Are high flakes common with online dating?

[Knight of Roses]

I've usually gone through spurts with online dating in the past several years. I usually go for several months where I try to spin as many plates as I can, then take a break, then come back to the game. Something strange about this time around, I've noticed an exceedingly high number of flakes and lack of manners.

I usually run a basic script when I match with a girl on an online app; I chit chat for 1-2 messages, ask her to happy hour, do number exchange, and set up the meet. Same formula I've used in the past. Seems this time around, women are flaking exceptionally high percentages. Some right after the match, some mid-way during conversation. Some even after number exchange and date has been set.

I'm not really offended, it's part of the game, you take it as it comes. But, just wanting to see if others have had similar experiences in the past several months. Maybe something in the water?

 

[nismo-4]

Consider how many online platforms women are on.

Any given woman has 15 minimum guys hitting on her.

A woman can drop you for having too much, not enough, or none of something. Even something like owning a PS4, cheering for Alabama, or being a Gemini can hurt you. Even not being a criminal or millionaire can hurt you.

It's all about timing and what the woman wants at the time you talk to her. Maybe they see you're about your business and won't be an orbiter/ just friends/ emotional tampon (a beta cuck) and they need orbiters.

Online, you gotta show you're first place. The goal is sex first, then anything else. No orbiters.

This happens because of too many options, and international options at that. The one strike policy will help greatly.

 

[HankHill]

Yep very common nowadays. This is what a lot of guys who aren't on OLD don't get. The game has changed a lot in the last 2yrs but you just gotta keep on truck'n. Funny thing is I've had women b*tched and complained about how OLD sucks because they also get flaked on, ghosted on, asked for sex on the first msg/date etc. The same women turned around and did similar stuff, it's pure madness if you try to make any sense of it, so don't even bother.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Yep very common nowadays. This is what a lot of guys who aren't on OLD don't get. The game has changed a lot in the last 2yrs but you just gotta keep on truck'n. Funny thing is I've had women b*tched and complained about how OLD sucks because they also get flaked on, ghosted on, asked for sex on the first msg/date etc. The same women turned around and did similar stuff, it's pure madness if you try to make any sense of it, so don't even bother.

Think with your c0cks and youll do fine.

 

[Bible_Belt]

This is why. No real connection made. It's just a date with a stranger. Nothing off their back if they cancel/no show.

This is why I chat them up a little beforehand. I don't do it for the get to know you. It is to separate myself from other men. Be different, tickle their funny bone, get them intrigued. They show up 100% of the time.

I have a zero flake rate.

Zero.

Well said, I agree very much. I always thought the consensus advice of minimal contact as showing a scarcity of options, as in a 'I hope I don't fvck this up' kind of frame. If you have options, like women do, then screening a few of them out is not a loss. It is saving yourself time and effort.

 

[Knight of Roses]

This is why. No real connection made. It's just a date with a stranger. Nothing off their back if they cancel/no show.

This is why I chat them up a little beforehand. I don't do it for the get to know you. It is to separate myself from other men. Be different, tickle their funny bone, get them intrigued. They show up 100% of the time.

I have a zero flake rate.

Zero.

What's your opinion on the thought that too much talking also leads to flakes? I mean, I've had situations in where girls have just left the conversation mid-way through before I even ask for number or set up a date. Does that happen to you as well or no?

 

[AttackFormation]

It's not about how much you talk. The number of paragraphs.... sentences…. completely irrelevant.

It's all about content. Feel. Emotion. Delivery. Persona....

View attachment 1853

Chat chat chat, yada yada yada.... then this:

View attachment 1854

Any woman you can get to this point will show up.

You don't get there by "setting the date"; in and out as fast as possible.

You have to give them a reason.

The fact that she is answering in complete sentences is already very remarkable, the double texting too. Whether that's to do with her, or what you make her do, I can't say. But women who do this have been the only ones I've had any success with on OLD, as far as I can remember.

 

[The Duke]

Every girl I have spent some time talking with on the phone and or texting before the date resulted in a flake rate of 5%. The girls that I barely texted/talked to before the date had a flake rate of 30%. Put some thought into what girls you are really interested in and compatible with and spend the time talking to them before hand and you will get much better results. A little upfront investment also makes it easier to have sex sooner! Figure out what works for you and what doesn't, adjust your game/style/mode of operation to achieve the best results and go for it.

 

[HankHill]

For what it's worth, the flake rate for me is higher if the date is too far out (like 5+ days). If it's in the next two or three days zero flake rate.

I just had a flake today, meaning we were meeting tonight. I talked to her a day ago, all good. Last night I sent a message and no response, and this is a woman who liked me first, started the convo first, funny banter the first few days...there's just no explanation sometimes other than SQUIRREL!!

 

[Dr.Suave]

Very good advice in here. You can also consider doublebooking or invite them to places you were going to anyway.

 

[Knight of Roses]

For what it's worth, the flake rate for me is higher if the date is too far out (like 5+ days). If it's in the next two or three days zero flake rate.

I just had a flake today, meaning we were meeting tonight. I talked to her a day ago, all good. Last night I sent a message and no response, and this is a woman who liked me first, started the convo first, funny banter the first few days...there's just no explanation sometimes other than SQUIRREL!!

Yeah, same issue. I use Bumble where girl initiates conversation, replies really quickly to my messages, and then all of a sudden just stops texting. And you're like "Wtf?"

 

[HankHill]

Yeah, same issue. I use Bumble where girl initiates conversation, replies really quickly to my messages, and then all of a sudden just stops texting. And you're like "Wtf?"

Really sorry about taking your matches bro lol! Seriously, you know women on Bumble have just so many options they just can't decide. Whomever is the flavor of the hr is who she's replying to.

 

[sangheilios]

This has probably already been mentioned on here, but you need to consider that a woman is probably talking to a dozen or more other guys on dating sites and apps. I wouldn't take any of this personally, though this is the reason why I feel like approaching and meeting women in the real world is far better.