Asking a girl out

[RecoveringAFC]

Ok weak title I know...

I belong to a Toastmasters club. For those who know toastmasters I'm in the division executive. That makes me a person Toastmasters in the area look up to and respect. People join to improve their communication and leadership skills.

There is a girl I would like to ask out. She's in my home club. She's a bit younger, single and attractive. What's the best way to ask her out so that if she's not interested we avoid a big awkward moment from now on. I want to avoid her being so uncomfortable that she quits. I've seen it before and that's just a bad scene all around.

I'm thinking the direct approach but would like to hear other opinions.

 

[JimmyBizzle]

I don't honestly know what a "Toastmasters club" is, but in any case I would say just throw something out there that's a smaller engagement for the club that would involve a few people to where you could single her out in the evening and concentrate on just you and her, but to where she wouldn't feel obligated to just be with you for the entire night. She would feel like it's her choice, even though YOU'RE the one in control and making it all happen. In this case just show her how confident you are and that you are the best thing for her to be with, if she doesn't realize this I would say move on. This might be kind of extreme, but once again, I don't know what a toastmasters club is, lol.

 

[RecoveringAFC]

Here are two links that might help explain Toastmasters.

Welcome To Toastmasters

Toastmsters.org

The first one is a little cheesy. Doing a Youtube search for Toastmasters gives some better examples.

 

[daygameguy]

Ok weak title I know...

I belong to a Toastmasters club. For those who know toastmasters I'm in the division executive. That makes me a person Toastmasters in the area look up to and respect. People join to improve their communication and leadership skills.

There is a girl I would like to ask out. She's in my home club. She's a bit younger, single and attractive. What's the best way to ask her out so that if she's not interested we avoid a big awkward moment from now on. I want to avoid her being so uncomfortable that she quits. I've seen it before and that's just a bad scene all around.

I'm thinking the direct approach but would like to hear other opinions.

This is called social circle game. She is in your club. Eye contact, friendly attitude, with added playfulness.. as your approach.. use situational.. this is best place to use situational openers.

 

[labyrinth]

Toastmasters has got to be a great place to meet women. I have been thinking about joining the one here in my town. I talked to the lady who is the current President of the local one and she says there are NO dudes in there, and that I would be the first. :cheer:

I'm actually planning to join in order to improve my speaking skills, etc. for teaching. The chicks should be a bonus...unless there all like 70ish. :nervous:

 

[RecoveringAFC]

I've had mixed success with dating in TM. The age range goes from 25-65 quite easily. I have noticed most guys who show up don't go with the idea of gaming on girls. That gives you a nice advantage.

 

[drtk]

Toastmasters has got to be a great place to meet women. I have been thinking about joining the one here in my town. I talked to the lady who is the current President of the local one and she says there are NO dudes in there, and that I would be the first. :cheer:

I'm actually planning to join in order to improve my speaking skills, etc. for teaching. The chicks should be a bonus...unless there all like 70ish. :nervous:

WTF are you waiting for? Do it now!

 

[seagull]

I've had mixed success with dating in TM. The age range goes from 25-65 quite easily. I have noticed most guys who show up don't go with the idea of gaming on girls. That gives you a nice advantage.

Hey RecoveringAFC, I'm sorry to change the subject. But what exactly do they make people do at Toastmasters? I have heard of them before and am aware that it is about improving communication skills. But what do they do exactly? Do you do presentations and speeches? Do they give you a topic to speak on and then you do a presentation or something? How does it work exactly?

You must have good skills at speaking to a crowd if you're in the executive? How long have you been in there for? Has it changed your life/career at all? I have been thinking of joining (not for gaming chicks, but I thought it would be a good career move and benefit me generally).

 

[brian123]

DonS: I like the approach.

How does one demonstrate being light and funny if he does not have much contact with them?

 

[RecoveringAFC]

DonS: Single and attractive not tight little hottie. I see your point. I'll take it slow and keep building value/interest.

SeaGull:
I have been in for 5 years. I wouldn't say I'm particularly great but I can hold my own and have placed in various contests from time to time. It's definitely helped my career. I express ideas well to groups and make presentations as needed. It's given me much needed leadership experience. Something my job hasn't offered until recently.

Has Toastmasters changed my life? Probably. The changes are subtle and gradual. I didn't think I'd be doing the leadership level I am but look what happens....

The best way to know what happens in a Toastmasters meeting is to just go. You don't have to participate and are free to watch. In terms what what we "make" people do...

Each meeting has an agenda. The agenda has various jobs on it from a simple toast up to chairing the whole meeting. These roles are available to any member to take on. This way you can build up your speaking, leadership and communication skills gradually.

There are many speech manuals you can work through. There are also leadership educational sessions and practical exercises you can work through. This is great when a job interview asks: Have you ever led a team? If you've done it in Toastmasters you can now say yes.

If you have general confidence and esteem issues, Toastmasters is a good place to build those up.

This is way way way off topic. If you want to learn more, drop me a note off line.

 

[seagull]

DonS: Single and attractive not tight little hottie. I see your point. I'll take it slow and keep building value/interest.

SeaGull:
I have been in for 5 years. I wouldn't say I'm particularly great but I can hold my own and have placed in various contests from time to time. It's definitely helped my career. I express ideas well to groups and make presentations as needed. It's given me much needed leadership experience. Something my job hasn't offered until recently.

Has Toastmasters changed my life? Probably. The changes are subtle and gradual. I didn't think I'd be doing the leadership level I am but look what happens....

The best way to know what happens in a Toastmasters meeting is to just go. You don't have to participate and are free to watch. In terms what what we "make" people do...

Each meeting has an agenda. The agenda has various jobs on it from a simple toast up to chairing the whole meeting. These roles are available to any member to take on. This way you can build up your speaking, leadership and communication skills gradually.

There are many speech manuals you can work through. There are also leadership educational sessions and practical exercises you can work through. This is great when a job interview asks: Have you ever led a team? If you've done it in Toastmasters you can now say yes.

If you have general confidence and esteem issues, Toastmasters is a good place to build those up.

This is way way way off topic. If you want to learn more, drop me a note off line.

Thank you for your information, RecoveringAFC. I wanted to know how the set up of the meetings worked, and this has really cleared it up. Thanks.