B.S.!!, girls & their bfs. Should i be the gf stealer?

solo1

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 12, 2005
Messages
267
Reaction score
0
Guys i think im gonna puke. I just got back from class with this girl, we took the same train cause we're on the same route.

So her IL is high, i've built great rapport with her with kino and she even playful hit me tonight. Everything is going smooth. And i was hoping to ask her out before we part. ...then she asks me my living situation. then i ask her hers....BOOM
"(mumble) living with family" i ask "wait your family's in ny?" her: "im living with my bf's mom" (or im living with my bf & his mom) dont remember which way it came out, but bf word came up nonetheless.
I guess she was scared to scare me off. I played it cool and asked if her bf was born here, she dindt really seem like she wanted to talk about it so i changed the topic. And we continue to talk as if she never mentioned him. i didnt bother asking her out cause i was unsure if i should even go that route aka "the gf stealer"

Prior to today, i had invited her to go eat w/me after class, however she gave a reasonable excuse, (it was last minute so i understand) and we exchanged #'s.

I understand that girls will easily cheat at the drop of a hat...and "upgrade bfs". But i also tend to believe that if a relationship is going to crumble, it will happen overtime regardless.

Im glad she told me. Im in a similar situation where im just FWB with another girl, however she chased me in the beginning w/o telling me until a month later....which was also BS. Haha...i dunno i feel like i want to ask my FWB, but it feels somewhat inappropriate to make her jealous.

im almost 100% certain if i ask her out she will agree. It seems most girls nowadays are taken, the only single ones left are ones with emotional baggage.

Im not in despair, there are more fish in the sea. But im just disappointed and have a loss for words.

What do you guys gotta say? Be the gf stealer or make her a friend?
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2005
Messages
130
Reaction score
0
Age
51
Location
New York
My two cents....

Depends on you... I personally couldn't do it. Do you really think that there will be a chance for the two of you long term in this case? I think not, because if she's willing to change gears why wouldn't she do it to you. Befriend her and atleast you'll have a girl to hook up with others girl through.

On the other hand... If you are the type that could do it AND you're not looking for anything long term then you'd be doing him a favor. She'd bail sooner or later. Although he won't see it till later. She's just not woman enough to so it now.
 

Jester

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 6, 2001
Messages
1,949
Reaction score
7
Location
NJ, USA
uhh shes living with the boyfriends family?

uhh lol that sucks for the boyfriend.

sounds like a wacko to me man dont give her your address lol
 

solo1

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 12, 2005
Messages
267
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by Jester
uhh shes living with the boyfriends family?

uhh lol that sucks for the boyfriend.

sounds like a wacko to me man dont give her your address lol
yes...she's an international student. Im pretty sure she's just leeching off them.

Originally posted by ADifferentKindofDJ
Depends on you... I personally couldn't do it. Do you really think that there will be a chance for the two of you long term in this case? I think not, because if she's willing to change gears why wouldn't she do it to you. Befriend her and atleast you'll have a girl to hook up with others girl through.

On the other hand... If you are the type that could do it AND you're not looking for anything long term then you'd be doing him a favor. She'd bail sooner or later. Although he won't see it till later. She's just not woman enough to so it now.
i know i know...that's whats always being said, "if she cheats on her bf, what guarantee is there she wont do it to you?"
My personal opinion is that all women are capable of cheating and will cheat, if presented with the right opportunity and with time.

personally i've never been in a relationship. But the way i see it, most people fall out of relationships due to outside forces (new guy/girl comes a long and woos them), and inside forces (relationship gets boring/redundant) and most if not all relationships come to an end eventually.

I dont know, the way i see it we get along great. And im not planning on LTR w/anyone atm. perhaps ill ask her to coffee or dinner some other time and see where this goes. However, if i end up kiss closing, i have a gut feeling im just shooting myself in the foot....cause the bf is still in the picture.
 

In2theGame

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2005
Messages
2,194
Reaction score
1,146
Age
41
Location
New York City
Originally posted by solo1
Guys i think im gonna puke. I just got back from class with this girl, we took the same train cause we're on the same route.

So her IL is high, i've built great rapport with her with kino and she even playful hit me tonight. Everything is going smooth. And i was hoping to ask her out before we part. ...then she asks me my living situation. then i ask her hers....BOOM
"(mumble) living with family" i ask "wait your family's in ny?" her: "im living with my bf's mom" (or im living with my bf & his mom) dont remember which way it came out, but bf word came up nonetheless.
I guess she was scared to scare me off. I played it cool and asked if her bf was born here, she dindt really seem like she wanted to talk about it so i changed the topic. And we continue to talk as if she never mentioned him. i didnt bother asking her out cause i was unsure if i should even go that route aka "the gf stealer"

Prior to today, i had invited her to go eat w/me after class, however she gave a reasonable excuse, (it was last minute so i understand) and we exchanged #'s.

I understand that girls will easily cheat at the drop of a hat...and "upgrade bfs". But i also tend to believe that if a relationship is going to crumble, it will happen overtime regardless.

Im glad she told me. Im in a similar situation where im just FWB with another girl, however she chased me in the beginning w/o telling me until a month later....which was also BS. Haha...i dunno i feel like i want to ask my FWB, but it feels somewhat inappropriate to make her jealous.

im almost 100% certain if i ask her out she will agree. It seems most girls nowadays are taken, the only single ones left are ones with emotional baggage.

Im not in despair, there are more fish in the sea. But im just disappointed and have a loss for words.

What do you guys gotta say? Be the gf stealer or make her a friend?
Id say get another girl. The real Don Juans focus on multiple girls. if she has a man then oh well... let it be and leave it alone. Be her friend, but if she wants you... She will let you know.
 
Top