What exactly do women want out of a date?
Focus on having fun. That's what girls want, and it should be what you want as well, regardless of the 'outcome'. In fact, that's the only outcome you need.
So far, without knowing finer details of other dates, I observe the following:
-You are spending too much time on dates. Six hours is probably too long for a fourth date, let alone a first. It seems like you have no urgency to get back to other priorities in life; therefore dating whichever specific woman, seems like your only priority. Your time doesn't seem precious because you can happily spend 6 hours at the drop of a hat with someone you hardly know. This makes you (at least seem) low value.
My personal first date (and second date) preference - The Three Bar Bounce:
http://the3bromigos.com/2013/03/04/the-best-first-date-advice-you-will-read-this-year/
-You do online dating; online dating = flakefest / fckfest / attention-deficient prole-fest
-You are focused heavily on tangible specifics, that are objectified in your own mind.....
I’m an attractive guy, intelligent, financially stable, and I like to think I’m confident and funny,
.... you forget modesty on that list

Dude, you are preaching from the Cosmopolitan Textbook of Eligible Batchelorism. Don't you think that women have the numbers of eligible men coming out of their ears. You're not that different from the rest man. Sorry to pull that plug for you. Above all else, you are probably stumbling over your own ego and expectations of the dates. This will be tangible to the women you meet and again is a sign of desperation and a man without options.
SOLUTION:
-Forget everything you know about traditional 'dating'. In fact, don't go on dates AT ALL, until a
girl suggests it. It's antiquated. As I've said before, go out and meet women on the hoof, learn to HAVE FUN, learn to be a fun person (by having fun), so much so that women actually start approaching you. Then, and only then, can you expect to possibly date someone in the medium to longer term.
-You don't get the second date? Who fcking cares man, because you had fun anyway. And you should have another woman lined up in a couple of days time anyway. You're thinking about monogamy before you even know someone properly.
Long story short, you're not giving off the right energy at the moment. You are focused on vague, subjective, personal characteristics that you think (have been taught) ALL women 'should' be attracted to.
The only thing that ALL women are attracted to? A relaxed, carefree fun vibe.