Awkward Co-Worker Situation...

[DreamyChick]

Tes you wrote a novel here too I had to read it 3 times to understand what you were saying.

 

[italyfourever]

you may not realise this but this is really a classic seduction technique wherby you seduce someone without making your desires so obvious...you can actually make the person your trying to seduce break down and bring up the subject themselves. Now he may have not been doing this intentionally but is caught in this web.

My hunch is that he may try to leave without contact but will have a hard time forgetting you since you gave him so much attention, unless his gf fills that void, which I doubt it. He will then contact you......just my opinion

Both of you will have a hard time getting over each other after he leaves. best of luck

 

[DreamyChick]

Originally posted by italyfourever
you may not realise this but this is really a classic seduction technique wherby you seduce someone without making your desires so obvious...you can actually make the person your trying to seduce break down and bring up the subject themselves. Now he may have not been doing this intentionally but is caught in this web.

My hunch is that he may try to leave without contact but will have a hard time forgetting you since you gave him so much attention, unless his gf fills that void, which I doubt it. He will then contact you......just my opinion

Both of you will have a hard time getting over each other after he leaves. best of luck

That technique you speak of is it in the dj bible? I personally don't think he will keep in contact with me after he leaves, but he may eventually contact me like you say. But I think it will be hard once he's gone.

I haven't mentioned this bc its pretty insignificant I think but here it goes. One day he and I were talking about hobbies and he mentioned that he used to be into drawing. For some reason this didn't surprise me. At the time, I had some friends in a band so I asked him if he would like to work on a drawing of them for me. He told me sure and we sat down and picked through photos of the guys that he thought would be good to draw and then we printed it out. Then he tells me that he will work on it that weekend but to be patient bc its going to take him some time. Then the following week he comes in and tells me that his gf had inquired why he stopped drawing and if he would draw her something and then he told her that he had already promised me and then another female coworker over heard and was laughing and said Dreamy are you trying to get him in trouble with the coworker and since that day I have made no mention of the drawing again.

I should also mention that our office is very family oriented we go out to lunch to celebrate things like b-day and christmas with each other and so everyone chips in to buy gifts for the person on their birthday so its not completely unnatural to give gifts. However, I recently found myself in a situation with the coworker that I didn't feel good about.


Not too long ago he went off to Beligum with his gf and another couple. When he returned he brought back some chocolate for the office. We love to eat and with 12 people that chocolate vanished in two days. Much to my surprise he came in the next day and brought me in some chocolate from his stash at home and told me not to let the boss find it.

Well he's always doing nice things for me like offering to get me some lunch or something when I can't leave the office to helping me when my back window in my car shattered. I paniced and thought someone had tried to break in and he took over bc I was in shock and didnt know what to do. Then he and another coworker helped me get the pieces of glass out of the car so I could drive it home.

So I decided to repay the gratitude and gave him an imported beer that my mother picked up on a business trip to NYC. I had reservations about doing it but my mother insisted it would be fine so I went and ahead and gave it to him in a gift bag with some other knick knacks like matches and things to help him relax. He really liked it and shared with everyone about what I did. Which I wish he hadn't.

To make matters worse my own mother seems to sense something between us(she's met me for lunch at my office on a couple of occassions and has spoken with him) and she says she sees the way he gives me his full attention.... and is encouraging me to exchange numbers when he leaves. Of course this suggestion is unsettling to me.

 

[TesuqueRed]

italy is right on

I think the technique (among many) is to relax, lean back (I mean, like an internal pose of assurance and knowledge) and hold the awareness in your head, and hold the thought in your mind when looking at him that "this is quality stuff here (meaning you) so if you want it you have to come get it. But I won't wait, so make your decision." The challenge is really on him, isn't it? Maybe he's not ready or doesn't have what it takes, or maybe he does. Before too long you'll see.

 

[DreamyChick]

Going crazy trying to figure out what I am getting for my b-day

This post is sort of related to this topic being as its dealing with the same coworker, but not really. Guys just ignore, if you want but now I am going crazy.

Okay so my b-day is coming up, along with the boss'nupitals, and we all chip in for a gift for special occassions such as this.

So I go back today and hand over my money to my coworker to which he mentions that a coworker has already given him my money? I was like what are you talking about? He replied oh I am just confused. It was for your b-day gift. Dontcha know you aren't supposed to talk about that. He replied oh I am not gonna tell you what you are getting but let me tell you you are really gonna like it. I approved it. Me: Oh really you approved it? Yes. Did you pick it out? No, then how do you know I am gonna like it? I don't but I have a feeling you will. He smiles.


What the heck? He approved it? Should I feel special because he approved the gift?LOL I got a kick out of that. He approved it. Sorry I love it. So what do you think they got me? I hope I love it cause now I am gonna go crazy trying to figure it out.

 

[Kaine]

Guys can be flirty too, I know I can chum it up with female coworkers too, but that doesn't mean I'm going to leave my extremely hot and sexy gf for a peice of office tail. You obviously have the hots for him, and as a women I am not suprised you are a slave to your emotions because of this.


I find this example particularly intriguing as it reinforces my belief that women's choice of mates are heavily influenced by her relationship with her parents. Girls who go for jerks because their dad were ba$tards or guys who can take up a role as their surrogate father because their daddies were so unavailable.


Guys, when you first date a chick, get to know her family history and I guarantee it will give you some insight into her psychology and type of guy she will be attracted.

This can help you decide whether she is gf material or not and the type of personality that she will be most attracted too.


Kaine

 

[DreamyChick]

He Left and Basically this is what happened in a nutshell....

When everyone left excluding the boss, M and I sat in his office and he told me about one of his first big cases with our office right after he started. It was a murder case, but none the less I could tell he was feeling a bit sentimental and reflective. He believes the client really didn't do it. Then we talked about his plans to get his office ready to open on Halloween and then we both got ready to leave.

The boss said his good byes first and then I waited. M asked me for a hug and some how the plant I gave him was mentioned. I joked with him that I got the plant so he could experience the responsibility for caring for a plant like I had. Because he teased me relentlessly about being a plant killer.

He had told me that he wanted to me to send pics of my plant with my emails to him so he would know for sure it was still alive. Boss laughed and I said you know M if your plant dies on you I will be disappointed and he was like I wont and I said lets bet and he was all okay let's make the bet interesting.

How I asked?

Let's say who ever kills the their plant first has to take the other out to lunch. I lit up when he mentioned meeting up for lunch and said deal.

But I said let's also say that the loser has to drive to the winner's town and he said okay.

Then the boss left us and we got in our cars and I said well, I'll email you to check in and he said feel free to and I said I just might take you up on that offer and I said I hope you don't regret it, and he said I won't. Then he drove off.

 

[DreamyChick]

And yes when I agreed to have lunch with him sometime all thoughts of the advice you all gave me was no where to be found. Sheesh bangs my head on the desk. Please remember he was the one that said we should meet for lunch not me and also remember that it could be harmless as well.

 

[DreamyChick]

Bumping

 

[bbestar]

Originally posted by DreamyChick
Okay so I can't believe I am going to post about this but here it goes. Wyldfire I could especially use your input.

Here is my delima. Okay so I have been working in a law office for about a year now and we're fairly small around 12 employees. We all get along really well, but there are about 3 coworkers I really click with. So anyway there is one guy an attorney who is 30 and he and I are the closest in age. He is someone that I have grown to respect and go to for advice, knowledge etc. He knows the law and ever since I have been there he has been very open to my picking his brain to learn more about the field. Over time we have gotten comfortable with teasing each other. The general office environment is like this. We all love to tease. Anyway, I guess because we are close in age I feel I can relate to him the most.

He usually teases me about me being a plant killer ( I have killed three plants while working there) to my desire to get married. He says I have to learn to cook to find a husband. He is the opposite the thought of marriage or kids absolutely frightens him and I have teased him about it as well. Our teasing is always really good natured and from time to time I have seen our coworkers take notice of how we get in the moment of teasing each other. For me this has always been in fun bc he has a gf and he would never want marriage which I do.

However, there are a lot of things I do like about him. His drive, how he seems balanced--doesn't get hot headed, how he has respect for me and looks out for me. He will apologize when he realizes he has cursed in front of me to him telling me I need to slow down and take time off of work before I get burned out. We seemed to be building a friendship.

Recently I pulled the best prank on him. It was probably around a month ago, when he came and asked if we had a flash light bc a mouse was in his office. I didn't immediately run to his rescue but when I did I found that he was in another office all together. So naturally I teased him about being afraid of a rodent and he said that he just didn't want it crawling under his feet. So finally I go with him to search for the mouse in his office. I bent down to look near a bookcase and it came running out and I screamed and he jumped which I almost expected him to land on his desk. So he was like now do you believe me. The very next day my boss has managed to catch the tiny field mouse in a trash can so while my coworker is gone to lunch I sneak the trash can in under his desk. It takes him about half an hour to realize it but he calls me out on it and he's smiling promising revenge. See whenever we interact his eyes always get big and he starts smiling almost as wide and its just interesting.

Well, last week the boss sends out an announcement saying that this coworker has decided to go into private practice which through prior discussions with him I knew this was something he wanted to do I just didn't expect it to be so soon. Boss sent out this really great tribute to coworker though and joked about ways we could get him to stay and how he will be irreplaceable ect.

So it's now been a week and this coworker and I have barely spoken except on matters of work. I haven't really reacted to his leaving yet. Because I absolutely don't know what to say. But I find myself wanting to go speak to him in his office only to get halfway there to his door and stop bc he looks busy where as before I had no problem checking in with him. Tuesday, I was leaving work and the coworker was talking to the boss inside but came outside on the sidewalk as I was getting ready to walk to my car. Boss was still inside and coworker seemed to be looking for something and when I thought he saw me he didn't say goodbye. Boss said something and he responded and went back inside. I was perplexed why he was outside bc he didnt take a smoke break. Then this morning he was walking out of my office and I walked in and we walked right past each other and not a word. Then before lunch I walked through his office and asked how it was going and he said fine and that was it. Then something strange happened. Then this afternoon he had left to go do jail visits and about 15 minutes later he walked back in the office and he was like Dreamy could you check on the computer for a file for me if you aren't too busy?

He emphasized how he didn't want to interrupt me and so we walk in my office and he starts jabbering about this file. He mentions how he saw there was a probation violation and how it didn't appear to have been opened as a seperate file. I look it up in the system and sure enough hes right and I sit down at the computer check and he gets right up near the screen over my shoulder to look too. We both wear glasses.

Anyway so he asks me if I can set up the file and I say sure no problem do you need it before you go to the jail and he was like no. So guys if he didn't need the file for a client in jail why did he not just go to the jails and then come in tomorrow and tell me? Seems a little strange to me. Is it all in my head or are yall picking up some weird vibes too?

I really don't want things to be awkward between us. He's not leaving for another month or so, so I want things to sort of go back to normal between us. He's been cutting up with everyone else in the office except me this week. I know hes tying up loose ends with his cases but why is he teasing everyone else but me now? Oh last week he came in my office and asked me to look uo another case and he came face to face with an instant message with a guy I briefly semi-hooked up with. I think the guy left a message about being horny or something. Maybe that has something to do with it? Maybe it's just all in my head.

Any thoughts?

u type too much

 

[blueangel83]

 

[blueangel83]

This guy sounds like a cheater/player. He has a gilfriend yet he's giving you that much attention. Honestly, would you want to start a relationship with a person like that? Imagine him flirting with other women while he's with you. Not good.

In my opinion, he is trying to get some quick p*ssy from you before he leaves.

 

[penkitten]

he has already left the firm hasnt he?

 

[DreamyChick]

Yes. His last day was Friday.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

Originally posted by DreamyChick
Yes. His last day was Friday.

No more novel posts from you. You like him, he likes you, he has a GF (he can't completely go for you), your a girl. You don't know how to deal with a guy that your attracted to ignoring you. If he has the balls, he will contact you oin the future for some side pusse or a relationship.

Now go read cosmo--- just kidding :cheer: