Almost every DJ or recovering AFC on the So Suave forum would have at some point (normally when not having much success with women) struggled with either porn addiction or excessive masturbation. Often the two are interrelated.
There’s even the “infamous” masturbation thread devoted to this.
Masturbation is one of those funny things…if you’ve got girl(s) who you’re banging on a regular basis, masturbating is not a big deal and sometimes a must to ensure you “last the distance” but if you’re single and not currently getting many women, it can be the kiss of death.
Masturbating to porn is in some ways the perfect drug. Freely available, you can choose your situation and preferred type of girl, and it doesn’t haven’t any of the risks in real life like fear of approaching or STDs.
On the negative, and outweighing all of these in the longer-term, is that it in no way helps you improve your life, and takes away the motivation to approach women in real life.
Imagine what your life would be like if you knew that no matter how much you wanted to, you couldn’t look up porn on your computer. Of course, you’d go out and get some from real girls instead, right?
Normally, the advice to beat porn addiction is to simply use your willpower to not do it. But in my experience, this is bound to failure for some (myself included!). Like any addiction, using tools to assist is likely to increase the chances of success.
It will depend on what software everyone uses, but here is a solution I adopted that I have found very successful (using Trend Micro Internet Security Pro).
[If you don’t use any sort of virus or Internet control software and you’re looking up porn, then G*d help you!]
1) Use the parental controls to block whatever category of site you don’t want to be able to access (e.g. porn sites). Also individually block any particular sites you don’t want to be able to access anymore (using a wildcard of *porn* cuts down on quite a few!)
2) Set the web access schedule so you can only access the Internet during certain set periods. For example, I set 1 hour per night for the Internet from Monday – Thursday (since I know from my past patterns that I’m never really tempted to look at porn during these times).
Setting that kind of time limit also helps to cut down on other time you waste surfing the web.
3) Set a random password (e.g. ah4 3j5 38c skg 95n 398 32j 1nd ekq) that you can’t possibly remember to lock access to the settings from 1) and 2), preferably at least 20 characters long.
4) After you’ve made the settings and password change, either
a. Throw the password away (for the very brave! – no turning back now..).
b. Or copy it into an e-mail to yourself and save it in your online e-mail (that means you can still access the password, but only during those brief times when you have allowed yourself internet access). That reduces the possible time of succumbing to temptation from 168 hours a week down to 4 hours a week – much easier!
I’d suggest going with 4 b) to start.
Don’t use the excuse that you don’t have to software to do it – do a web search and you can track something down easy enough.
Obviously, the above tip will not help you in attracting women. There are many more important issues that are addressed in other tips on this forum.
But by eliminating porn from your life, this will (at first) force you to achieve your attraction from real women and make you more active in going out there to get the kind of women you desire.
Many days into the future, you’ll wonder how porn had such a hold over your life…but for now, bold steps must be taken on the long road to victory.
JUST DO IT!
There’s even the “infamous” masturbation thread devoted to this.
Masturbation is one of those funny things…if you’ve got girl(s) who you’re banging on a regular basis, masturbating is not a big deal and sometimes a must to ensure you “last the distance” but if you’re single and not currently getting many women, it can be the kiss of death.
Masturbating to porn is in some ways the perfect drug. Freely available, you can choose your situation and preferred type of girl, and it doesn’t haven’t any of the risks in real life like fear of approaching or STDs.
On the negative, and outweighing all of these in the longer-term, is that it in no way helps you improve your life, and takes away the motivation to approach women in real life.
Imagine what your life would be like if you knew that no matter how much you wanted to, you couldn’t look up porn on your computer. Of course, you’d go out and get some from real girls instead, right?
Normally, the advice to beat porn addiction is to simply use your willpower to not do it. But in my experience, this is bound to failure for some (myself included!). Like any addiction, using tools to assist is likely to increase the chances of success.
It will depend on what software everyone uses, but here is a solution I adopted that I have found very successful (using Trend Micro Internet Security Pro).
[If you don’t use any sort of virus or Internet control software and you’re looking up porn, then G*d help you!]
1) Use the parental controls to block whatever category of site you don’t want to be able to access (e.g. porn sites). Also individually block any particular sites you don’t want to be able to access anymore (using a wildcard of *porn* cuts down on quite a few!)
2) Set the web access schedule so you can only access the Internet during certain set periods. For example, I set 1 hour per night for the Internet from Monday – Thursday (since I know from my past patterns that I’m never really tempted to look at porn during these times).
Setting that kind of time limit also helps to cut down on other time you waste surfing the web.
3) Set a random password (e.g. ah4 3j5 38c skg 95n 398 32j 1nd ekq) that you can’t possibly remember to lock access to the settings from 1) and 2), preferably at least 20 characters long.
4) After you’ve made the settings and password change, either
a. Throw the password away (for the very brave! – no turning back now..).
b. Or copy it into an e-mail to yourself and save it in your online e-mail (that means you can still access the password, but only during those brief times when you have allowed yourself internet access). That reduces the possible time of succumbing to temptation from 168 hours a week down to 4 hours a week – much easier!
I’d suggest going with 4 b) to start.
Don’t use the excuse that you don’t have to software to do it – do a web search and you can track something down easy enough.
Obviously, the above tip will not help you in attracting women. There are many more important issues that are addressed in other tips on this forum.
But by eliminating porn from your life, this will (at first) force you to achieve your attraction from real women and make you more active in going out there to get the kind of women you desire.
Many days into the future, you’ll wonder how porn had such a hold over your life…but for now, bold steps must be taken on the long road to victory.
JUST DO IT!
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