Attention Wh*res 101

[Yachtie]

So would you say that a "nice" girl who has good to high self-esteem but a fair number of the blue list above is an AW?
A big factor on the blue list, it seems to me, is that they (AWs) take and pull attention and rarely give it. Is that correct? I might also read the description as saying that they give a good amount of attention in hopes that they'll get it back. Curious to hear your thoughts.

 

[seasonedplayer]

An attention ***** is simply a girl with too much self confidence and male attention.

Every girl is an attention ***** to some extent and has the potential to be one in the right circumstances.

These girls are just looking for a man good enough to put them in their place.

Incorrect! An AW is a girl with LOW self esteem; often growing up without a father figure. They are looking for a guy to fill that void. They are dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. As for being able to get them, there is no set strategy - usually if you are unavailable (e.g married) and around them a lot without showing interest in them, they will be interested in you

 

[Acq]

You are very right, here is the thread which brought me here, I dont want it to get bumped, but it shows typical AW behaviour towards an AFC like the old me.

the girl mentioned here had an abusive and absent father like she told me later.

guys, AVOID attention *****s

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=175061

 

[jafyk]

I like this thread but the following are my concerns about it.

1) While informative it is depressing to read, lol. It seems then by the definition of the OP most girls are AWs and also implies that a lot of us guys are looking for the perfect girl (even though this accusation will be denied. Does having the education,money, right social skills, good body and being able to have your picks of the women really mean a guy is a great catch?)

2) Since AWs traits overlap even in what we would consider a non-AW girl. Could you please list traits of a Non-AW women and also expand on how they should act so we have something to compare the AW to in order to see the difference. This is why I say that this is depressing because it just makes it seem like not many women are even worth talking to. It's not always easy to tell right away if a woman is AWs. Taking the time to find out that one is...is just more wasted time. So, please post a comparison in this thread. Thank you.

 

[Igetit!]

I don't understand why everyone is making a big deal out of AWs.

Ease said it best. He said.....

Every girl is an attention ***** to some extent and has the potential to be one in the right circumstances.

EVERY WOMAN IS EVERYTHING. (or at least has the potential to be.)


Under the right circumstances and/or conditions ANY WOMAN can be....

a slvt
a faithful girlfriend or wife
a prude
stuckup or snobbish
an AW



There's NO SUCH THING as a girl who's a 100% attention whore.

90% of the cases I've seen on the forum where a guy was dealing with a girl who was an AW,it was the guy's behavior that brought the Aw out of her.




Three guys can all approach the same girl and get 3 different responses out of her. The same girl who one guy approaches and she acts snobby or stuck up with him,can be approached by another guy and she'll have a one night stand with him.



Then the same girl who was a snob to one guy and had a one night stand with another,will enter into a LTR with yet another guy,and with yet a 4th guy,she'll might try to put him in the friendzone.


EVERY WOMAN IS EVERYTHING. It's just up to YOU to decide which one she's going to be.




The trick to dealing with AWs is easy. You don't have to avoid AWs or withhold attention from them.


All you have to do is interact with them in a way that DOESN'T INFLATE THEIR EGO. That's it. It's not giving them attention that's the problem,it's attention that BOOST THEIR EGOS.




When a guy tells a girl that she's..........
hot or beautiful,when he repeatedly calls her asking for dates or when he can see her after she's flaked a few times,if she sees that you're mad,upset,or angry because of her flaking,it all boosts her ego because she sees that you're EMOTIONALLY INVESTED in her WITHOUT HER DOING ANYTHING..




If she feels she has you won over without having sex with you,giving you a kiss,or even having gone on a single date with you,then of course she's going to be an AW....WITH YOU.



And why not,she's got you acting like a dog standing on it's hind legs begging for a treat not because or anything she's said or done,but simply because she exist.




It's simple,just don't boost her ego. She'll either date you or get lost.

 

[jafyk]

Thank you so much Igetit your explanation here really clarifies things. I don't think a man is totally responsible for a woman's reaction. This school of thought puts pressure on us don't you think? Cos what you are implying is that if a woman met several guy # 2 types as you've described above no matter the space of time in between that she will respond the same way to all? Anyway, what's your insight on this thread I posted?
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=180617

 

[seasonedplayer]

I like this thread but the following are my concerns about it.

1) While informative it is depressing to read, lol. It seems then by the definition of the OP most girls are AWs and also implies that a lot of us guys are looking for the perfect girl (even though this accusation will be denied. Does having the education,money, right social skills, good body and being able to have your picks of the women really mean a guy is a great catch?)

2) Since AWs traits overlap even in what we would consider a non-AW girl. Could you please list traits of a Non-AW women and also expand on how they should act so we have something to compare the AW to in order to see the difference. This is why I say that this is depressing because it just makes it seem like not many women are even worth talking to. It's not always easy to tell right away if a woman is AWs. Taking the time to find out that one is...is just more wasted time. So, please post a comparison in this thread. Thank you.

The problem with being burnt by an attention wh*re is that you suspect normal women of being attention wh*res and become suspicious. Like everything it is a question degree and rather than trying to look for normal girls, look for the attention wh)res. Go back to through threads as far back as 2004, there have been some really good ones detailing the traits to watch out for e.g not having a fatherly figure, lots of male friends, lack of good looking female friends, always making excuses, excessive makeup etc

 

[seasonedplayer]

I like this thread but the following are my concerns about it.

1) While informative it is depressing to read, lol. It seems then by the definition of the OP most girls are AWs and also implies that a lot of us guys are looking for the perfect girl (even though this accusation will be denied. Does having the education,money, right social skills, good body and being able to have your picks of the women really mean a guy is a great catch?)

2) Since AWs traits overlap even in what we would consider a non-AW girl. Could you please list traits of a Non-AW women and also expand on how they should act so we have something to compare the AW to in order to see the difference. This is why I say that this is depressing because it just makes it seem like not many women are even worth talking to. It's not always easy to tell right away if a woman is AWs. Taking the time to find out that one is...is just more wasted time. So, please post a comparison in this thread. Thank you.

The problem with being burnt by an attention wh*re is that you suspect normal women of being attention wh*res and become suspicious. Like everything it is a question degree and rather than trying to look for normal girls, look for the attention wh)res. Go back to through threads as far back as 2004, there have been some really good ones detailing the traits to watch out for e.g not having a fatherly figure, lots of male friends, lack of good looking female friends, always making excuses, excessive makeup etc

 

[seasonedplayer]

Here is a DJ bible for attention wh*res

 

[seasonedplayer]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=55343

 

[jafyk]

Seasoned Player where's the link? Oh never mind it just showed up now.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Knowledge is power, the best antidote

I disagree with some statements, I don´t think all girls ca be anything. There are girls who will get annoyed if you pay too much attention to them, while AWs will love all the attention, actually they will find crazy ways of making you pay attention to them (positively or negatively).

I only use the terms AWs, BPDs, whatever, when their behavior is extreme. This is the point. You know, like fear of abandonment, why would a typical girl be afraid of being alone? Why would she need to be surrounded by a bunch of guys all the time? This is not normal, yet, it´s still necessary to see other traits as well.

The difference between medicine and poison is the dosage. I see call such girls poison exactly because they are high dosage.

After reading Emotional Vampires ans DSM-IV (this one for *nerds :crackup I could see beyond the fog these types surround you in order to suck you dry.

 

[PapiChulo]

Every girl is an attention ***** to some extent and has the potential to be one in the right circumstances.

That's a pluralistic answer.


Every person acts in such manner because of their nature (including emotions) or upbringing -they can not help themselves.The rest simply chose to act a certain way on the rational bases and they do know that they are cruel.

Then, trying to tame the AW doesn't work, you cant really be the right man to handle them unless you are a pushover daddy-type actually in a relationship with them. They want to conquer you not the other way around. She will run to you if you show a complete disinterest in her. Whatever you do here, she will still cut you out of her life if you are not Mr. Right. She already knows whether you are the one right from the beginning.

 

[jafyk]

post a link to this dsm-4 stuff you keep talking about.
@Papichulo: Now you are making this sound really like some horrow movie, lol. Not sure if I can walk the streets tomorrow. Don't wanna get caught up in an AW.

 

[PapiChulo]

I disagree with some statements, I don´t think all girls ca be anything. There are girls who will get annoyed if you pay too much attention to them, while AWs will love all the attention, actually they will find crazy ways of making you pay attention to them (positively or negatively).

I only use the terms AWs, BPDs, whatever, when their behavior is extreme. This is the point. You know, like fear of abandonment, why would a typical girl be afraid of being alone? Why would she need to be surrounded by a bunch of guys all the time? This is not normal, yet, it´s still necessary to see other traits as well.

The difference between medicine and poison is the dosage. I see call such girls poison exactly because they are high dosage.

After reading Emotional Vampires ans DSM-IV (this one for *nerds :crackup I could see beyond the fog these types surround you in order to suck you dry.

very much agree with the above. I ve made that point in the original post and most of the readers seem to have ignored it completely.

 

[Igetit!]

I don't think a man is totally responsible for a woman's reaction.

I agree. We're not,but we have a lot more of an influence on how women respond to us than you think.

This school of thought puts pressure on us don't you think?

How so? Because to me,this is GOOD NEWS.


If I know that behavior A will get one response out of a girl,while behavior B will get another,then that means that to an extend,I can choose what kind of reaction I'll get out of her.


It doesn't guarantee you a date,but it at least gets you headed in that direction.



Who here on this forum will disagree with me on saying that putting a woman on a pedistal is a bad idea? Well if we all know that doing that will be a turn off and I choose to go a different direction,then to a degree,I have already headed off the female behaviors that go along with a woman being pedistaled.



As previously stated,we (men) ARE NOT responsible for how women respond to us,but WE DO have more of an impact than a lot of guys realize.

Cos what you are implying is that if a woman met several guy # 2 types as you've described above no matter the space of time in between that she will respond the same way to all?

That's EXACTLY what I'm implying.


If three guys,all clingy,whiny,annoying afc types all approach the same girl with the same behaviors,chances are,she'll react the same way to all three reguardless of how much time passes between each approach.

Anyway, what's your insight on this thread I posted?
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=180617

I had a look at the thread. You asked what we think that this girl may want from you,but my question would be,what do YOU want from her?


That's what I meant about the behavior a guy shows towards a girl......what do YOU WANT from her? You asked her for her number and she said she didn't feel comfortable giving it out. Then you reacted as if you just threw in the towel and decided to get in the friendzone with her or something.


Instead of giving up (if you did),you should have made her feel comfortable enough to give it to you. I mean she did call you cute,right?
You think she said that for nothing?


I think she may have had some interest at one point,but the way you two speak now,it's friendzonish. So as far as what it is she may want from you,it's probably just someone she can talk to about her boyfriend problems and whatever other issue she may have.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

"Igetit!" I mostly agree with you but remember the tale of the frog and the scorpion?? Its nature does not change because of the frog´s attitude. The scorpion may disguise its intentions but sooner or later...

Besides everything else, understand you own nature as well as the "enemy". You know, just in case you need to push the EJECT button before being stung. The poor frog didn´t see it coming, poor afc.

"If you do not know your enemies but do know yourself, you will win one and lose one; if you do not know your enemies nor yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle. However, if you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles." - The Art of War, Sun Tzu

 

[jafyk]

I agree. We're not,but we have a lot more of an influence on how women respond to us than you think.



How so? Because to me,this is GOOD NEWS.


If I know that behavior A will get one response out of a girl,while behavior B will get another,then that means that to an extend,I can choose what kind of reaction I'll get out of her.


It doesn't guarantee you a date,but it at least gets you headed in that direction.



Who here on this forum will disagree with me on saying that putting a woman on a pedistal is a bad idea? Well if we all know that doing that will be a turn off and I choose to go a different direction,then to a degree,I have already headed off the female behaviors that go along with a woman being pedistaled.



As previously stated,we (men) ARE NOT responsible for how women respond to us,but WE DO have more of an impact than a lot of guys realize.






That's EXACTLY what I'm implying.


If three guys,all clingy,whiny,annoying afc types all approach the same girl with the same behaviors,chances are,she'll react the same way to all three reguardless of how much time passes between each approach.





I had a look at the thread. You asked what we think that this girl may want from you,but my question would be,what do YOU want from her?

That's what I meant about the behavior a guy shows towards a girl......what do YOU WANT from her? You asked her for her number and she said she didn't feel comfortable giving it out. Then you reacted as if you just threw in the towel and decided to get in the friendzone with her or something.


Instead of giving up (if you did),you should have made her feel comfortable enough to give it to you. I mean she did call you cute,right?
You think she said that for nothing?


I think she may have had some interest at one point,but the way you two speak now,it's friendzonish. So as far as what it is she may want from you,it's probably just someone she can talk to about her boyfriend problems and whatever other issue she may have.

Ok, It would've been better if you had responded to this in that thread so that this thread doesn't feel like it's being hijacked and so that the thoughts would make more sense.
Well, If I'm to be honest if I had the chance to do her I would but I haven't made up my mind. She came to to begin with so, the way I see it if I find out what she wants then I can decide if I want to give it to her.
The thing about her phone # I figured she either wanted to get to know me first. So, i didn't push it or that maybe she has something to hide or wants something from me. As I type this she's IMing me and she initiated it and she hasn't complained about her BF although she did make a joke that got me going"hmmm" I told her I'd have to start charging her for my time and she said she's willing to pay with her BF's card and it will be like her BF paying me to stimulate her. So, I don't know if there's a diss in there and she asked me what I think about her and then went specifically to ask about her looks. I told her other qualities i liked about her and told her I'd have to form a panel to decide on the looks thing. I know there's a trap in there but I don't know how to avoid it lol.
Anyway, I've never met this girl before so I don't really care so it's not like I have anything to lose. I just wanted to know if this is an AW situation or if she's looking for something else.

 

[JustLurk]

post a link to this dsm-4 stuff you keep talking about.
@Papichulo: Now you are making this sound really like some horrow movie, lol. Not sure if I can walk the streets tomorrow. Don't wanna get caught up in an AW.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diagnostic_and_Statistical_Manual_of_Mental_Disorders
Apologies if someone already posted this. I have a copy but couldn't find an online one. (I didn't look too hard.) It's almost certainly online if you bother to google it.