article : Great Expectations: The Soulmate Quest

[MatureDJ]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200403/great-expectations-the-soul-mate-quest

What I get out of this article is that women are very demanding about the partner, and because of a seemingly high level of choice in the sexual market, think they can always do better - with hypergamy as the result.

 

[Inquisitus]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200403/great-expectations-the-soul-mate-quest

What I get out of this article is that women are very demanding about the partner, and because of a seemingly high level of choice in the sexual market, think they can always do better - with hypergamy as the result.

What i get is that this over arching cultural shift to the self means that both men & women are always looking for the next best thing. The result is that marriage is panned and that there is a sky high divorce rate.

People are getting married for the wrong reasons.

 

[omkara]

I totally agree with this article. I wish other people realized this. I am just looking for someone who wants to settle, not for life, but for a while. And since most women are brainwashed and just think what the other women think, they all buy into this soul mate concept. Every time I go on a date, I'm being scrutinized to see if I match some impossible ideal.

 

[omkara]

We live in a culture where, increasingly, people are choosing short-term happiness over long-term happiness. We don't even have the culture in place to teach people how to maintain long-term happiness.

 

[synergy1]

We live in a culture where, increasingly, people are choosing short-term happiness over long-term happiness. We don't even have the culture in place to teach people how to maintain long-term happiness.

this might be impossible. Its a proven fact that people discount the future and are generally unable to know how they will feel about future events right now. You can't instill a forward thinking ideology on a species that 'barely' gets it. Its like trying to teach a dog calculus...

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

,..think they can always do better - with hypergamy as the result.

You're mistaking cause and effect. Hypergamy is women's natural, evolved condition that existed long before they had a larger pool of potential mates. With such a large group to sample from, it's this innate hypergamy that causes women to think they could (and should) be doing better than what they settle for.

 

[Poonani Maker]

I totally agree with this article. I wish other people realized this. I am just looking for someone who wants to settle, not for life, but for a while. And since most women are brainwashed and just think what the other women think, they all buy into this soul mate concept. Every time I go on a date, I'm being scrutinized to see if I match some impossible ideal.

You know what I do? I watch Them like a hawk, and scrutinize Them. Turn the tables. Set the frame, even IF the one you are with is not buying in to your frame. You must BELIEVE you're the prize No Matter What. Nothing must shake you from this belief (even if you had a missing arm or leg) that "All women want to sleep with me," that "no matter how much she gets angry or disrespects me, she wants to sleep with me." Your actions, and others' will conform to your believe about what's happening around you, your Take on what this means and what that means, even if she doesn't (initially) believe your take on why she did/said such and such (that it's apart of her course of action to sleep with you).

 

[omkara]

Thanks for the advice man, mad props. I definitely need to try something different. I tried finding the girl that I could be sappy around, but that didn't work. Even if I went way uglier, it still didn't work! hahaha

 

[goodfoot]

Thanks for the advice man, mad props. I definitely need to try something different. I tried finding the girl that I could be sappy around, but that didn't work. Even if I went way uglier, it still didn't work! hahaha

Yea, it's crazy. I can have 3 plates, and they all know I'm seeing other girls. Then if I try to get in a relationship with one, it only lasts a few weeks. I can find three girls that don't mind sharing me, but I can't find one that wants me all to herself.

 

[Zarky]

The concept of having one life-partner has lasted for about 500 years. It started dying in the latter half of the 20th century. Soon it will be buried.

Get used to it, life partnerships are a thing of the past. I, personally, am happy about that. Lots of guys (and even more girls) aren't. But that's how it is and that's how it will be. Adapt, or cry.

In the future, everyone will be spinning plates, their whole lives. I'm happy to be one of the pioneers of that new cultural order.

 

[Burroughs]

Even if I went way uglier, it still didn't work! hahaha

This is something most men cannot grasp.

ALL GIRLS WANT THE SAME DUDES...GET IT.

the hb 4,5,6,7,8,9,10 all want Tom Brady...yep that hb 5 fugly chick thinks in the right circumstance she could snag Aaron Rodgers, and even a 8-9 hb regular dude won't cut it...yes folks we are in Blade Runner insane dating times

you think to yourself well I'm a solid 8 man so this hb 7 chick will be happy to have me...BZZZZZZ..wrong!

The hb 7 chick pines for a hb 10 famous man..unreasonable yes..kookoo for cocoa puffs yes...but this ain't gonna change.

 

[Rubirosa]

The concept of having one life-partner has lasted for about 500 years. It started dying in the latter half of the 20th century. Soon it will be buried.

Get used to it, life partnerships are a thing of the past. I, personally, am happy about that. Lots of guys (and even more girls) aren't. But that's how it is and that's how it will be. Adapt, or cry.

In the future, everyone will be spinning plates, their whole lives. I'm happy to be one of the pioneers of that new cultural order.

I agree, but what about the concept of a family unit ? I bet that most of us on this forum (The Mature Man) grew up in a household with both parents. While I agree that the disinigration of marriage is due to the arrogance of American women and the White Knight legal system that supports their arrogance, I worry about the future of western society without the family unit acting as a base of stability for a young population...........

 

[Rubirosa]

This is something most men cannot grasp.

ALL GIRLS WANT THE SAME DUDES...GET IT.

the hb 4,5,6,7,8,9,10 all want Tom Brady...yep that hb 5 fugly chick thinks in the right circumstance she could snag Aaron Rodgers, and even a 8-9 hb regular dude won't cut it...yes folks we are in Blade Runner insane dating times

you think to yourself well I'm a solid 8 man so this hb 7 chick will be happy to have me...BZZZZZZ..wrong!

The hb 7 chick pines for a hb 10 famous man..unreasonable yes..kookoo for cocoa puffs yes...but this ain't gonna change.

Yeah but what element of our modern society is causing this delusional female thinking ?

 

[Burroughs]

Yeah but what element of our modern society is causing this delusional female thinking ?

Media and banking have known for ages that women are 'emotional spenders' so it is in their interests to promote womyn in all things material and social. Womyn were given rights solely so they could become taxable entities and their labor monetized.

 

[Zarky]

I agree, but what about the concept of a family unit ? I bet that most of us on this forum (The Mature Man) grew up in a household with both parents. While I agree that the disinigration of marriage is due to the arrogance of American women and the White Knight legal system that supports their arrogance, I worry about the future of western society without the family unit acting as a base of stability for a young population...........

Meh, something else will come along. I'm sure that's what people said about slavery too. "What are we going to do without our slaves?" Just because something's been around a long time doesn't mean it's necessarily a good thing, or that something can't come along that's better.

 

[omkara]

Soft matriarchy is unsustainable, simply because women don't do enough to maintain civilization. We are just riding on fumes now. A society that does not reward productive men cannot advance, or even maintain the trappings of civilization. So enjoy it while it lasts.

There has never been an advanced matriarchal society and there never will be.