Asked for her #, set a date, offered to reschedule when I confirmed

[SpeedDemon]

Was out with a few people last week and one of the other people's friends was kinda hot, but 25. We melded pretty well and I said we should grab a drink, she suggested next Wed, and texted me her #. It was set for Wed., so I texted tonight to confirm around 8pm and I didn't hear back. I assumed it was DOA, and I just went to 24/7 fitness to exercise. I came back and she texted Hey so and so, I am so sorry, but something came up, but I'd like to see you next Wednesday for drinks. LMK if that works.

I've not responded yet, I was going to in the morning. I was just going to say sure, that's fine. Let's confirm next week.

Good/bad/yes/no?

 

[marmel75]

Its 50/50...she offered to reschedule but why so far out? She have 3 other dates she is scheduled for the meantime?

 

[SpeedDemon]

Not sure. Though, I guess I can go for broke and just hit back what's your weekend look like (or is that too aggressive for a stranger)? I guess my only concern it could get a bit weird if she declines and all of us are meeting up next Monday for, ironically, drinks. She's new to the hang out group, so it's hard to play. Looking for the best way to play it. If she declines, I guess I can just say, no issue. We'll figure it out and leave it like that. What's the best way to play this?

 

[Trump]

Not sure. Though, I guess I can go for broke and just hit back what's your weekend look like (or is that too aggressive for a stranger)?

Don’t be going back and forth on simple get together for drinks, Either confirm Wed or don’t.

I guess my only concern it could get a bit weird if she declines and all of us are meeting up next Monday for, ironically, drinks. She's new to the hang out group, so it's hard to play. Looking for the best way to play it. If she declines, I guess I can just say, no issue. We'll figure it out and leave it like that. What's the best way to play this?

If you see her Monday, take her out after drinks and make a solid move. By the time you meet her on Wednesday she could be pregnant by some other dude.

 

[SpeedDemon]

Don’t be going back and forth on simple get together for drinks, Either confirm Wed or don’t.



If you see her Monday, take her out after drinks and make a solid move. By the time you meet her on Wednesday she could be pregnant by some other dude.

She's an assistant district attorney. I don't think she'll be pregnant that fast. We're all meeting up after around 8pm, so can't have drinks after drinks. Though, I can work on kino with her and then it might prime her for Wed. Listen, I've been out of the dating game for a while. I am still getting the kinks out. That's probably why I sound like a guy with his tail between his legs. Just need some direction here.

 

[fanatic22]

First off, never text to confirm a date, especially days in advance. It’s weak. However, I agree people are so flaky these days that you need some kind of confirmation for virtually everything, so here’s what I suggest instead. Set loose plans (“dinner Wednesday?”) and then tighten them up at like noon on the day of (“so I was thinking Mexican at 8pm. Thoughts?”)

Second, her taking her time to cancel after your attempted confirmation speaks poorly to both her interest level and her character. You’ll probably be pulling teeth trying to get this woman to actually come through on agreed upon plans. I would’ve just ghosted.

 

[SoSuave666]

Low interest. In this instance I would tell her I'm busy next wed, how about Sunday or Monday. Force her to play by your rules. If she cannot do Sunday or Monday just charge it to the game and move on.

Agree with other poster, returning a confirmation text so late is a sign of low character as well as low interest.

 

[Glassguy]

Its 50/50...she offered to reschedule but why so far out? She have 3 other dates she is scheduled for the meantime?

This was my first thought as well.

Low interest. In this instance I would tell her I'm busy next wed, how about Sunday or Monday. Force her to play by your rules. If she cannot do Sunday or Monday just charge it to the game and move on.

Agree with other poster, returning a confirmation text so late is a sign of low character as well as low interest.

This is how I would handle it.
"I am tied up next Wednesday but I can get free this _____ (an evening much sooner than Wednesday). Let me know if that works"

Dates that are scheduled over a week out have no chance of happening.

 

[Glassguy]

Another line that I have used in a similar situation is this:

"I am a busy guy and I literally have no idea what will come up between now and next Wednesday. I can get free this Thursday. Let me know if you can make it"

 

[RangerMIke]

You are spending way too much time thinking about this. At this point anything you respond back to her will appear that you are playing chick-like games. If you do not have any plans for next Wednesday go ahead and agree to meeting her... if you are busy, counter....

FYI... I don't play games when it comes to communication. If a chick texts me and and I'm not busy, I will respond then and there. If I'm busy, I won't even notice when it comes in. It takes less than a minute to respond to a text, and as a man you should have your life planned out and you know what you are doing for the week.

If a chick is going to think less of you because you happen to have your life organized, and I respectful of someone trying to communicate with you by responding in a timely manner, then you should not want to spend any time with her.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Hey so and so, I am so sorry, but something came up, but I'd like to see you next Wednesday for drinks. LMK if that works.

I´ll see u next wednesday but u better make it up to me somehow

 

[SpeedDemon]

Responded after I got up for work around 5am. She responded with a few happy emojis shortly after. We'll see. I just said it should work, we'll confirm next week. Sometimes, my mind makes things more complicated than it needs to be. If it happens, great, if not, not the end of the world.

 

[Dash Riprock]

You are spending way too much time thinking about this. At this point anything you respond back to her will appear that you are playing chick-like games. If you do not have any plans for next Wednesday go ahead and agree to meeting her... if you are busy, counter....

FYI... I don't play games when it comes to communication. If a chick texts me and and I'm not busy, I will respond then and there. If I'm busy, I won't even notice when it comes in. It takes less than a minute to respond to a text, and as a man you should have your life planned out and you know what you are doing for the week.

If a chick is going to think less of you because you happen to have your life organized, and I respectful of someone trying to communicate with you by responding in a timely manner, then you should not want to spend any time with her.

This.

Too much thought goes into how and when you should reply to a text.

Seriously, if a chick bails or gets low IL or whatever the f*uck because you texted too soon or too late, within respectable guidelines, dump her and move on.

She countered and told you when she's free, which shows IL enough to want to meet up with you. So accept the offer but plan the date, what you're doing and where. Day of, text her something like "Looking forward to the oyster eating contest tonight! See you at 7. Ciao, Dash" No reply means no date. Never double text/call. Most, but not all, have the courtesy to text back if they can't make it.

She's 25 so she should have some semblance of courtesy in her dating habits. If she bails again, for any reason, send her a short polite text back, "Ok, no problem" go NC and leave it at that. If she reaches out, then wait a couple days to text her back if you're still interested and make her bring food and or wine/booze to your place because she's fixing you dinner. Make her do 90% of the work. Then, you'll see her REAL IL.

Good luck.

 

[SpeedDemon]

This.

Too much thought goes into how an when you should reply to a text.

Seriously, if a chick bails or gets low IL or whatever the f*uck because you texted too soon or too late, within respectable guidelines, dump her and move on.

She countered and told you when she's free, which shows IL enough to want to meet up with you. So accept the offer but plan the date, what you're doing and where. Day of, text her something like "Looking forward to the oyster eating contest tonight! See you at 7. Ciao, Dash" No reply means no date. Never double text/call. Most, but not all, have the courtesy to text back if they can't make it.

She's 25 so she should have some semblance of courtesy in her dating habits. If she bails again, for any reason, send her a short polite text back, "Ok, no problem" go NC and leave it at that. If she reaches out, then wait a couple days to text her back if you're still interested and make her bring food and or wine/booze to your place because she's fixing you dinner. Make her do 90% of the work. Then, you'll see her REAL IL.

Good luck.

Completely right. I guess I lost my cool a bit as I've not shot for women this young. I'll see her the day before with a group of friends. I'd assume she'd confirm then.

 

[RickTheToad]

I am not a Master DJ, but I am learning. If the lady gave you her number, responded to you and even though said she couldn't make it this week, but gave you another day without hesitation; I think it's a good sign. Waiting til the morning to respond, ehh, can go either way. If she texted you back after 9, then yes, I guess so, but if it was like around 7:30 or 8, you should had responded 20 or 30 minutes later.