being friends before dating

[fezz]

so guys, what do you think about being friends before dating???

Two friends of mine that are girls were best friends with their boyfriends before they started dating. They both told me they built up alot of trust in each other before they dated their men since they were good friends with them. the relationships for both of them have lasted quite long also. What do you all think about this?? I think its a little awkward when I date a person I have been friends with. It almost goes against the teachings of the site in a way, but I have noticed it has worked in many cases for my friends. Do you think that with some people, even if you are in "the friends zone" that there is a good possibility to hook up, or do you all think it is stupid to date someone you arent good friends with, and that it is always best to date someone you dont really know that well?

 

[Viking25]

From what I see...it is the best way to start dating and anything long term. I know how much it contradicts with DJ bible n all. But I saw it happend more times then I care to count. LOL...all my relationships started like that too...we were friends first.

I thought about it more..and here's what I realised: some girls might pretend to be just friends while wanting to fukk your brains out. I think that's what it was in my case.

 

[alakazam]

I think there's a difference between being "friends" and being "FRIENDS".

I mean, you may label each other as "friends" but you both are attracted to each other and so on. If you're in the "friends" category...well good luck getting out of that

I don't really think there's anything wrong with being casual acquainteces with a chick before you hook up, just don't become her emotional tampon.

 

[popcorn]

Didnt work for me

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Originally posted by alakazam
I think there's a difference between being "friends" and being "FRIENDS".

I mean, you may label each other as "friends" but you both are attracted to each other and so on. If you're in the "friends" category...well good luck getting out of that

I don't really think there's anything wrong with being casual acquainteces with a chick before you hook up, just don't become her emotional tampon.

BUMP!! Exactly!! Being labled as a "friend" doesn't really mean your in the friend zone to start off with. I know tons of girls who tell me that were friends but I know if I tried to get them to hook up, they would!! Its ok to be friends first, just don't be the emotional tampon friend.



PIMP

 

[fezz]

ya, I think your right. There is a big difference between being friends and being FRIENDS. Being a friend with the girl almost gives you an advantage in a way before you date her too, since you already know what type of person shes like and if shes a flaky dum b1tch or a really loyal girl.

 

[silverwex]

I think this is a good way to do, but only if you're looking for an LTR.

Rules can be bent.

 

[becker]

Despite the countless threads on this, this topic keeps coming up.

Bottom line: if you're an ugly guy and you're not sensing that she sees you romantically, then you're in the friends zone and you can bet your a$$ that she's going to pour her heart out to you while lamenting over a jerk-BF.

However, if she avoids that topic and you can tell she's into you, then you're probably in the "friends" transitional period, where you are friends for now, but it's merely an intermediate stage which can either become something more or nothing at all depending on how you take it.

Girls always friend-zone ugly guys who are nice because they always feel bad and have trouble being mean to guys that are so nice to them. They don't like conflict like that. The only exception to this is a girl who is comparably ugly.

I know, sounds harsh, but someone has to say it.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by fezz
so guys, what do you think about being friends before dating???

Two friends of mine that are girls were best friends with their boyfriends before they started dating. They both told me they built up alot of trust in each other before they dated their men since they were good friends with them. the relationships for both of them have lasted quite long also. What do you all think about this?? I think its a little awkward when I date a person I have been friends with. It almost goes against the teachings of the site in a way, but I have noticed it has worked in many cases for my friends. Do you think that with some people, even if you are in "the friends zone" that there is a good possibility to hook up, or do you all think it is stupid to date someone you arent good friends with, and that it is always best to date someone you dont really know that well?

I've said this many times, but I'll say it again...the "friend zone" doesn't exist. It's a myth. When anyone you are friends with and want to date anyone(male or female), if they truly like your personality and are attracted to you, they are going to like you too. You are NOT hurting your chances with a girl by first being her friend. If you have a good, solid friendship and she is attracted to you, she'll date you if she's single unless there is something about your personality or behavior that turns her off.

Women won't date guys for typically 3 reasons.

1) They aren't attracted to you.
2) Something about your personality turns them off.
3) Something about your behavior turns them off.

If a woman says "let's just be friends" (or any variation of this) it's because of one of the above reasons. More often than not, it's attraction.

So, to make a long story short...the "friend zone" isn't something you end up in because you were friends first. It's something you end up in because she isn't interested and wouldn't have been regardless of whether you were friends first or not.

On top of this, the best and most long lasting relationship evolve out of friendship because the people actually care about each other already and are less likely to be inconsiderate to you. They'll invest more and be a better significant other.

 

[becker]

Well put Wyldfire, I agree with you on that one.

 

[jakethasnake]

Originally posted by alakazam
I think there's a difference between being "friends" and being "FRIENDS".

I mean, you may label each other as "friends" but you both are attracted to each other and so on. If you're in the "friends" category...well good luck getting out of that

I don't really think there's anything wrong with being casual acquainteces with a chick before you hook up, just don't become her emotional tampon.

Sweet post, bro.

 

[sunnysb]

I've said this many times, but I'll say it again...the "friend zone" doesn't exist. It's a myth. When anyone you are friends with and want to date anyone(male or female), if they truly like your personality and are attracted to you, they are going to like you too. You are NOT hurting your chances with a girl by first being her friend. If you have a good, solid friendship and she is attracted to you, she'll date you if she's single unless there is something about your personality or behavior that turns her off.

Women won't date guys for typically 3 reasons.

1) They aren't attracted to you.
2) Something about your personality turns them off.
3) Something about your behavior turns them off.

If a woman says "let's just be friends" (or any variation of this) it's because of one of the above reasons. More often than not, it's attraction.

So, to make a long story short...the "friend zone" isn't something you end up in because you were friends first. It's something you end up in because she isn't interested and wouldn't have been regardless of whether you were friends first or not.

On top of this, the best and most long lasting relationship evolve out of friendship because the people actually care about each other already and are less likely to be inconsiderate to you. They'll invest more and be a better significant other.

I disagree. I'm a female. This guy that I do like (am interested in) asked me out to dinner. I said no. The reason I said no is because we both have a lot of stuff were dealing with. Like someone else said, I told him I want to be friends first not because I think hes ugly or I don't like his personality, but because I want to really get to know him. I can see it being a real relationsglhop, and i dont want to screw it up now because of the situations we both find ourselves in now. I dont want to ruin a potentially good thing because i rushed into something i wasnt ready for. And by the way, just because a girl says she wants to be friends doesn't mean she doesn't lust after you.

 

[Vidrio]

I disagree. I'm a female. This guy that I do like (am interested in) asked me out to dinner. I said no. The reason I said no is because we both have a lot of stuff were dealing with. Like someone else said, I told him I want to be friends first not because I think hes ugly or I don't like his personality, but because I want to really get to know him. I can see it being a real relationsglhop, and i dont want to screw it up now because of the situations we both find ourselves in now. I dont want to ruin a potentially good thing because i rushed into something i wasnt ready for. And by the way, just because a girl says she wants to be friends doesn't mean she doesn't lust after you.

Why would you bump a damn near decade old thread?