Give it a chance. It's helped many people more than any other program. It's stood the test of time. You'll find that the anxiety you experience contemplating the meeting and recovery process is more painful than the doing. As men we hate to show vulnerability. Don't worry about that. Just take the first step. Don't worry about the second and third etc. That's your brain doing what it is used to doing. You will meet people that have had similar experiences or worse. People that barely know you but will be a friend regardless of whether you think you deserve a friend or not. People you can call in moments of weakness. People that will become friends for life and that will understand you better than your own family. You don't have to be a Christian for it to work but you will still realize there is a higher power. What have you got to lose?Aa meetings not a fan what has been your experiences?