Avoiding pursuit burnout?

[Firefly]

I am involved in organising events for exchange students at my university.

This gives me a chance to meet a lot of exchange students who are out for a good time, and has lead to me hooking up with a few, include a HB8.5 from California last weekend after I took her to a concert I had free tickets to.

The problem is that I also spend a lot of time feeling taken for granted/passed over/used. The girls in the exchange program tend to not only be hot, but academically successful (the exchange program at my university is one of the most difficult to get into) and from wealthy backgrounds (studying overseas for six months aint cheap!). This means many of them have a strong sense of entitlement. As a result, I will get a lot of these girls taking the stuff I do for granted, being abusive if I run out of tickets for events, ignoring social invitations after I have given them several tickets to events etc. (Interestingly, the male students tend to be very appreciative and often tell me how they appreciate having someone who organizes stuff like this for them while they are here).

I realise that I should focus on the fact that I am lucky to be hooking up with a couple of co-eds a year in my late thirties, but I am still finding it hard to deal with the constant brush-offs that I need to go through to meet the few girls who are interested. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to not let the actions of the uninterested girls get to me? Or do people think I should just give up on the whole thing?

 

[3countriesPlan]

Don't give up on your goals, just think of it as a way to toughen yourself up, the truth is, alot of those exchange girls are going to be stuck up and prissy, and probably come from a society or country where tricking is the NORM. Therefore you are going to get stomped on by many of them because they are spoiled and see you purely for your value to them at the moment and nothing more.

Keep up with your efforts and believe in yourself. You'll get some play, its just you are working on a comparatively low quality pool of girls so there will be more work required to close.

 

[Die Hard]

Display higher value... But don't just display it, you need to FEEL it and BELIEVE it. You are the prize!

I realise that I should focus on the fact that I am lucky to be hooking up with a couple of co-eds a year in my late thirties

No! As you think, you shall become... Which means you better start thinking THEY are lucky to hook up with YOU.

 

[L B]

Experience over time will help you increase your success rate, but it's still a numbers game. Good job finding a niche market here. If it works, why stop. Even 1 out of 10 is a good number.

 

[Jeffst1980]

First off, remember that it's a numbers game. It doesn't matter whether any particular woman finds you attractive or not, because there are so many of them. It's almost useless to try to find a "reason" for any individual rejection, because one woman's rejection is nonsensical and has no bearing on the female population as a whole.

The other key point about this is that by doing favors and organizing events for these women, you are supplicating to them--even though it's your job, in this case. Women tend to lose attraction for guys that do things for them, whether it's an orbiter AFC or an employee that works under them. There's really no way around this, and I'm not surprised that these girls are giving you the brush off when you attempt to trade favors for dates.

I would advise that, instead of courting girls with free concert tickets, etc., you simply do your job and allow interested women to reveal themselves (it will be fairly obvious). The more you disqualify yourself to the girls in this program, under the guise of "being professional," the more they will pursue YOU. Your current strategy is likely to result in those negative feelings you described because you are trying too hard.

 

[scrouds]

cut them off.

Make it known, subconsiously, that what you offer comes with strings. If they want to keep the gravy train coming, they need to deliver themselves when you ask.

Also make sure you push-pull. Take a chick out to a ticketed event, then go cold next time and turn your attentions to others.