At 36 all I want is......

[Yo'Mama]

to party all the time and go through as many women as I can.

A bit of background. I qualified as a doctor (got no action at university). Decided it wasn't for me and trained as a lawyer, which I am now. Was in an LTR for most of my twenties.

I've made cash and am making more cash but my work bores me. It's ok sometimes I guess, I can get involved in figuring stuff out, advising, etc.

Writing is a passion, I love music and feel a deep connection with it, as well as films. I'm well read, etc. I'm an introvert.

But I'm going through this weird phase where all I can think about it getting smashed and trying to sleep with as many women as possible. I don't know if this is a midlife crisis or what but this is the mentality of a 21 year old isn't it? In fact I get on better with 21 year old girls because they just want to party and have fun.

I have NO desire to settle down and have kids.

I just wanted to know if any of you mature men felt like this. Please no flaming, seriously I'm not advocating this lifestyle or saying it's not 'sad'. I'm just saying how I feel and want to know if this is just me or not. I don't know if it's just a phase but it's kind of all consuming at the moment.

 

[GotED?]

You are probably just making up for the time you didn't have to enjoy exploring women and life in your 20's.

I was married and with someone for almost 10 years late 20's to late 30's. It took me a few years to adapt post-divorce, but now I am having the best time of my life with women at 41 yrs old.

I can't relate to your question, as I have been married before (and don't feel like going through the marriage grinder again). However there's correlation to having been tied up for a decade in LTR/marriage and having the freedom to rule the world with women like you never have before.

I was very naive for most of my life (total AFC), I am just now realizing the power I have over women (late developer/bloomer). Although I don't party like you do and only do LTR-potential dating with women (not sleeping with as many as possible), there's nothing wrong with each person's 'preferences'in life as we are all different and unique to our own selves.

Enjoy your time in life - if it makes you happy then that is what is important in the NOW for you.


Be well

Exodus

 

[Yo'Mama]

You are probably just making up for the time you didn't have to enjoy exploring women and life in your 20's.

I was married and with someone for almost 10 years late 20's to late 30's. It took me a few years to adapt post-divorce, but now I am having the best time of my life with women at 41 yrs old.

I can't relate to your question, as I have been married before (and don't feel like going through the marriage grinder again). However there's correlation to having been tied up for a decade in LTR/marriage and having the freedom to rule the world with women like you never have before.

I was very naive for most of my life (total AFC), I am just now realizing the power I have over women (late developer/bloomer). Although I don't party like you do and only do LTR-potential dating with women (not sleeping with as many as possible), there's nothing wrong with each person's 'preferences'in life as we are all different and unique to our own selves.

Enjoy your time in life - if it makes you happy then that is what is important in the NOW for you.


Be well

Exodus

Cheers Exodus, I always value your posts and am always particularly receptive to posters a couple of years older and wiser than me.

I can't explain it, it's crazy. I just want to pack everything into the here and now. My friends are planning for their future, buying houses, having babies, obsessing about which schools they will go to, what catchment areas to live in, etc. I'm not a shallow guy but everything I want at the moment is hedonistic. You're probably right about making up for lost time.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I can't explain it, it's crazy. I just want to pack everything into the here and now. My friends are planning for their future, buying houses, having babies, obsessing about which schools they will go to, what catchment areas to live in, etc. I'm not a shallow guy but everything I want at the moment is hedonistic. You're probably right about making up for lost time.

The biggest thing I've found is that if you break off from the 'path' in life, that society preaches, you have to be content with not caring what others think.

Be true to yourself the whole time.

I can relate, I don't want to get married, buy a house, and have kids. It's not for me either. It doesn't mean we are shallow or selfish in any way.

Furthermore, there's tons of women out there that are the same way. I think the whole sex in the city freedom loving feminists kind of shot themselves in the foot that way....they actually freed us instead.

What I do is enjoy my life and hobbies, and I only allow women into my life who enjoy those hobbies themselves. Life is good.

 

[Yo'Mama]

Amen!!!

I"m embracing it more and more. For a long time I felt almost guilty about it because of the way society (and my friends and girlfriends) shame guys for it.

I read this book called 'How I found freedom in an unfree world'. It's changed the way I think.

I'm looking forward to the next decade. In my LTR I felt so trapped and like there was nothing to look forward to. The companionship was nice but I need fun.

My hobbies are really writing and working out. I'd love to find a girl that I could bounce story ideas off and who was up for running, gym, etc.

Thanks guys. I love this forum sometimes.

 

[VladPatton]

I feel the same and am not sorry for it.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Yo Mama,
When you work out how to sort your (Problem?)out,please let me know,it is high time that I turned over a new leaf...Well perhaps next week LOL!

 

[Colossus]

I dont really understand this. Not knocking you....I guess for me personally I just know there is no pot of gold at the end of the pvssy rainbow.

I do daydream about new as$ from time to time, but overall I am 10x happier in a positive relationship than I ever was as a single guy nailing new girls. I had a lot of fun, learned some really critical lessons; but being single is a lot of highs and lows. In an LTR you dont really have those soaring highs once you settle in, but you also don't have those grinding lows (if it's a good one). It's a trade off of sorts.

I think I just got it out of my system. I reflect on it sometimes but I have no desire to go back to that lifestyle at this point in my life. New pvssy is fun but offers no substantial fulfillment to me.

 

[CrimsonPanther]

I dont really understand this. Not knocking you....I guess for me personally I just know there is no pot of gold at the end of the pvssy rainbow.

some people aren't aiming at a pot o' gold, they just enjoy riding the rainbow

 

[Colossus]

The same could be said for LTRs, after all - there will be no single day where everything suddenly clicks into place and you think, "Now I'm happy." There will always be some challenge or new frontier. In fact, in general we should remember that happiness isn't a state that we one day achieve and lock into place. It's part enjoying pursuit, part enjoying what you've got.

It really is. There is never a point of "arrival". Always a new challenge, hurdle, or problem.

Like i said, nothing against a player lifestyle, just not appealing to me. Most women are so fvcking annoying that I'm good with one!! Haha

 

[GotED?]

Like i said, nothing against a player lifestyle, just not appealing to me. Most women are so fvcking annoying that I'm good with one!! Haha

I feel the same way - must be getting FVCKEN OLD too here.

Too much work, women. Find a good quality one and then I am done lookin'.

Exodus

 

[zekko]

You are probably just making up for the time you didn't have to enjoy exploring women and life in your 20's.

I agree with this. I've known a number of guys who didn't party and fool around when they were younger. And as a result they ended up doing it later in life, like they were always trying to chase those younger days that they missed out on. That's probably part of what the OP is going through.

I say go have fun, Yo'Mama, but don't get too carried away with the getting smashed bit. If you end up getting in legal trouble, a judge would probably expect a guy your age to know better. So drink responsibly or whatever.

Too much work, women. Find a good quality one and then I am done lookin'.

Yeah, I mean it may be lazy, but I feel like if I find a good quality woman, great, toss her in the back, that's handled, now I can go focus on other things. Women can be fun, but they can also be annoying, as Colossus noted. I'm not really into making them my 24 hour a day thing. Especially after reading all the dating nightmare stuff on this site.

 

[Yo'Mama]

Interesting replies guys. I can certainly understand those of you who prefer LTRS. I was in one for a long time, I felt much calmer but also trapped and caged.

I don't know what it is, I just have this manic need to chase ass, get f**ked up and stuff at the moment. It might not be about the women but just feeling so irritated and bored by being surrounded by lawyers and bankers all day, all of them talking about the same sh*t, smug, middle class contented robots.

It's like I've got a pathological need to break free of this, even if it involves self destruction. And I'm a guy who has been eating right and exercising a lot for the last few years. It's weird and it's not healthy but like I said, that's just the way I'm feeling. Could be deep seated unhappinness, existential angst, craving for adventure, who knows?

And it's also like all my ambition is gone. I've never been poor so I can't really appreciate what it's like to be so. I can eat wherever I want to, stay at the hotels I want to, I don't have a wife and kids so I have no mouths to feed. It's great in one way but in another way it leaves me purposeless. On the other hand I have no desire for a wife or kids.

Does any of this make sense or is it incoherent?

 

[DonGorgon]

me too... do it as long as you can .. i still F and date 19 to 24 year olds lol and i will until i can't

 

[El Don]

Was just thinking about this very thing for the last several days OP. I'm 28 and was unsuccessful with girls through high school and college. Never had a LTR. I met a girl recently who is 19 and I think one of the reasons pursuing anything more is my age. It really bugged me that even now I'm at a point where even younger girls might not like my age.

My friends always did very well with women so I was always very jealous of them. They are starting to settle down now also (getting married and having LTRs). I feel the same as you now except that I realized I have missed out on so many experiences from earlier on. It's hard for me to get out also with my friends not living nearby and not really in that phase anymore.

 

[guru1000]

A man who follows the herd is a slave, a servant, a prisoner to social conventions. You are emancipated; enjoy! This concept applies in every facet of life.

 

[Yo'Mama]

That's what I love about this forum. It's therapeutic. It's just good to know there are others around me who feel like this, because I don't see it much, if at all, in my daily life.

I've given the marriage and kids thing a lot of thought just because people expect you to do it and will go on about how good it is but I'm pretty sure it's not for me. And I'm not willing to get hitched and have a kid, just to make sure it's not.

Dating so much at the moment. I've met a couple of stunners, a fair few decent but nothing special girls, one or two ugly/weird girls and some younger girls. So far kiss closes galore but nothing further. Am hoping this will change. it's like you'll date maybe eight girls. Five will go nowhere and out of the three you may end up boning a couple. At least that seems to be the direction things are heading in for me.

But everything I've been doing is online. It's lazy I know. I see so many hot women around me on the streets of London but I've never daygamed in my life (ok, once in Japan and it worked). I know daygame is probably the way forward but there's a psychological barrier that I can't seem to cross just yet.) Bars and clubs are unappealing for many reasons that have been discussed ad nauseam on this forum.

At the moment I'm just figuring out how to live this lifestyle. Everything is out of whack at the moment and I'm tired and frazzled. Can't believe the rigamarole we have to go through just to get sex. I'd never want to be gay but at least those guys have no such problems.

 

[SteR]

That's what I love about this forum. It's therapeutic. It's just good to know there are others around me who feel like this, because I don't see it much, if at all, in my daily life.

I've given the marriage and kids thing a lot of thought just because people expect you to do it and will go on about how good it is but I'm pretty sure it's not for me. And I'm not willing to get hitched and have a kid, just to make sure it's not.

Dating so much at the moment. I've met a couple of stunners, a fair few decent but nothing special girls, one or two ugly/weird girls and some younger girls. So far kiss closes galore but nothing further. Am hoping this will change. it's like you'll date maybe eight girls. Five will go nowhere and out of the three you may end up boning a couple. At least that seems to be the direction things are heading in for me.

But everything I've been doing is online. It's lazy I know. I see so many hot women around me on the streets of London but I've never daygamed in my life (ok, once in Japan and it worked). I know daygame is probably the way forward but there's a psychological barrier that I can't seem to cross just yet.) Bars and clubs are unappealing for many reasons that have been discussed ad nauseam on this forum.

At the moment I'm just figuring out how to live this lifestyle. Everything is out of whack at the moment and I'm tired and frazzled. Can't believe the rigamarole we have to go through just to get sex. I'd never want to be gay but at least those guys have no such problems.

Personally I don't think day gaming works that well in London. I mean it definitely can be done but people generally aren't as receptive to it as, say, the US (at least that's what I've noticed anyway). Girls definitely have their defences up a lot more over here..

 

[HoneyHitter]

After I turned 25, the friends and people I hang out with started being younger than myself. Not by design, but mostly because most guys I chilled with got married and stopped doing the activities that bonded us. I just turned 33, and yet younger guys and girls still think I'm 25. Of course, this won't last forever but it's a good advantage and I will take every opportunity to capitalize on it.

 

[Yo'Mama]

After I turned 25, the friends and people I hang out with started being younger than myself. Not by design, but mostly because most guys I chilled with got married and stopped doing the activities that bonded us. I just turned 33, and yet younger guys and girls still think I'm 25. Of course, this won't last forever but it's a good advantage and I will take every opportunity to capitalize on it.

Yeah, you're lucky. I look young too EXCEPT some grey hair. If I dyed it I'd look 29 but I made a thread on here and advice was generally against it. I still might try it once though. Ironically I'm finding it easier to talk to the younger girls. The wanna get married and have kids women have nothing in common with me. My friends who have kids might as well not be friends anymore. It sounds harsh but I've no interest in hearing or seeing Facebook posts about some sh*t their kid took or it with fvcking food all over its mouth and a million comments saying how cute it is.