Asked for date... She said "Maybe"

[Krueg]

Hey DJ's,

Met this girl last friday, asked for her number, she gave it to me. Called her tonight (Tuesday) but went to voice mail. She sent me a text msg saying she was working and told me to txt her back...

I said "I was calling to see if you like to meet me at (Country Bar) this Friday - dancing starts at 8pm. She texted back saying "Maybe"

Should I say... "Well, I'll be there around 7 if you wanna go."
OR just ignore/move-on/wait?

 

[lizardking82]

Go cold on her for about a week, fry other fish. Maybe this one comes back into your net by itself. If she doesn't, costs nothing to send her a message sometime around midweek next week.

 

[CMNILS87]

Just ignore. That's a low interest sign. If she has high interest she'll crawl under a bar wire fence to hang out. Once you get a girl and understand this high interest piece with her, it's easy to pick out the ****ty ones with low interest

 

[Krueg]

Thanks for the replys, you guys are probably right on the "Low-Interest." But, last time we talked she said she generally works on the weekends but is available after that. So either her schedule could be a conflict or isnt that interested.. Regardless of whether she accepts my date or not I'm planning on going out either way. Would it hurt just to say I'll be there around a certain time if she does accept?

 

[sazc]

I vote sh1t test. Her "maybe" reply is a manner in which she is trying to gauge YOUR IL

What will b\he say next? Is he going to try and convince me to go? Will he fall somewhere along the lines of pleading? Am I in control of this frame?

Go NC. That will eat at her. She will probably switch frames and put you back in control.

If not, then she is low IL and you have lost nothing

 

[bigneil]

I had a similar situation. These moments are key as they will measure us big time.

The guy next to me at the bar said "That bartender is single" so I asked "Are you single?" and she said yes. I said "This guy thinks I should ask you out" and she said "I don't know..." so I replied "that doesn't sound good" and she asked "why not?" and I said "they say a girl knows in the first 30 seconds whether she likes a guy or not" and she replied "but you are dating that other girl..." so I said "She's only 21... she's too young".

In general, we're already dead in the water the moment there is resistance early on. I only want to date girls who would jump at the chance to go out with me.

The worst part is, this girl is 31, and probably thinks I'm too old and wants a guy who is 31.01. I'll take the hotter, younger girl who loves me more, thank you. That's the #1 worst thing about women, is how when they hit 30 (the new 50) they try to compensate by dating guys who are 29. Sorry, princess, you're over the hill now and this isn't 1950 when hot guys could work at the factory to support you. He's still living with his mom, meaning you've turned into a man. Let's see how you like chasing some useless piece of as-s.

 

[devilkingx2]

People tend to assume that the maybe is to the actual date rather than maybe to the idea of going out with you.

Either way maybe is usually a no except in the 1 in 10 chance she's actually unsure

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Here's something along the same lines, but even odder.

I notice a smartly dressed lady checking me out whilst waiting at the zebra crossing. She gives me a slight smile, which I return. I go to buy my bus ticket, and blow me down if she isn't also in the station. So I strike up a conversation asking her where a particular platform is. As she also has to wait twenty minutes, we naturally go for a coffee and I get her number.

Fast forward a few days, and I send her a text. She replies [good sign] and we text back and forth a little. I then propose meeting for a coffee when she's in town next [maybe I should have gone for the drink but I remember her saying she didn't], and I get the reply; 'Sure. Maybe next time.' I just replied 'Cool.. sounds good~'. The 'maybe' seems to signal either low interest or 'game', and I tend to lose interest myself with either of these. But given she replied in the first place seems to show interest......

I've forgotten it now [apart from this recollection] and will leave it to her should she wish to re-new contact.

 

[dude99]

Hey DJ's,

Met this girl last friday, asked for her number, she gave it to me. Called her tonight (Tuesday) but went to voice mail. She sent me a text msg saying she was working and told me to txt her back...

I said "I was calling to see if you like to meet me at (Country Bar) this Friday - dancing starts at 8pm. She texted back saying "Maybe"

Should I say... "Well, I'll be there around 7 if you wanna go."
OR just ignore/move-on/wait?

Ignore. Maybe means no.

 

[dude99]

I vote sh1t test. Her "maybe" reply is a manner in which she is trying to gauge YOUR IL

What will b\he say next? Is he going to try and convince me to go? Will he fall somewhere along the lines of pleading? Am I in control of this frame?

Go NC. That will eat at her. She will probably switch frames and put you back in control.

If not, then she is low IL and you have lost nothing

I don't think this is a **** test. She already knows he is interested. He asked for her number. He called. He texted.

He started the dance. She knows he is interested.

I would say her "maybe" is a no. Or "i want to see if a better offer comes along so I won't commit."

If she was interested she would say yes or counter. If she wanted to gauge his interest she would go out and talk to him.

Sounds like she is waiting for a better offer.

 

[Milano]

In the words of Nismo...

"she wouldn't say 'Maybe' to Channing Tatum, would she?"

Agreed. I like to use DiCaprio in my head when I hear this flaky ****. Point is, trust your gut with these things and continue increasing your own value. She has better options atm. What you could do just for fun is tell her as a goodbye gift, "Im sorry, I dont do maybes". There is a very small chance that turned her on and made her curious enough to want to give it a shot. Still, we dont want flaky girls, you are worth much more remember! You are the **** son

 

[wifehunter]

Walk

 

[Who Dares Win]

Agree with the guys above, she knows he is interested so she has no need to guage anything from him.

That maybe is either a soft rejection or a standy invitation just to keep him available if no better offer arises.

In my life all the maybes meant no and no interest except the few ones said in persone with a smile and a blink while her hand was on my c0ck right after I asked for a blowj0b.

 

[sazc]

I don't think this is a **** test. She already knows he is interested. He asked for her number. He called. He texted.

He started the dance. She knows he is interested.

I would say her "maybe" is a no. Or "i want to see if a better offer comes along so I won't commit."

If she was interested she would say yes or counter. If she wanted to gauge his interest she would go out and talk to him.

Sounds like she is waiting for a better offer.

She would say all of that, if she wasnt sh1t testing him. Men and women both like to play the 'idk' game to gauge interest. Should I give him the time of day? Hmmmmm.....how hard will he pursue if I dont commit?

The truth is that everything posted on these boards is all speculation. We can never know for sure.

I definitely think it's a waste of time to pay any more attention to her. She may come around, she may not, there are definitely females that will say yes immediately. always make that a priority.

 

[Roober]

The key is interest and this applies to everybody you interact with... I was recently invited to a party and realized people do this to friends, family, etc. If they are uninterested or not likely to make it, they will give some piss poor excuse or say... "I will try to make it" when talking to people and inviting them places., think of this...

Anything other than a yes is a no!

 

[Masculinity]

I said "I was calling to see if you like to meet me at (Country Bar) this Friday - dancing starts at 8pm. She texted back saying "Maybe"

You don't want to seem like you're seeking for approval when you extend invitations to women. Invite her to a place you'd enjoy going anyway and write "I'm going to xyz country bar this Friday. Join me."

This message says "I'm te make of my reality and you can tag along. But either way I'll be fine." If she shows, great. If she doesn't, great, I'm 100% sure there will be other women at the country bar.

As for the date, I would go ghost like other guys have advised. The person least interested in a relationship is the one with the most control.

 

[mikey2012]

Low interest . Move on

 

[lizardking82]

Right HERE is when you have the leverage of maintaining the frame.

I would have waited a day or two to text.

One more little move of the finger by him now and he's already chasing and we all know how that usually ends up.

 

[dude99]

She would say all of that, if she wasnt sh1t testing him. Men and women both like to play the 'idk' game to gauge interest. Should I give him the time of day? Hmmmmm.....how hard will he pursue if I dont commit?

The truth is that everything posted on these boards is all speculation. We can never know for sure.

I definitely think it's a waste of time to pay any more attention to her. She may come around, she may not, there are definitely females that will say yes immediately. always make that a priority.

I agree he should not waste any time on her. There are women who will say yes.

I know for a fact that women will say maybe when they have no intention on going. Most girls don't like to ever say no because of the dudes who cant handle rejection make it awkward for them and some even say maybe because they want to keep him interested as an orbiter.

He made his play. He didn't get a yes. He should move on. If by some chance she comes around so be it but he shouldn't waste time and effort and become one of those can't take a hint guys... (not saying he is one of them)

 

[Roober]

I agree he should not waste any time on her. There are women who will say yes.

I know for a fact that women will say maybe when they have no intention on going. Most girls don't like to ever say no because of the dudes who cant handle rejection make it awkward for them and some even say maybe because they want to keep him interested as an orbiter.

He made his play. He didn't get a yes. He should move on. If by some chance she comes around so be it but he shouldn't waste time and effort and become one of those can't take a hint guys... (not saying he is one of them)

I have heard this from numerous women. I have even heard some women say they will give out their number, then don't ever respond to their messages... with a response... "he seemed like a nice guy"... also, probably to keep the guy around as a just in case scenario...

women... the ultimate plate spinners