossing it away when they leave the bar). The FACE tells all. If there's a lot of fat around the face, theyll know (unconsciencely) your overweight.


AND MOST IMPORTANTLY! DO NOT GIVE UP LOSING THE WEIGHT. If you buds need to booze with you or want you to hit that lovely bong (munchies), **** it. Its not worth it. Get the 6 month cut cycle over and done with and you can eat all you want afterwards when your burning 3000 cal a day. Im a gon-ho person and i admit during this 'cut' phase I have lost LOTS of social bonding and friday nites. But then again Im only 20 and I got the rest of my 20's to catch up.

If you need to contact me, I'll be more than helpful to. Harrycallahan@gmail.com.

I thought this has shed some light on your question.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

In some ways, it is the only way. All this fat ugly banging chicks is mostly a myth.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by TheRelic
Agreed... don't listen to anyone that gives you a spiel about how you shouldn't do it for women.

Doing it for women is putting THEIR needs(wants) ahead of your own. With that mentality you might as well give them gifts all of the time because they enjoy gifts as much as the enjoy a fit man. You may think it's just semantics, but the difference creates a completely different, approval seeking mentality.

I am the first to say that being fit is beneficial to picking up women, but it does more good for the individual than it does for any single or group of women. I'm not bashing male attention wh0res either, but it seems strange to focus so much effort on just getting attention other that actually getting the women.

 

[TheRelic]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Doing it for women is putting THEIR needs(wants) ahead of your own. With that mentality you might as well give them gifts all of the time because they enjoy gifts as much as the enjoy a fit man. You may think it's just semantics, but the difference creates a completely different, approval seeking mentality.

I am the first to say that being fit is beneficial to picking up women, but it does more good for the individual than it does for any single or group of women. I'm not bashing male attention wh0res either, but it seems strange to focus so much effort on just getting attention other that actually getting the women.

Eaaaasy tiger ... The attention ***** comment wasn't meant for dissection... 'twas a bit of light heartedness .

You are right, doing it for womens approval is silly - that said, I don't know anyone that is such a severe AFC case to the point of losing sleep over females not paying homage to their body.

My line of thinking is much more relaxed... I want women... and a great body is just one more thing to kick a few hurdles off the seduction track! Everything that comes with a good physique is positive to game; as well as general wellbeing.

Plus yeah, I love being that dude that has the girls at the beach wanting to poke the physical manifestation of their hard work. Who wouldn't?

Working out is something that should be motivated by personal desire; whether that be to break a record, breathe easier, or aid in picking up women, I personally don't see a problem.

 

[manicmaximum]

I started working out to look better for chicks. I think a lot of us fall into that category

but once you start taking it seriously, that stops. you don't think to yourself, "man, one more rep will mean 5 lays! so I have to push one more time"

there's a line you cross where you start to do it for personal reasons, to push your limits and to better yourself.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The chick thing is definitely a (welcome) byproduct of why I stay fit. My thing is that it makes my life easier. I'm healthy, my clothes fit, my confidence is unmeasurable and I kick my buds @sses road racing! But I will admit that I enjoy it when a group of women stop me and my buds when we're out for a ride and they ask if I'm a professional racer.