Are the majority of advice givers here bitter and jaded?

[:-)]

Or is their advice sound and reliable? Just asking because some relationships might depend on the advice. Plus I've noticed that when some disagree they get b1tchy with one another. Exactly the opposite of how they advise an alpha to act with their women. What do you think?

 

[FairShake]

Yes the majority of commentators here are bitter and jaded and Yes their advice is sound and reliable.

Relationships turn everyone, man or woman, gay or straight, bitter and jaded. Watch your ass is what I tell EVERYONE who asks my advice.

 

[:-)]

Fair enough. But what about advice from someone like below. See how he makes numerous assumptions about the case on details he himself admit are vague. He goes so far to advise the OP that his relationship is over and his girlfriend is on the way out. I'm not saying his advice is wrong but to give such an authoritative account from so little information is a bit of a liberty, isn't it?

You're a little vauge on the details here. What is the purpose for her having to stay with this guy?

Is this a business trip for work? How far away is it from you? Why can't she commmute from her place? Why can't she stay with family, friends, a female co worker instead, get a motel instead?

Obviously she's been talking to this guy about it from the start without using any other options she has. She feels it is ok to stay with this guy because she was talking to him about it and decided that's what she is going to do.

She is showing no respect for you and is putting your relationship in jeopardy. She didn't ask you about it, she is telling you that's what she is going to do. She didn't condsider you not once at all this whole time.

Do you think a girl who is 100% in love with you would even consider doing this? No way man. She would thank the guy for offering but say she has a boyfriend and can't stay and use her other options. Your girlfriend didn't do that she has already decided she is going to stay with him whether you approve or not.

Setting a boundary is a waste of time, it won't work. She has already made up her mind what she is going to do. If you try to set a boundary she is going to walk right over it.

She is telling you this because she wants to see what kind of reaction you're going to have so she can use it to dump you later on if you get angry, mad, or refuse for her to go. She will hit you with the "you don't trust me" line and hold it against you and make it to be your fault.

You're way too trusting of this woman and making excuses for her. There is no reason she should be spending a week under the same roof with this guy. She has other options to choose from but doesn't want to use them. Women aren't stupid when it comes to stuff like this, they know what they are doing. If they like a guy they will do anything to be with him. That is what she is doing with this guy. They also know if they love a man as much as they say, they won't do anything to ruin the relationship.

Talking to her like these other posters suggested is a waste of time. She won't listen to you and that is what an AFC does. Trying to reason with a woman who has already decided her decision. It will lead to a fight and you will be hurt when she doesn't listen to you and goes to stay with him anyway.

All you have to do is make it known that you don't take her seriously as a girlfriend.

I'm just warning you that your relationship is just about over. She will be pulling the plug on it shortly. When a woman is staying with another man, talked about it with the other guy, already decided it, then informs you to see your reaction, it is over.

Do you have women you can invite over to your place? I would do that ASAP. Your girlfriend doesn't respect you bro, she is on her wsy out to be with this other guy.

 

[JoeMarron]

At the end of the day we're all just giving our opinions based on our experience and view of the world. Anyone would be a complete dumbass to take all the advice here without a grain of salt. We all have brains that are capable of rational thought. Accept the stuff that makes sense to you and filter out the stuff that doesn't. If a dude's relationship failed because he took bad advice then it's his own damn fault.

 

[HowardHughesDicaprio]

Bitter, jaded, and likely inexperienced but boasting about how good they are with women. I have seen this **** so much in the Manosphere that I can pick out a good storyteller from a guy that actually has a life and success with women. Guys who are good with women (attractive ones at that) are usually happy. Think of it like sports, how often do you see players on championship winning teams whining about how unfair the game is?

That is exactly the way it is with forums and guys who attempt to give advice but are loaded with anger and hate, they wish they lived a certain life they cannot live and just air out their frustration on the forum. To protect their ego they attempt to sound like they have so much knowledge of the game when some of these guys could not get laid even if those opportunities presented themselves.

Those are the majority of men but a small number actually offer good advice and live solid lives.

 

[Redwood]

Are they bitter and jaded? Most likely.

Could they be keyboard jockeys? Maybe.

That doesn't stop the light the comes at the end of the tunnel. There's plenty of sound advice here from experienced posters. In the end, experience in the current dating market would make anyone bitter/jaded, but it is how you deal with it that determines who you are.

 

[Echoes]

Certain guys here, like the guy who you quoted in your second post, are simply regurgitating everything they read in the so-called manosphere. They have memorized all the formulas, tactics, routines, pseudo-psychology etc and they spit it out like a computer program.

They take it so seriously that they forget to process it in terms of the context of their own lives. They really do think that ALL women are the same, that there is only ONE way to deal with women, that there is a step by step manual for every encounter. This is of course rubbish.

I am a professional musician. I teach some private lessons on the side to make a little extra cash. There are numerous types of students, but in general everyone falls into one of two categories:

-Those who take what you teach them, view it with an open mind and with an attitude of humility, and run with it...applying it to their own particular musical situations in a way that works for them and helps them grow and find their own path. They view so called "music theory" correctly; as a set of guidelines, an analysis of what successful musicians before them have done, rather than a set in stone list of rules.


-Those who memorize all the music theory in the world and can tell you in a split second what scale goes with what chord but never practice it in a way that makes sense or fits their own personal, musical situations. They view music theory as a set of rules that must be adhered to or else they are doing it "wrong".

Can you guess which type of student ends up actually being able to play their instrument successfully? Sure, both types may be able to technically "play" but which one is going sound best, develop their own personal style, and have a more meaningful relationship with music?

It's the first guy...every time.

Unfortunately much of the advice I see on this website comes from guy number two...he has all the rules memorized but doesn't know when to bend them to work in the context of his own experience.

Everything you read in any thread on this forum should be taken with a grain of salt. There is a lot to be learned, but there is no foolproof blueprint. Not every encounter is going to be the same, no two women are going to be exactly the same. The sooner people realize this, the sooner they will be able to personalize and apply what they learn in a way that suits their own experience.

 

[HowardHughesDicaprio]

Are they bitter and jaded? Most likely.

Could they be keyboard jockeys? Maybe.

That doesn't stop the light the comes at the end of the tunnel. There's plenty of sound advice here from experienced posters. In the end, experience in the current dating market would make anyone bitter/jaded, but it is how you deal with it that determines who you are.

I have experience in the dating market and I am a happy dude overall. Sure some cities might suck and terrible women exist but most of these guys are keyboard jockeys getting on the forum for an ego boost to show everyone how much they know and get some measly validation over the web. A lot have no life experience and have lived their entire existence out on the internet.

 

[goldengoose]

Fair enough. But what about advice from someone like below. See how he makes numerous assumptions about the case on details he himself admit are vague. He goes so far to advise the OP that his relationship is over and his girlfriend is on the way out. I'm not saying his advice is wrong but to give such an authoritative account from so little information is a bit of a liberty, isn't it?

HAHAHA Hilarious.

When a girlfriend 3 months into a relationship is staying with another guy she isn't taking the bf seriously. 3 months is nothing. Get another woman.

You know what they say, when you have haters you must be doing something right.

Peaks and Valleys also accused me of being a KJ, bitter, and giving misguided advice.

I was 100% with the advice I gave. The OP agrees too.

**** this flake! When she did originally text me with the excuse I told her not to worry and that I had it covered, this is where she told me that no she didn't like other people paying for her! The plan was to go to a road in a city that has lots of bars etc, I planned it and was even picking her up the lot (I get that you Gota make a good impression and take the lead etc which is exactly what I did, but jeez I'm not gonna beg her to go out with me, when she clearly doesn't want to!

I completely agree that this chick flaked, using some lame excuse. I couldn't care less if it was a test...if she really liked me and wanted to meet me she wouldn't be throwing out any test...standard!

I have heard nothing from her, her number has been deleted and I won't be contacting her again. The excuse about the shoelaces is funny though man, that is definetly getting thrown out there sometime in the future!

She must have some form of money, it's the start of the month FFS. I can guarantee she is off out this weekend.

Yeah guys I'm from England skint means poor she was the one who added super to make her excuse look even more valid!

Respect to golden goose

And Jaylan's response

^You missed that part where goldengoose was completely right about her lack of interest. A girl doesnt deserve another chance after flaking the way this chick did. Not only did she bailed last minute, she gave the OP a bs excuse, and refused to accept his offer to treat her.

Ive NEVER had an interested woman behave in this way. Why the fvk should she be put on a pedestal and given another chance? Let her chase him as the prize if she wants another chance. Giving her a chance and inviting her out again only reinforces to her that hes more into it than she is. Fvk that noise.

Not bad for being a bitter misguided KJ eh?

Here is the thread in case you AFC's want to learn something about women.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=216998

 

[BeDJ]

HAHAHA Hilarious.

When a girlfriend 3 months into a relationship is staying with another guy she isn't taking the bf seriously. 3 months is nothing. Get another woman.

You know what they say, when you have haters you must be doing something right.

Peaks and Valleys also accused me of being a KJ, bitter, and giving misguided advice.

I was 100% with the advice I gave. The OP agrees too.



And Jaylan's response



Not bad for being a bitter misguided KJ eh?

Here is the thread in case you AFC's want to learn something about women.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=216998

Well,

You do come off as an arrogant know-it-all. It's a forum after all, not everyone has the same mindset, perspective, experience or goals. Perhaps tone it down a bit?

 

[Echoes]

Well,

You do come off as an arrogant know-it-all. It's a forum after all, not everyone has the same mindset, perspective, experience or goals. Perhaps tone it down a bit?

Yeah....there is a lot of AMOG'ing that goes on here I've noticed. It seems to me that much of the time people aren't actually trying to help but rather trying to boost up their own egos. It's a shame really.

 

[:-)]

Many of us are in sound relationships with good women. Meanwhile we have also been around the block with women and know the signs of a terrible prospect.

These statements only appear as dubious "assumptions" to those who have limited experience with women. .

In a recent thread (http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=216928&page=3) you are attacking another advice-giver and are consistently a mile off with your assumptions. Even when the OP interjects to confirm the other advice-giver is correct you still refuse to back down. Like some angry little doggie.

http://images.sodahead.com/polls/004133613/3925413386_sweet_doggie_xlarge.jpeg

You are assuming I have limited experience with women because it appears some assumptions are dubious (that thread proves yours are) but the reality is I've probably slept with more women than you.

 

[:-)]

Certain guys here, like the guy who you quoted in your second post, are simply regurgitating everything they read in the so-called manosphere. They have memorized all the formulas, tactics, routines, pseudo-psychology etc and they spit it out like a computer program.

They take it so seriously that they forget to process it in terms of the context of their own lives. They really do think that ALL women are the same, that there is only ONE way to deal with women, that there is a step by step manual for every encounter. This is of course rubbish.

I am a professional musician. I teach some private lessons on the side to make a little extra cash. There are numerous types of students, but in general everyone falls into one of two categories:

-Those who take what you teach them, view it with an open mind and with an attitude of humility, and run with it...applying it to their own particular musical situations in a way that works for them and helps them grow and find their own path. They view so called "music theory" correctly; as a set of guidelines, an analysis of what successful musicians before them have done, rather than a set in stone list of rules.


-Those who memorize all the music theory in the world and can tell you in a split second what scale goes with what chord but never practice it in a way that makes sense or fits their own personal, musical situations. They view music theory as a set of rules that must be adhered to or else they are doing it "wrong".

Can you guess which type of student ends up actually being able to play their instrument successfully? Sure, both types may be able to technically "play" but which one is going sound best, develop their own personal style, and have a more meaningful relationship with music?

It's the first guy...every time.

Unfortunately much of the advice I see on this website comes from guy number two...he has all the rules memorized but doesn't know when to bend them to work in the context of his own experience.

Everything you read in any thread on this forum should be taken with a grain of salt. There is a lot to be learned, but there is no foolproof blueprint. Not every encounter is going to be the same, no two women are going to be exactly the same. The sooner people realize this, the sooner they will be able to personalize and apply what they learn in a way that suits their own experience.

That's an interesting response. I'm learning to play the guitar at the moment. I picked up the guitar because it was fun and I wanted to learn Stairway To Heaven but the more I looked into the guitar world the more intimidated I felt by guys who were obsessed with pentatonic scales and shredding etc. I felt Like I wasn't a guitarist if I didn't know how to shred a pentatonic scale when all I want to do is play Stairway.

Anyway, so far I think:

5th fret pentatonic = A chord
10th fret pentatonic = D chord
12th fret pentatonic = E chord
13th fret pentatonic = F chord

?

 

[Echoes]

That's an interesting response. I'm learning to play the guitar at the moment. I picked up the guitar because it was fun and I wanted to learn Stairway To Heaven but the more I looked into the guitar world the more intimidated I felt by guys who were obsessed with pentatonic scales and shredding etc. I felt Like I wasn't a guitarist if I didn't know how to shred a pentatonic scale when all I want to do is play Stairway.

Anyway, so far I think:

5th fret pentatonic = A chord
10th fret pentatonic = D chord
12th fret pentatonic = E chord
13th fret pentatonic = F chord

?

You've got a decent start on the pentatonic scales, but keep in mind there are major chords and minor chords, and major and minor penatonics to go along with them...not to mention the other scale choices besides pentatonics.

Without completely derailing this entire thread, there are 5 basic pentatonic fingerings for every key, and each fingering can be used in either a minor or major key (for instance, same fingerings will work in A minor and C major). So you can play in any major or minor key everywhere on the neck.

There are only 12 notes in our system of music, and all of them are available in any position on the guitar. You could play in all 12 major keys and all 12 minor keys without moving your hand up or down the neck at all.

PM me if you want more help...and don't be intimidated by anyone. Some of my favorite guitarists aren't "shredders" at all. Music is not about finger gymnastics, but rather artistic expression.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Never believe 100% of what ANYONE tells you. Ever. In my humble opinion, the only real truth that can be obtained if through your own subjective experience and perception. That being said, there are being more experienced/qualified than you at any given time, and you should try to learn and absorb what you can.

But always remember... while people here may be more experienced and flat out more correct than you are...they don't know the details of any given circumstance better than you. If a person comes on here asking for advice... people can only give them advice based on the story a poster has given, which may or may not have included all the necessary information (usually it hasn't). That being said... sometimes you are so blinded by your own subjectivity and rationalization that you do indeed need external people who can "think clearly" by having an outside perspective and tell you what you maybe didn't want to hear.

It's important that we ban together here and strive to accomplish something good rather than falling into the negativity and criticism that often makes the internet an unbearable place. Everyone has an opinion and people are perhaps even more willing to share and get angry about it when safely hidden behind a keyboard on an anonymous forum. I mean just read the comment boxes of nearly any place on the internet and you'll see what I mean. I do believe that this forum in general is more open minded and accepting than many places on the internet, especially in terms of the pua community or manosphere. It does have its ugly moments, but that is to be expected. I just hope that it accomplishes more good than bad.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Maybe you are just overly optimistic....its a 2 way street

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

As we're going for sweeping generalisations here, I'll tack another one on for good measure.

The Manosphere is rife with sweeping generalisations about men, women, relationships and human behaviour, with very little concern for scientific review, appraisal of circumstance or the application of logic.

So what if some are bitter and twisted. I personally find reading the experiences and advice of others in similar positions reassuring when formulating my own ideas and decisions.

 

[DonGorgon]

"bitter and jaded" lol if you can't handle reality and it makes you cry then go find another forum that has members willing too baby you and tell you lies just so you FEEEEEEL better lol

 

[:-)]

Nobody's crying. Was just asking.

 

[HowardHughesDicaprio]

The Manosphere is rife with sweeping generalisations about men, women, relationships and human behaviour, with very little concern for scientific review, appraisal of circumstance or the application of logic.

Lets be objective here. The manosphere is mostly males who wish they had success with women, do not have success with women, can't deal with the reality and as a result make up stories on the web about how they slept with models when anyone with some common sense can tell you they are full of ****. It is mostly a cult like following where sociopaths with ego problems cannot face the reality, they just aren't desirable to women.