Becoming "exclusive" without being a P***, or take the 'playa' route?

[otr4]

Hey everyone--
I haven't been on the site for a while, but I've been making some
serious progress.
I've been dating three girls. One I've casually dated, another I'm somewhat serious about and there's one I'm really starting to like.
The one girl I'm really starting to like, "Amy," is awesome and right from the start she and I hit it off. Our first date lasted TWO DAYS! I've been seeing her for about 3 weeks and we have been engaged it some really kinky stuff. We have spent the night at each other's houses almost every time we have hung out (including our first date) and I know this is the girl that will actually make all my sexual fantasies come true and I'm really starting to fall for her (but I haven't let on to this and I've played it really cool). I can tell she really likes me because she calls ME to hang out, has made me dinner and breakfast (in the same day) AND never wants me to leave when we're hanging out. On top of all of this, she is HOT and is totally turned on by me...
My question is this: I almost feel like this girl is my girlfriend, (even though we have only been hanging out for three weeks) and I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with her, but I really don't want to bring up the whole "Are we boyfriend-girlfriend?" conversation but I ALSO don't want to keep wondering what is going on with us. How would you guys deal with this situation so you don't come off as a wuss? The thing is, I have this other girl I'm starting starting to like too (but who I haven't hung out with as much) and I kind of want to know SOON if the girl I'm really starting to like, Amy, is actually into me in the "relationship" sense.
At first I was into the whole " PLAYA, dating a bunch of different girls" thing, but I think it might be more trouble than it's worth and I don't want to pass up an awesome girl...What do you guys think about this?
What's the best route to take in this situation?

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

The playa routine will in a relationship fvck you up except if you don't find some h0 or desp or strange chick.

 

[HuuBinh]

if you like amy and want a relationship with her, don't ask just show your interested by taking things to the physical level.

 

[otr4]

Amy and I have already taken things to the "physical level."
The question that I've posed in this post is: "Now what?"

 

[jbbrain]

Originally posted by otr4
Hey everyone--
I haven't been on the site for a while, but I've been making some
serious progress.


-Good. Wasnt it you who recently dumped a chick because you thought she was untrustworthy? Whatver the case..it feels good to be back in the game, doesnt it?


I've been dating three girls. One I've casually dated, another I'm somewhat serious about and there's one I'm really starting to like.

-Even better news..thats what I like to hear.


The one girl I'm really starting to like, "Amy," is awesome and right from the start she and I hit it off. Our first date lasted TWO DAYS! I've been seeing her for about 3 weeks and we have been engaged it some really kinky stuff. We have spent the night at each other's houses almost every time we have hung out (including our first date) and I know this is the girl that will actually make all my sexual fantasies come true and I'm really starting to fall for her (but I haven't let on to this and I've played it really cool).

-You dont have to play the stone cold DJ in order to protect your heart or raise her IL or any of thatt shyt. All we're REALLY asking here is just for you to be a little REALISTIC. Use a little perspective. Now, you like this girl a lot. She has rung a few bells in your head. Celebrate that, but be mindful that you only know eachother for a very brief period of time. Thought of LTR should only naturally come AFTER a good solid period of qualification. Learn some more about her..have her learn more about you, THEN make a decision. Some dudes on this site are always acting like theyre in the biggest rush of their lives when it comes to women..RELAX. As long as you guys are enjoying eachothers company, have great sex etc etc. Noones goign anywhere, and if they do..so what? Youve known this girl 3 weeks!


I can tell she really likes me because she calls ME to hang out, has made me dinner and breakfast (in the same day) AND never wants me to leave when we're hanging out. On top of all of this, she is HOT and is totally turned on by me...


-Right..yeah..she likes you.


My question is this: I almost feel like this girl is my girlfriend, (even though we have only been hanging out for three weeks) and I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with her, but I really don't want to bring up the whole "Are we boyfriend-girlfriend?" conversation but I ALSO don't want to keep wondering what is going on with us.

-You need a change in perspective brother. You shouldnt FEEL this girl to be your girlfriend, unless there is that odd chance that you really feel that you guys are "soul mates" and destined for eachother (I dont really subscribe to taht shyt so much..but hey)...like I said..give it time. Not only will it allow you to better qualify her as a recipient of your valuable emotions, it will also show...dammit..you know what I mean. She'll like you MORE for it in the future. Trust me on that one.



How would you guys deal with this situation so you don't come off as a wuss?


-Its easy. Dont be a wuss. Let her come to you bro..take the time..youre fvcking..let it all happen organically, not from some perceived pressure or some volatile and inconsistent phase of infatuation.

The thing is, I have this other girl I'm starting starting to like too (but who I haven't hung out with as much) and I kind of want to know SOON if the girl I'm really starting to like, Amy, is actually into me in the "relationship" sense.


-Dont do it dude. You know better than to have "that talk". YOU JUST MET THE GIRL.



At first I was into the whole " PLAYA, dating a bunch of different girls" thing, but I think it might be more trouble than it's worth and I don't want to pass up an awesome girl...What do you guys think about this?


-No offense, but something tells me you havent thoroughly enjoyed the fruits of the "single life"..dating and fvcking any and every girl you want to date and fvck. I wouldnt be so quick to dismiss it. Now..about this girl. Dont put the pressure on yourself or on her to have that talk or push for commitment. Like I said, enjoy yourselves together. Get to know eachother better. If everyhting is going as great as it seems, noone will be going anywhere..More than that, she'll appreciate and savour the wait and the anticipation.

 

[E-Z Rider]

Here's how I look at it:

There's nothing wrong with being in a good commited relationship, any more so than there is with being single.

So to me it doesn't make sense to hold back just because you want to try to uphold the 'playa' image or whatever. Do what you feel like.

However...don't worry about it until the girl starts bugging you about being exclusive. If she is really interested, she will start dropping hints and eventually tell you straight up she wants to be exclusive. You don't need to make a decision until she asks you straight-up.

In the meantime, have your cake and eat it too.

-E-Z

 

[PlayerSupreme]

1. give it more time. Just because she is doing all this for you right now, doesn't mean she is the "one"

2. women put their best stuff up front to sell you on them...then it changes....

3. just cause the sex is good and she seems to be in servitude with the cooking and stuff doesn't mean you truely know her. Remember her goal is to win YOU by any means necessary....and if it means taking a dyck up her bumm and cooking meals for you then that is what she will do. some women know how to play the game by marketing themselves to you...these actually are the best ones out there...but take your time.

4. when your ready then leave your player lifestyle behind. nothing is worse than getting into a relationship and still wanting to be a player...the two don't work.

 

[NewMan]

What next?

Nothing.

Just continue doing what you doing - have fun and hang out with her.

Don't rush it - this will naturally happen, so don't force this into a relationship.

Chances are she feels the same - but let it mature in it's own time.

 

[DJnomore]

Just do it more...

There is no need to ask if you exclusive if you are seeing each other all the time...

 

[fezz]

Ya, my advice is just to do what you've been doing. Her IL seems like it's out of the roof now, and if she really likes you, then she'll ask you about becoming exclusive, but until then, just have fun, because from what it sounds like, you already are exclusive