Señor Fingers
Master Don Juan
I have been frequenting the same clubs and bars over the last year and I notice an interesting pattern going on. The regulars not only hang out with the same group of buddies, but often chill in the SAME SPOT every week! I swear, its like some territorial Discovery Channel sh!t.
I realize that I used to do the very same thing before I started getting into seduction. My friends and I would show up to the bar and hover around “our spot” until whoever was there caught our vibe and left. We would then proceed to swoop in like vultures and hold that sh!t down like Fort Knox all night long. Anyone who tried to steal a seat or muscle in would catch the evil eye and be sent on his way.
Funny how things change…
These days I am the intruder! That proverbial butterfly who lands on different social circles, often merging them together like the radiating ripples of a placid lake.
It is fascinating because I have managed to build lasting friendships and permanently alter the social structure here just by crashing in on sets and introducing people to each other. Hell, a couple of romances have blossomed from my constant meddling. It sure is fun to prod people out of their shells!
After months of this behavior, I have managed to pick up a valuable social skill that I havent noticed until now.
DIPLOMACY
What exactly is diplomacy?
Quite simple actually. Think of diplomats. They are multi-lingual wonders who represent their countries on the international stage and transcend cultural boundaries to form a common understanding. These folks are masters of communication! They are also masters of objectivity, suspending their own judgements and relating to both sides of an argument in order to form compromises and diffuse conflicts. Powerful stuff!
Now think about how you relate to different types of people. Your friends see a different side of you than your boss or family does, right? I mean, when was the last time you rolled up to the lady at Starbucks and said…
“Yo beeyatch, lemme git wunnadoze slammin dubble-lahtay joints. Thas like two-fitty right? Word to ya moms, deez fukkin lahtay sh!tz is off the chilzznain! Wooooot!!”
Of course not. If you become aware of your own behavior you will see that you are constantly shifting gears, modifying your speech and manner of relating to others. This is a crude form of diplomacy that most people are capable of.
If you want to hone this skill however, you must learn how to SIMULTANEOUSLY handle different vibes and still maintain your integrity and presence. You do this by fostering a real understanding and intuition about people.
For instance, some folks you meet will have a dry sense of humor, others are goofy and some are downright morbid, but they are all still people with common wants and needs that you can respond to.
The best way to understand these commonalities is to expose yourself to as many people as possible. By constantly working that social radar, you will start to pick up little intuitions about people based on certain clues (we will cover these later on). In time you will learn what makes people tick and you can use this knowledge to your advantage.
CHECKMATE!
Once you develop an understanding of others, the scene becomes a big social game of chess. Everyone is playing their roles as pawns, rooks, knights and what-have-you. But you are the ChessMaster! You have a good idea of what maneuvers each piece is capable of and how it will interact with the other pieces.
You start out by opening a group of friends.
Wait..you DO know how to open ..right?
For those who are clueless check out these threads to warm your skills up.
Destroying Social Phobias
Freestyling Street Approaches
Okay now that you are IN, get them talking for a bit and then politely eject and move on to another group. Keep doing short sets like this and eventually you will build up these small impressions of everyone in the game. At this point you can start pushing groups together, merging convos, disrupting the cliques and taking charge of the scene.
You can even pawn the so-so girls up for the hotter ones. Just the other night I was getting a number from some random chick and this other girl, who was much hotter, approached and opened me! I also used this technique to get the number of this hot bartender, a pretty young thang who had always ignored me in the past. It really doesnt surprise me though. Ever notice how you get more girls staring you down when you already have a girlfriend? Same thing, except this time you are free!
You may not get results instantly, but it is a scientific fact that humans are social animals, so keep in mind that this skill is in your genes and only takes the slightest push to get your game in gear.
As you improve your skills, don’t be surprised if at the end of the night, you find yourself in the company of rastas, goths, freaks, squares, etc. all having a convo together. Hehe… good times!
Your social proof goes through the roof when you pull off sh!t like this, and believe me, the ladies notice!
On a personal note, this really isnt even my main goal when I am crashing sets like this. In all honesty, my adventures have made me realize something about myself…
I truly love people!
Its funny because in a sense I have developed a raging case of
ALL-ITIS
Wha?
Yup. I just coined my first term. Like it?
Obviously it is the polar opposite of one-itis, but what exactly is it and how do you develop it?
Well for starters, I want you to tap into your childlike curiosity about the world. Be observant and take a sincere interest in others. Once you really learn to read people, you will discover reflections of yourself in them and unlock the power of empathy, an emotional force that brings folks together and forges magnetic connections. More on this in a bit…
Here is a visualization exercise I invented to help you “fall for all”. (At least I am pretty sure I invented it)
The next time you meet someone, I want you to become insatiably curious about them without asking any questions. Here´s how…
Try to imagine them as a mere infant, defenseless and vulnerable in the arms of a loving mother. Awww, they´re so cute! Now, fast-forward through time and watch them grow. Imagine the way their life has played out up until that moment. The awkwardness of puberty, the heartbreaks, the victories and defeats, the tears and laughter, the people they loved/hated. Let yourself become endeared to this person as you weave a tale of their lives based on your gut impression of them.
Note: Obviously this is not something you do to everyone you meet, that would be emotionally exhausting! Just pick someone you find interesting and think of this as a simple exercise to help develop your social intuition.
GATHERING CLUES
There are all sorts of questions you can ask yourself to draw these conclusions. What does their body language tell you? How do they relate to others? How do they speak? At what speed do they move through life? What makes them laugh? What kind of clothes are they wearing? Most importantly, what do you see in their eyes? What is their vibe? Joy? Pain? Humor? Sadness? Longing?
Don’t just use your eyes and ears either. Really step into their shoes and FEEL this person out. This is not to be confused with mirroring. You are simply observing and tuning into the vibes of empathy. It is a skill that we all possess, though few of us use.
Sometimes it´s fun to feed people your impression of them after you have warmed them up a bit. Humans are naturally vain creatures and LOVE to hear what sort of impression they make! Just be sure you are prepared to back up your perception with what you have observed.
Once you start to develop this affinity for others and hone your observational skills, you will be well on your way to realizing…
THE SOCIAL GOD WITHIN
One of the greatest things about all-itis is that you are free from one-itis forever! Your love and energy is spread around instead of invested into one person (who can really handle all that pressure and responsibility anyway?) I highly recommend this mind state as it can create new worlds of possibilities and helps to eliminate that pesky desperation.
Another wonderful advantage is that by fostering this love for all, you will continually expand your social network and become instantly proofed. Your friends will give you the warmest introductions so that by the time you actually open your mouth to speak, just about any hottie in question is already feelin you on some level.
The very best part of all-itis is that the universe has a funny way of giving you exactly what you put out. Spread good vibes always and see what a difference it makes in your reality!
This doesn’t just apply to seduction. The ability to connect with others and expand your personal network will have a profound effect on all areas of your life. Sometimes all it takes is a chance meeting with that one key person who will set the wheels of your destiny in motion and manifest your wildest dreams into reality.
So do yourself a favor. Shut down this silly machine of yours and get out there! In a world of isolated souls, amidst the darkness of billions of inhibitions, SOMEBODY has to shine … may as well be you!
As always, you can count on me to be silently rooting for you from afar…
Peace, Blessings and Much Love,
FINGZ
I realize that I used to do the very same thing before I started getting into seduction. My friends and I would show up to the bar and hover around “our spot” until whoever was there caught our vibe and left. We would then proceed to swoop in like vultures and hold that sh!t down like Fort Knox all night long. Anyone who tried to steal a seat or muscle in would catch the evil eye and be sent on his way.
Funny how things change…
These days I am the intruder! That proverbial butterfly who lands on different social circles, often merging them together like the radiating ripples of a placid lake.
It is fascinating because I have managed to build lasting friendships and permanently alter the social structure here just by crashing in on sets and introducing people to each other. Hell, a couple of romances have blossomed from my constant meddling. It sure is fun to prod people out of their shells!
After months of this behavior, I have managed to pick up a valuable social skill that I havent noticed until now.
DIPLOMACY
What exactly is diplomacy?
Quite simple actually. Think of diplomats. They are multi-lingual wonders who represent their countries on the international stage and transcend cultural boundaries to form a common understanding. These folks are masters of communication! They are also masters of objectivity, suspending their own judgements and relating to both sides of an argument in order to form compromises and diffuse conflicts. Powerful stuff!
Now think about how you relate to different types of people. Your friends see a different side of you than your boss or family does, right? I mean, when was the last time you rolled up to the lady at Starbucks and said…
“Yo beeyatch, lemme git wunnadoze slammin dubble-lahtay joints. Thas like two-fitty right? Word to ya moms, deez fukkin lahtay sh!tz is off the chilzznain! Wooooot!!”
Of course not. If you become aware of your own behavior you will see that you are constantly shifting gears, modifying your speech and manner of relating to others. This is a crude form of diplomacy that most people are capable of.
If you want to hone this skill however, you must learn how to SIMULTANEOUSLY handle different vibes and still maintain your integrity and presence. You do this by fostering a real understanding and intuition about people.
For instance, some folks you meet will have a dry sense of humor, others are goofy and some are downright morbid, but they are all still people with common wants and needs that you can respond to.
The best way to understand these commonalities is to expose yourself to as many people as possible. By constantly working that social radar, you will start to pick up little intuitions about people based on certain clues (we will cover these later on). In time you will learn what makes people tick and you can use this knowledge to your advantage.
CHECKMATE!
Once you develop an understanding of others, the scene becomes a big social game of chess. Everyone is playing their roles as pawns, rooks, knights and what-have-you. But you are the ChessMaster! You have a good idea of what maneuvers each piece is capable of and how it will interact with the other pieces.
You start out by opening a group of friends.
Wait..you DO know how to open ..right?
For those who are clueless check out these threads to warm your skills up.
Destroying Social Phobias
Freestyling Street Approaches
Okay now that you are IN, get them talking for a bit and then politely eject and move on to another group. Keep doing short sets like this and eventually you will build up these small impressions of everyone in the game. At this point you can start pushing groups together, merging convos, disrupting the cliques and taking charge of the scene.
You can even pawn the so-so girls up for the hotter ones. Just the other night I was getting a number from some random chick and this other girl, who was much hotter, approached and opened me! I also used this technique to get the number of this hot bartender, a pretty young thang who had always ignored me in the past. It really doesnt surprise me though. Ever notice how you get more girls staring you down when you already have a girlfriend? Same thing, except this time you are free!
You may not get results instantly, but it is a scientific fact that humans are social animals, so keep in mind that this skill is in your genes and only takes the slightest push to get your game in gear.
As you improve your skills, don’t be surprised if at the end of the night, you find yourself in the company of rastas, goths, freaks, squares, etc. all having a convo together. Hehe… good times!
Your social proof goes through the roof when you pull off sh!t like this, and believe me, the ladies notice!
On a personal note, this really isnt even my main goal when I am crashing sets like this. In all honesty, my adventures have made me realize something about myself…
I truly love people!
Its funny because in a sense I have developed a raging case of
ALL-ITIS
Wha?
Yup. I just coined my first term. Like it?
Obviously it is the polar opposite of one-itis, but what exactly is it and how do you develop it?
Well for starters, I want you to tap into your childlike curiosity about the world. Be observant and take a sincere interest in others. Once you really learn to read people, you will discover reflections of yourself in them and unlock the power of empathy, an emotional force that brings folks together and forges magnetic connections. More on this in a bit…
Here is a visualization exercise I invented to help you “fall for all”. (At least I am pretty sure I invented it)
The next time you meet someone, I want you to become insatiably curious about them without asking any questions. Here´s how…
Try to imagine them as a mere infant, defenseless and vulnerable in the arms of a loving mother. Awww, they´re so cute! Now, fast-forward through time and watch them grow. Imagine the way their life has played out up until that moment. The awkwardness of puberty, the heartbreaks, the victories and defeats, the tears and laughter, the people they loved/hated. Let yourself become endeared to this person as you weave a tale of their lives based on your gut impression of them.
Note: Obviously this is not something you do to everyone you meet, that would be emotionally exhausting! Just pick someone you find interesting and think of this as a simple exercise to help develop your social intuition.
GATHERING CLUES
There are all sorts of questions you can ask yourself to draw these conclusions. What does their body language tell you? How do they relate to others? How do they speak? At what speed do they move through life? What makes them laugh? What kind of clothes are they wearing? Most importantly, what do you see in their eyes? What is their vibe? Joy? Pain? Humor? Sadness? Longing?
Don’t just use your eyes and ears either. Really step into their shoes and FEEL this person out. This is not to be confused with mirroring. You are simply observing and tuning into the vibes of empathy. It is a skill that we all possess, though few of us use.
Sometimes it´s fun to feed people your impression of them after you have warmed them up a bit. Humans are naturally vain creatures and LOVE to hear what sort of impression they make! Just be sure you are prepared to back up your perception with what you have observed.
Once you start to develop this affinity for others and hone your observational skills, you will be well on your way to realizing…
THE SOCIAL GOD WITHIN
One of the greatest things about all-itis is that you are free from one-itis forever! Your love and energy is spread around instead of invested into one person (who can really handle all that pressure and responsibility anyway?) I highly recommend this mind state as it can create new worlds of possibilities and helps to eliminate that pesky desperation.
Another wonderful advantage is that by fostering this love for all, you will continually expand your social network and become instantly proofed. Your friends will give you the warmest introductions so that by the time you actually open your mouth to speak, just about any hottie in question is already feelin you on some level.
The very best part of all-itis is that the universe has a funny way of giving you exactly what you put out. Spread good vibes always and see what a difference it makes in your reality!
This doesn’t just apply to seduction. The ability to connect with others and expand your personal network will have a profound effect on all areas of your life. Sometimes all it takes is a chance meeting with that one key person who will set the wheels of your destiny in motion and manifest your wildest dreams into reality.
So do yourself a favor. Shut down this silly machine of yours and get out there! In a world of isolated souls, amidst the darkness of billions of inhibitions, SOMEBODY has to shine … may as well be you!
As always, you can count on me to be silently rooting for you from afar…
Peace, Blessings and Much Love,
FINGZ
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